Tag Archives: The Tudors

Thighs Wide Telly 2010

was last year really the first year we had a TV awards??? no time for looking back, and only time for looking forward. hactually, this is a look back, at what was bestest in 2010 TV, and while some songs remain the same, new fun can always be found on the tube boobs!!!

1. Misfits (E4, England)

Remember how Heroes sputtered in its 2nd season. Yeah, that really sucked, so spankfully there wasn’t any sophomore slump for the British ASBO-super hero super dooooper show Misfits, which juss earned our choice for the bestest of the bestest FOR THE SECOND YEAR IN A ROW!!!! it’s not even fair to call this a TV show. it’s like watching the dopest and innovative movie week after week that doesn’t play in a theater!!! don’t wanna say too much more about what actually happens, hispecially since you/us Americans probably never even heard about this show (outside of our glowing tweets), and that’s the biggest crying shame, but you can do something about it. (CLICK THE ‘it’ TO DO SOMETHING ABOUT IT!!! trust us). oh, and after all the Clockwork Orange location love, The Shining refs almos shined even mo!

2. 30 for 30 (ESPN)

So what if the top 2 picks are the same ones as last year, cause nothing new or used was remotely comparable. That was quite the honor for 30 for 30 last year, considering only 7 of the 30 docs aired, and so watching 23 more entries in this glorious and unprecedented series was more of a delight than watching Judith Light and Tony Danza fight to see Who’s The Boss. Sure, not all of them were winners, but a majority of them were. Stand outs include Guru of Go, The 16th Man (it was better than Invictus!!!), June 17, 1994, The Two Escobars and Into the Wind. Bestestest news of all? ESPN are liars and have 3 more above the 30 to drop on us in 2011, including the one we’ve been waiting for mostest

3. Sherlock (BBC/PBS)

No wonder this aired on PBS’ Masterpiece Theater, cause the three 90-minute episodes were juss that, theater thats be a masterpiece!!!!!!! Only question is, when can we see the next batch?

4. The Increasingly Poor Decisions of Todd Margaret (IFC)

Life a bit empty and a lot less funny in an Arrested Development-less world? Todd Margaret fills the void, and then some, and awesome with David Cross to bear/bare. Mos deaf = funniest moment on TV in 2010!!! Anyone know where we can buy a can of Thunder Muscle?

5. Party Down (Starz)

With Jane Lynch trading in her pink bowtie for large checks over on Glee, we thought for a moment that Party Down would go nowhere but down. Well who knew that newbie Megan Mullally could be such a valuable employee of funny (see the ep ‘Nick DiCintio’s Orgy Night’ for proof)? Also, 2192989278 bonus points for employing Fred Savage as a director!!! Sadly, all good things that have no audience muss come to an end, and after its cancellation, Party Down enters the ranks of Twin Peaks and the British Office as two season wonders that keep us wondering what if…

6. This Is England ’86 (Channel 4, England)

Imagine if one of yer mos flavorite movies of the past decade relaunched the partying 3 years after the fact, but on the small screen, and yet still kicked major major major ballistics. That is eggzactly what happened with This Is England and its equally killah lil TV brother This Is England ’86!!! Good news is that ’90 is a go!

7. The Innetweeners (E4, England)

Will, Jay, Neil & Simon are the new John, Paul, George & Ringo. Emily, Emily & Hannah are the newest additions to our JO collection. Thanks for the 3 beyond solid seasons lads & lasses. Any chance the movie plays in America? Would be better than all the American Pies combined times 32837!!!

8. Hard Knocks: The New York
and 24/7 Penguins/Capitals: Road to the NHL Winter
(both HBO)

Rex Ryan & Bruce Brodeau both deserve their own channels (or a buddy cop comedy), and 238824354 refrigerators. Lets go eat a goddam snack.

9. Dexter (Showtime)

How do you top last year’s Lithgow’s afterglow? You don’t, but Johnny Lee Miller as a mysterious motivation speaker is motivation enuff to keep Dexter on our list. Think most people hated Lumen. We didn’t. She made Dexter happy, and a happy Dexter is a happy we. Also, LOVED the Six Feet Under ref in Ep 1

10. Kendra (E!)

Who knew being a football wife of a journeyman NFL player could be so heartbreaking? This is the only reality show worth watching

11. Entourage (HBO)

Stuff finally happened!!!!! 3 cheers to coke snorting & Sasha Grey’s boobs (& too hairy bush?? [SFW])!! Yes, this was the 11th best show in TV in 2010. Yes, it was more betterer this year than Mad Men

speaking of…

other solid forms of entertainments: In Treatment, Mad Men, The Tudors, Breaking Bad, Making & Selling Jeans In America, Community, Rubicon, Chilrden’s Hospital, Modern Family, Real Sports With Bryant Gumbel, Real World: New Orleans, Boardwalk Empire, The Big C, Skins, Eastbound & Down, The Walking Dead, Outsouced and yes, Desperate Housewives


bone-yes moments

Sally Draper/Kiernan Shipka!!!!

boo to the end of at The Movies, but yea to a talking Ebert!!

