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10 Years A Thigh Master

it started with this*

post 1

*site didn’t look exactly like that on day 1, but it’s close!

 

and it ended with….

well, it hasn’t ended.  hasn’t it not is no?

you still here?

am I still here?

why are we all still here?

damn.  I knew I should have sold this site to Lycos back in 2005

anywho, here’s to 10 years of gawdknows what

 

one year old and still no pubes!
Year One 

 

u know how i feel about the side boob

first ever full movie review

two of my favorite things: Nap Pole and my Roscoe's tee

I hear there’s rumors on the internets

alba butt

faces only pugsly could love 

numanuma

they call me Ty, as in Cobb

does it get any better than this?

mischa, let me be your atreyu and ride you all night long

no sax before a fight

all women love facial hair.  if they say they don’t, they're lying and their vaginas are mad hairy

that's just not right 

 

cuthbest side

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Year Two

 

http://thighswideshut.org/images/gifs/handdryer.gif

http://thighswideshut.org/images/dakota/dakotascreamopen.jpg

yourethemannowdog / niggastolemybike / dosstolemybike / whatiscosby 

juss in case u didnt hear it the first 13 times, i am so fucking into u 

The latest 50 images posted to Live Journal

ha, it sez porn on the cob 

 

 

alba

http://thighswideshut.org/images/mischa/mischacannedance.jpg 

http://thighswideshut.org/images/banner/banner1009.jpg 

 

http://thighswideshut.org/images/photoshop/ted_koppel_feel.jpg

 

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Year 3

 

 

 

 

Wonder Faps

 

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Year 4

 

Let It Cosby

 

1.21 Gigawatts (Redux)

 

  

 

 

 

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Year 5

 

 



 

 


 

 

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Year 6

 

 

 

 

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Year 7

 

 

 

 

 

Plinkett’s Star Warsrapes/reviews

 

 

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Year 8

INTERNET K-HOLE

 


 

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Year 9

Merchandising Is Forever

lena3

THIGHS WIDE SHIRTS!!!!

 

 

 

 

WB-Logo-4 

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Year 10

Jerry Colonna

Emile Vrijman

ZZcar-rev 

ash moscow 

Limitless Paper In A Paperless World

btown_macbrown

grammy eats

tb huddle

future stairs

me utz

client list pies

rod_ed_blatchford

onion nuggets 2 

The-Fall

carrie ocean 

JFGay-edit 

lego spaceman

Malick-Profile-3Malick-Profile-2

gold arms

frozen-g-bAB 

jonestown bullet 4

 

WTC DANCE

the two keiths

naked_grandma_feud

me and my honey

McDolands-1978-b

Tyler-Clippard

spacecamp pyramid

franco-so-good-edit2
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if you got this far, bless you, and thank you.  you ship of reader means the world to me

 

and thanks to Popeyes, Zodiac, Zardoz, Andy Rooney, Kubrick, Hitchcock, CBS Sunday Morning, Star Wars, Saul Bass, gifs, boobs, gifs of Meg White’s boobs, the kid, Becker, Wonderyak, My Man Marvkus and his face, Lily Allen, Grambo, Peabs, Golden Fiddler, Grahamorama, Ms Modern Age, ProductshopNYC, Ultragrrrrl, Brooklyn Vegan, Justin Don’t Link This, the original Egotastic, Skeet on Mischa, Pinky Trent, WizzNutzz, DC Sports Bog, Tom Welling(ton): WORLD’S GREATEST ACTOR, Kid Kadoji, Spakula, Jewanicure, Nipsy Newbsy, Joe E Tata, BJNewms, The Thinker, my parents, my family, my Sara, and everyone with mustaches round this good world.  stay 4 real, 5 reals, 9 reals

HERE’S TO THE NEXT THOUSANDS YEARS OF THIGHS WIDE SHUT!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

4 Comments

Boo Who

Peace The Forks Out

to

The Ancient Booer

 

boo

booooooooooooooooo

boooooooo

ancient boo

ancient booer

dude, the Ancient Booer from The Princess Bride had to be one of THE scariest things EVER (from my childhood), alongside such reverse-boner scary beyond scariness as Large Marge in Pee Wee’s, everything in Poltergeist, and the thought that they’d ever cancel Hey Dude  

 

Bless you Margery Mason, for you done did your job well, and then some, and actually lived to be ancient!  She lived to be 100!!!!!!!  It’s totally boo that she didn’t live to be 200.  BOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO

0 Comments

The 2013 Thighsmans

we pricked the breastest movies of the beastest of the 2013

and now, for the only awards that matter…

Judi Den10th Anal Thighs Wide Movie Awards

aka

THE THIGHSMANS!!!

_

 

The Death To Smoochy Würstest Picture AND The Gus van Sant Most Pretentious Pig Sh!t Film of the Year!!!!!

upstream-color-sucks

Upstream Color

dishonrable mentions for these movies for also sucking a$$ and making me really angry that they eggist

This Is The End & Don Jon & The Book Thief & The Bling Ring & Gangster Squad & I’m So Excited & Katsnooze II

_

 

Batsh!ttiest Un-Sh!tty Crazy/Beautiful Performances of The Year

leo and cate

Leo & Cate

in Wolf & Jasmine

_

 

The 4th Annual Greta Grrr Wig Recipient of The OK This Joke/Career Muss Be Stopped Now Award

jay-barachel-wig

Jay Baruchel

we get it, you’re scrawny, Canadian and have a dumb voice.  now go away and take Seth Rogen with you

_

 

Always Bet On These Lil Shirley Temple Black (& White) Children

joey king droog2

 / Joey King

and the würst

Nico Liersch

_

 

The Samuel L Jackson Never Met A Script He Didn’t Like Guy of The Year

 samuel l jackson james franco

James Franco

who had 8+ flix released in 2013!!

