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April Rain

I’m ashamed to admit it – but last night was the first time I had ever seen Purple Rain

and to my surprise – it was an incredible movie!!!

here’s why…

(and we don’t even need to list the music as a reason)

 

Apollonia’s treasure chest and ASSets

appzz

appzz openm

appa

apps pricne

app touch

purple rain barn

appss

although she does look a bit like Tim Curry as Dr Frank-N-Furter in The Rocky Horror Picture Show

the way Morris Day moves, and his eyes pop

morris mirror

morris moves

morris day appolonia

morris slides

morris slaps

morris day moves

morssi slick

morris bird

dumpster

that motorcycle is mad RAD!!!

prince bikes

motorcycle

and the movie has a sorta Batman feel to it!!

batgirl prince

there’s a dark city, lots of smoke, good guys, bad guys and some of them wear capes!

The MUSTaches

prince purple stache

morris day

Clarence Williams III

billy spakrs

brown mack

Jesse Johnson

jermoe

bobby z

a woman gets tossed in a dumpster!!

dumpster prince

which ends up being the least harshest thing that happens to a woman in this movie

the editing is amazing – and the cinematography too – and the make-up also also!!

purp2 purp

the guy who played the bouncer was also Prince’s real-life bodyguard!

prince chick

prince bodyguard

chez chick purple

pruince bdy

Charles ‘Big Chick’ Huntsberry

this guy and his nods of approval

that guy

Prince being Prince

prince danncnce

prince hair

prince finmgers

prince hair look

prince smile

prince get up

prince momey

prince monkey

monkey prince

prince kiss

prince smile 2

 

thank you Prince

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Woods You Rather?

The Witch
Fraught Pilgrims vs the World
Official Website | Trailers & Mo
R | 92 min

the witch

Somewhere between The Crucible and The Village (and The Wicker Man) lives Robert EggersThe Witch – a quiet creeper that will have you shying away from the woods, and goats, and time traveling back to a time in American history where pilgrims prided themselves on their own pride

This story is about a pilgrim family, expelled from a pilgrim colony, and forced to make it on their own in the New England wilderness of the 17th century (that’s the 1600s, for those knot in the know).  The family doesn’t have much beyond themselves and prayer.  There’s a father (Ralph Ineson, better known as The Office‘s Finchy) whose trying to keep his family afloat (and somehow builds an entire house on his own… although the building of said house is not shown in the movie), a wife (Kate Dickie) who doesn’t seem to do too much, outside of birthing kids and yelling at them, and… a bunch of kids.  The one kid doing most of the stuff around the household (Anya Taylor-Joy) lets the one thing happen that never should have – as she was caring for her baby brother – BOOM – the baby disappears!!  Where did the baby go?  Was it snatched up by a wolf?  A witch?  A wolfwitch? A chipwich?????

This is where things get quieter and creepier – and where our family members start venturing into the woods, when you know they shouldn’t go anywhere near it.  More bad things happen, again, and again, and family members start to get possessed, and then they start turning on one another.  More bad things happen, and then things go even quieter, and even creepier, and BOOM – the movie ends

What happened?  What’s up with that woman who looks like the woman from the Shining bathtub?  Why does this feel like an M Night Shamalalaananan movie (the good kind, like he used to make)?  Who would want to leave their country and live in the middle of nowhere of a new country?  How is Finchy not in every movie???  You might have the same questions, or form your own, but The Witch won’t answer any of them – it will juss A and B-witch you from start to finish!!!

Ode To JoyAnya T-Joy is one to watch (and gawk at!)

anya-taylor-joy

VerdictgoJeepers Worth A Creepers

Witch is boom and vroooooooom at a theater near jews

and until next thyme the balcony is clothed…

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88th Keyed

the 88th Oscars waz a doozy, and a floozy.  here’s what truly won and lost…

Winners

Tracy Morgan IS The Danish Girl (who isn’t)

Tom Hardy’s wife – Charlotte Riley’s chest

hardy wife

hardy wife oscars

hardy riley

hardy riley2

the calm and coolness that is Mark Ruffalo and his wink

ruffalo wink

the return of Ali G  

and how wife Isla Fisher snuck in the costume

how they let the ‘Sound Editing’ and ‘Sound Mixing’ categories explain themselves with… sound!!!

Jacob Tremblay has arrived!! (with his parents)

jacob parents

Academy President Cheryl Boone Isaacs‘ sexy-smart glasses

isaacs glasses

Girl Scout cookies!
girl scout cookies

Ashley Graham – is BREAST dressed of the night!

ash graham oscars

ashley graham oscars

Losers

any chance of Clueless being celebrated at future Academy Awards.  poor Stacey Dash

stacey dash

Mad Max‘s costume designer and Oscar winner, Jenny Beavan, can’t dress herself, and no one claps for her

jenny beavan oscars

Sofía Vergara renaming Son of Saul – Son of Saauuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuul

white people, Asian people, Hispanic people, Indian people, Native American people.  they all matter, cause every person matters!

this can all be solved by letting Kumail Nanjiani (and white person Kate McKinnon) host next year!

Zodiac – it was also about journalism too (better than Spotlight), and it’s the best movie of the 21st century, and it still has zero Oscar wins or even nominations

Mark Rylance‘s hair AND his dumb hat

rylanxce

rylance dumb hat

all the people who died and got zero love for dying – Abe VigodaDick Van Patten / Anne Meara Patrick Macnee / Jason Voorhees’ mom Stand By Me‘s Milo Pressman / Ron Moody (was nominated for an Oscar for fcuks sake) / the guy who played Leaterface / Louis Jourdan / Taylor Negron / Amanda Peterson / Mary Ellen Trainor / Uggie / Mr Deltoid 

NoTime

(see our ‘In Memoriam’ area for love) 

 

better suck next year

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Police Academy Awards

woah – Officer Debbie Callahan (Leslie Easterbrook) from Police Academy sang the National Anthem at Super Bowl XVII!!!

bless you Callahan!!

easterbrook police academy

callahan 3

Leslie_Easterbrook_Police_Academy_5

eastbrooki police

callahan pi9n

callahan

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