The Favourite
Powdered Go NUTS!
Official Site | Trailers & Mo
R | 121 min

We keep wanting someone to be out next Stanley Kubrick, and while some push and argue for David Fincher or Christopher Nolan to be that guy, I think people are overlooking the work and genius that is Yorgos Lanthimos, as he’s the best heir to the throne!

His Dogtooth was a revelation.  The Lobster wasn’t perfect, but we haven’t escaped its claws either and are still thinking about it years later.  The Killing of a Sacred Deer?  Oh deer!!!!!!!!!!!

And his latest, the first he didn’t have a hand in writing – The Favourite?  It’s like Barry Lyndon trapped in The Overlook Hotel, and that’s a wonderful wonderful wonderful thing.  And if you’ve found Lanthimos’ other work to be way too bleak and hard to handle, this may suit your pansy-self a lot better, you pantsy pansy you!

Corseted Emma Stone and Rachel Weisz deliciously duel each other for the love and attention of Queen Anne (a maddeningly magnificent Olivia Colman).  There is not a single non-tense moment in the film – it’s like watching one long-ass fuse burn and burn and burn, as we wait for the dynamite to explode.  Along the way in this power play, we also get a cadre of powdered up men (Nicholas Hoult, Mr. Taylor Swift, James Smith, and Mark Gatiss) doing their own fun scheming and conniving.  If you have a back in this movie, it will get stabbed.  

Screw Jane Austen – cause Lanthimos’ court jesting is more aligned to my nutty senses and sensibilities!

Verdictgo: Breast In Show

Favourite compels U in NY/LA today and elsewhere elsewhen

and until next thyme the balcony is clothed…

Battle of The Sexes
Net Gain
Official Site | Trailer & Mo
PG-13 | 121 min

There’s a lot of good and goodness in the Jonathan Dayton and Valerie Faris‘ movie take on the event and events that led up to the infamous 1973 Battle of the Sexes tennis match between old man Bobby Riggs and young Billie Jean King.  You will laugh!  You will cheer!  You will love all the wigs and false teeth (well, maybe not as much as I did)!  And when it’s over, you’ll be like, oh, that WAS nice.  Women had it tough, and they still do!  My, how times have changed, but they really haven’t!  

But you won’t be like, oh man, that was the greatest movie I’ve ever seen about tennis (Strangers On A Train? Match Point?)

But you will go, man, Steve Carell is so good at being funny AND dramatic AND being so real!  To me, he’s having the serious career that Jim Carrey should have had!  Oh man, Jim Carrey, why don’t you have like 11 Oscars already!?!??!

And when you see Emma Stone in Billie Jean’s genes, you’ll be like, OMG, I totally want to bang Emma Stone as Billie Jean King!!!!  And when you see this hairdressing scene where a hairdresser (Andrea Riseborough) runs her hands thru Emma Jean King’s hair and they make eye-bally faces at one another, you’ll be like – HOLY FCUK, I juss creamed myself watching this hairdressing scene!!!  It’s like the hottiest hairdressing scene EVER!!!! (granted, we’ve never seen Shampoo, but it’s probably hotter than anything in it)

Come for the tennis, and then literally COME watching this hairdressing scene!!!

Verdictgo: Jeepers Worth A Peepers

Sexes is game, set, snatch in limited release this Friday, and at a theater near jews and white nationalists on September 29th

and until next thyme the balcony is clothed…

Isabelle Huppert

Ruth Negga

Natalie Portman

Emma Stone

Meryl Streep

La La Land
Gosmancing The Stone
Official Site | Trailer & Mo
PG-13 | 128 min

You can have your Manchester By The Snoozes, I’ll have what Damien Chazelle is serving in La La Land – life, love, and the pursuit of making movies magical and fun again!

I hope you saw Damien’s Whiplash.  It’s like La La Land, but painful!  Pain is good, and usually makes for a better movie (and in this case, that is true, and in the case of Manchester By The Sea, it’s false), but pleasure is also important, and La La Land is a delectable slice of pleasure!

There is no current screen pairing more pleasureful than the screen pairing of Ryan Gosling and Emma Stone.  They made Crazy, Stupid, Love, not so stupid, and rather lovely!  They made for a welcome distraction in the distracting piece of garbage that was Gangster Squad.  In La La Land, they make us go ga ga for even more Gostone/Stonling pairings.  I’ve said it before, and I’ll say it again – they need to never stop making Gosling-Stone movies.  Never.  They, being Hollywood, really should(n’t). Is there anyone out there that would disagree with such a statement?  Is there anyone out there in general still reading this site?  Gawd, are you there? It’s me, Margaret!

La La Land was a musical, but it didn’t really need all the jazz hands and songs and dances.  I mean, they were nice and all, but they could make a silent movie where Gosling and Stone work in a poop factory and we’d still fall in love with them.  Hmmm, I have a great idea for their next film – POOP FACTORY: A LOVE STORY!

Verdictgo: Jeepers Mos Def Worth A Peepers

La La already Landed at a theater near jews AND white nationalists

and until next thyme the balcony is clothed…

Birdman or (The Unexpected Virtue of Ignorance)
Breaking The Fifth Wall
Official Website | Trailers & Mo
R | 119 min

Alejandro González Iñárritu‘s Birdman is be like…

–

Michael Keaton is an actor who was once a superhero

and now is like nothing or something

&

a superhero kinda like Condorman

&

his daughter is Emma Stone

who’s like a strung out/sarcastic Daisy Duck

&

Keaton’s trying to put on a Broadway show
in hopes of reviving his career

but it kinda goes like The Producers
with Zach Galifianakis as the hybrid lovechild
of Zero Mostel & Gene Wilder

&

one of his costars is a jerky Ed Norton
who’s out to spoil all the fun
and steal the spotlight

(and Andrea Riseborough is kinda doing the same thing)

which makes it feel a little About Eve

&

the fragile Naomi Watts is about to break

&

all of it seems like one giant artistical battle
like totally like Black Swan yo!

but not nearly as freaky or freakin awesome

&

but its got shades of the creative long-take editing of
Hitch’s BRILLIANT Rope

&

the even more creative and longer takes of
Alfonso Cuaron’s BRILLIANT Children of Men

&

luckily Amy Ryan is our center of gravity
and source of comfort

so what does it all add up to? an interesting movie with great technique, with a story that kinda grows old after an hour

glad to see Keaton back in action, but Oscars??? psssshah – this aint no Bettlejuice, or even Johnny Dangerously, so if he wins this year, it’s a make-up call for not winning for them roles

Verdictgo: Jeepers Worth A Peepers

Birdman is fly enuff in limited release

and until next thyme the balcony is clothed…