_

 

Gifs of the Gawds

growl

Wolf-Leo-Dance-c

Alice Eve Trek

look-at-me

Franco-Spring2

Penn-Finger

 

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Hairing Is Caring

cumberassange

Cumberbatch’s Assange hair

tied for 2nd – everyone’s Hustle hair

tied for 3rd – the MUST-staches of Dallas Buyers Club

_

 

Würstest Date Movie of 2013

12 years a gif

12 years a gif2

12 Years A Snooze

alternatively

würstest Dates IN a movie

any of the ones involving humans in Her

_

 

Bob’s Big Girls – The Bobbies!

bobbies gatsby

anything & everything in Gatsby +8 other winners!

_

 

The KFC Finger Stickin’ Goodness Goodie Three Shoes Award

hudgens lick

anything Vanessa Hudgens is doing in Spring Breakers

Margot Robbie makes us howl in Wolf [NSFW]

anything in Blue Is The Warmest Color (although we didn’t see it) [NSFW]

Lindsay Lohan’s cannons in The Canyons [NSFW]

Rosario Dawson puts us in a JO Trance [NSFW]

the revealing photos of Bettie Page in Bettie Page Reveals All [NSFW]

Leo’s butt candle

and the leastest…

her and his in the dark orgasms in Her

+

the sexification of Amy Adams in Hustle

amy adams boobs hustle

juss stop it.  she’s too nice to be sexy

_

 

Mish-Mash-Up of The Year

Oz Breakers by ME!!!

_

 

Eyes Wide Open For Bidness 9ever

aka Bestest Eyes

Justine Lupe!!!!

 in Frances Ha

runner-up - Blanca Suárez

_

 

Most Ablixaiest Ablixa

ablixa zeta

Ablixa in Side Effects

_

 

Face Timeless

Emile Vrijman

Dutch lawyer Emile Vrijman‘s face

seen in The Armstrong Lie

 _

 

Josh Baskin’ In These Sunny Miscellaneous Missile Missives That Are Da Bomb Shiz!

ash moscow

the only bitched @ swirth that matters!!!!!!!

AMC’s POOFY COMFY LEATHER RECLINING CHAIRS AT THE MOVIES!!!!!! 

the Her his line

the VFX of Gatsby

 Kellan Lutz IS orc Bolg

JD Salinger’s son was in Revenge of The Nerds!

David Cross has played both Allen Ginsburg AND his father

THOSE CRAZY SEXY COOL NASA’S SPACE COLONY ART THINGS FROM THE 1970S COME TO LIFE IN the so-so Elysium!!!

the awesomeness that is SpaceCamp!

leaf jinx

the Death Star’s laser control room still exists!!!

Matt Zoller Seitz became like the new Jesus and we still have zero idea who he is

1933 was an incredible year for movies

that picture of Terrence Malick

this picture of Terrence Malick

the cameos of Harmony Korine

Picnic at Hanging Rock is crazed!!!!!

Danny Lloyd Torrance Lives!!!

Batman (1989)’s Flugelheim Museum

+

we still gay for JFGay

JFGay-edit

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Songs That Execute Butter Than Norman Mailer’s Bong & Chong

mailer and chong

‘Ordinary Love’ from the Mandela movie

Mayssa Karaa’s arabic rendtion of ‘White Rabbit’

‘Scary Monsters And Nice Sprites’ by Skrillex in Spring Breakers

Mike Patton’s haunting piano in Pines

&

the abso abso abso lute würstest be…

‘The Blue Umbrella Suite’ featuring Sarah Jaffe

_

 

Trailers Worth Tractoring

(in endless memory of Robert ‘Tractor’ Traylor)

 tractor-trailor

_

 

Poster Her! Poster We! Poster Haste!

Posters-2013 

+ 

 the würst

& the würrstetst

& twinsies würsteresteserteestsers!!!

_

Unintentional Porn To Be Wild Titles

inside llewyn davis

A Good Day to Die HardThe PurgeMy Little Pony: Equestria GirlsThe To Do ListThe CanyonsJobsInside Llewyn DavisOut of the Furnace

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Fenella Woolgar Bestest Names Award

fenella

June Squibb / Raphaël Personnaz / Topsy Chapman

_

 

Movies To Look For In The ’014

WWZZTop

World War ZZ Topps

The Haunting in Connecticut 3: Ghosts of Miami of Ohio

The Even Greater Gatsby

Othello (based off of the board game)

Korben Dallas Buyers Club

13 Years A Slave

13 Fast, 13 Furious

_

 

In Memoriam

shirley temple spells

Temple of the Smile

+

O’Toole & Fontaine & Phil Sey Mo & Ramis & Sid & Paul Walker & Mrs Peacock & Dennis F%&king Farina & The Albino from P-Bride & Gandolfini & stop motion sick-ness & Ebert

&

Mr LittleJeans / Pagoda

pagoda

_

 

don’t forget to peep out our ’12, ’11’10’09’08’07’06’05’04’03, and ’02 awards!! 

if you got this far, pat yourself on the back, then yer balls

until next thyme the balcony is clothed…

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