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The 2016 Thighsmans

we named the breastest movies of the beastest of the 2016

and now, for the only awards that matter…

Thirstweenth Anal Thighs Wide Movie Awards

aka

THE THIGHSMANS!!!

_

Crap To The Future Award For Würstest Acting of The Year Award!!!

nick-kroll-back-to-the-future-ii

Nick Kroll 

in Loving

he somehow molded his character and acting style based on the ‘I think he stole his wallet‘ guy from Back To The Future II  – Lester!  WTF???

_

The 7th Annual Greta Grrr Wig Recipient of The OK, You Are Not An Actress And Should Stop Pretending To Be One So Please Stop Being An Actress Now Award

go away

Olivia Munn

The OK, That Awkward Tuna-Salad Lips, Keeping Your Head Down, and Then Picking Your Head Up Thing That You Do In Every Movie Muss Be Stopped Forever Award

stop it 

Eddie Redmayne

no seriously, stop it with those dumb lips of yours
and that face thing you do

_

The Samuel L Jackson
Never Met A Script
He Didn’t Like
Man of The Year

 

Danny Glover

who had EIGHT flix released in 2016!!

_ 

Gifs of the Gawds

doctor-strange

folding buildings in Doctor Strange!

(better than anything Chis Nolan can do!)

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Hairing Is Caring

ekhart-shave-foxctahcer

Aaron Eckhart and his partially Ruffalo-Foxcatchered  shaved forehead in Bleed For This!

runner up – his and Hank’s Sully staches!!!

_

Bob’s Big Girls
aka
The 2016 Bobbies!

these bobbies are darin!

_ 

The KFC Finger Stickin’ Goodness Goodie Three Shoes Award

aka – these ladies be DAMN fine award!!

Emayatzy Corinealdi

Emayatzy Corinealdi miles

&

I bleed for Christine Evangelista

christine-evangelista-4

and you would too if you saw her in NSFW action

 

 

bisous for Ingrid Bisu

&

heaven and hot water
for this hot tamale!

mel-paps

&

the b-witch-ing Anya Taylor-Joy

anya-taylor-joy

&

Emily Beecham

Emily Beecham

&

Mon Mothma, before she was!!

&

Fast Times glamour shots

ca. August 1983 --- Actresses Jennifer Jason Leigh (front) and Phoebe Cates played the unforgettable roles of Stacy Hamilton and Linda Barrett, respectively, in the 1982 classic . --- Image by © Douglas Kirkland/CORBIS

&

leather boobs

grey sophie tuener

&

these headshots

hemsworth ghostbusters

 

the nottiest nottie of the year

ugly stoopid aline

whatever the fcuk this alien is.  WTF ARE YOU ???

+

them crazy fat crazy naked chicks in Nocturnal Animals that you should be happy I don’t have gifs for (yet)

_

Eyes Wide Open For Bidness 9ever

aka Bestest Eyes

palmer-eyes

 Teresa Palmer

 in Hacksaw Jim Duggan

runner up – Natasha Bassett 

Natasha Bassett eyes

in Fail Caesar!

_

The Nosey Nose That Knowse Bestest!

aka Bestest Nose!

jenna coleman 3

 Jenna Coleman

 in Me Before You

_

Würstest Date Movie/Snoozefest
of 2016

Snoozechester By The Snoozefest

_

Best Boys On The Side Players

THIS GUY in Love & Friendship

&

THIS GUY who was a Star Wars extra

john chapman

 and tells his tales in the great Elstree 1976

_

Songs That Execute Better Than Norman Mailer Does As Norman Bates

norman-bates-mailer

OMG – that La La Land soundtrack

20th Century Women‘s tunes!

‘Sabotage’ in Star Trek (which seemed so wrong in the trailer, but was so right in the movie!)

Keanu‘s love of George Michael

+

Toni Toni Toni’s daughter

_

Trailers Worth Tractoring

(in endless memory of Robert ‘Tractor’ Traylor)

 traylor-tractor-gif

_

Poster Her! Poster We! Poster Haste!

_

Unintentional Porn To Be Wild Titles

Max Steel /  Pete’s Dragon / Bad Moms / Midnight Special / Everybody Wants Some!! / No Pay, Nudity / The BFG

_

Fenella Woolgar
Bestest Names Award

King Baggot

& Rags Ragland

& Chill Wills

_

Don’t You Forget About Me/These Forgetmenot Bon Mots

the best movie from some other year I saw this year

toynbee

Pee-Wee’s Big Adventure is STILL as amazing AS Amazing Larry is + tons of tidbits!!

amazing larry mario pee wee

Annelies van Overbeek

alfredo-jimmy-sewart

Martin Short’s wedding coordinator character from Father of The Bride – Franck – IS BASED OFF OF A REAL HUMAN BEING!!!

dr-pepper-halloween

when New York City’s in trouble – who you gonna call? Pat Kiernan!!!!!!!!!!!!!

edward-g-ten

So Tell Me Again, Why Did You Have To Die? Part VI

fosters taxi cdriver

seeing Purple Rain for the first time, with an audience that cars

money pit money

RICHARD SIMMONS (may have) PLAYED A FAT GUY IN FELLINI’S SATYRICON!!!!!!!!

freedie darth

woah – Officer Debbie Callahan (Leslie Easterbrook) from Police Academy sang the National Anthem at Super Bowl XVII!!!

the lerners

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Movies To Look For In The ‘017

 

Bossk To The Future – A Star Wars Story

Wild Breasts & Where To Find Them

The Detergent Series: PureX

Some Marvel Super Hero Movie
I Could Give 2 Fcuks About

Hacksaw Jim Duggan’s Ridge

Oscar Mike Golf

Bridget Jones’s Farts

Billy Lynn’s Short 20-Second Timeout Walk

16 Fast, 16 Furious

_

In Memoriam

gene yellow

hans gruber

duke oscar

garry happy days

gary coleman nancy

loggia

curtis-la

gaynes po0loice

kenny 2d

&

the man who said…

its a trap 

&

the guy that gave us this

_

don’t forget to peep out our  ’15’14, ’13, ’12, ’11’10’09’08’07’06’05’04’03, and ’02 awards!! 

how are you still reading this?  and how are you still a fan of this website??  WHO ARE YOU??!??!

until next thyme the balcony is clothed…

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Thanks For The Memcories

Memco was the East Coast version of the department store Gemco

until the company went kaput in 1986

but the buildings live on!

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Life As We Snow It

Mario Carosa cleans snow from his windshield in Brooklyn today, February 2, 1962

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