The Lost finale sucked, and so did the last 2 seasons

Temple Grandin was the bestest TV movie of the year. so dang good in fact that they should have released it as a movie in theaters!!

Skins season underwhelms, but still…

+ killing off one of their wurstest characters, and the way that they did, was a masterstroke!!!

Psych is watchable thanks to its Twin Peaks flavored ep!!

Carrie Fisher’s darling one-woman autobiographical show Wishful Drinking was so so entertaining that we regret not seeing it on Broadway

The Hub is added to our cable line ups, and The Wonder Years re-enters our lives

– bestest re-discovery of a lost show from our
childhood: Robin of Sherwood

+ love the soundtrack by The Clannad!!!

Deep Roy is the only one truly standing tall on this season’s Eastbound

– the return of these forgetten kids!!! &
Kilborn (& Christine Lakin)

Rasta Monsta

a reason for Glee‘s being

– hotties Erin Kaplan, Isabel, the 2nd Mrs Draper, half face, & Lake Bell Torrance Coombs AND all the Tudors hottie hotness over the yearz

wait a second, did you LOOK AT THIS PAINTINGGGGG????????????????????????????????????


Regarding Henry The VIII
Is Never Enough

After 38 delicious episodes, spread out over four regal 4 seasons, and containing more spread legs than a Busby Berkeley production number, The Tudors reign has finally come to an end (for the second time!).  we salute you teamy dreamy Tudors, for you far superior infotainment and endless JO matz [NSFW], which never really seem to catch on to a humongous audience like it should have.  if you didn’t catch on, it’s truly yer loss, cause nuttin beats the combo of history and boobs, well, besides water and boobs.  for no better reason than to show some pics of hot chicks in corsets and crazy hood ornaments, we decided to rank Henry VIII’s six TV wives in order of royal thighness best/breastness to wurst/dogfacednessness.  enjoy

1)  Anne Boleyn | Natalie Dormer

she was crazy… crazy sexy foxy!!!  and made King Henry do things he probably shouldn’t have, but she did give us Queen Elizabeth the I, and gave I, calluses on my hand.  is ‘Dormer’ Spanish for ‘to give boners’?

2) Jane Seymour | Annabelle Wallis

Henry found a perfect wife in Jane, as she was mad slammin’, and in turn gave him what he always wanted: a BJ every 20 minutes a male heir. she was originally played in season 2 by the fetching Anita Briem, but was replaced by the even more fetch f fetching Annarungmybelle bangagainstaWallis

3) Catherine Parr | Joely Richardson

dearly departed Natasha Richardson was always the family hottie, leaving sis Joely solely in the background, but that doesn’t mean for a second that her talents aint on PARR with any other actress out there.  she brought humility to Henry’s court, without baring any breasts.  sometimes hotness doesn’t need to disrobe.  shocking, but true!

4) Katherine Howard | Tamzin Merchant

Katherine Howard was a floozy, and Tamzin Merhcant-Ivory played her as such.  she kinda looks like she’s 12 and she kinda doesn’t look so hot in our book, at least when compared to her lover Thomas Culppeps

5) Anne of Cleves | Joss Stone

Jossy done did well in her thankless role as the wife of Henry that he agreed to marry without ever meeting.  turns out she didn’t turn him on.  guess he thought the ‘Cleves’ in her name meant ‘totally wicked set of cleavage’.  if the internets were around in Anne’s time, there woulda been a search engine called ‘Ask Cleves’

6) Queen Katherine of Aragon |Maria Doyle Kennedy

Henry had every right to dump her frumpy a$$ for Anne Bone-lynn, although the fruit of their union, daughter Mary (Sarah Bolger), was the mos adorable character in the series

honorable non-Queen hotness/mentions: Anne Stanhope, Brigitte Rousselot, Princess Margaret Tudor, Lady Jane Howard, Ursula Misseldon and Lady Elizabeth Darrell, who had THE single greatest NSFW moment of the entire series, where a dude was feeling her up against a tree, and then, for the sake/benefit of the audience, turned her nekkid body towards the camera.  gawd save the King, and gawd bless The Tudors

1 Comment

Jonathan Rhysed Lightnin

only one more episode of The Tudors remains (sniff sniff)

lettuce hope it goes out with a BANG!!

Selma Brook, as the nude French chick [NSFW]


On With His Head!!!

we’re totally gay for

Torrance Coombs and his baby blues
as seen on Season 4 of The Tudors

and if you want to keep it straight, feast yer eyes on Coombs getting down and NSFW dirty with some royal biznatches

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