Tag Archives: The Hobbit: An Unexpected Journey

Yes, Know, Maybe So

32nd Annual Rock and Roll Hall of Fame Induction Ceremony
Barclays Center
April 7th

There have been 32 Rock and Roll Hall of Fame Induction Ceremonies, and I’ve sadly only attended three of them.  For a long time, they weren’t open to the public, and were held in either Cleveland or the Waldorf-Astoria Hotel only for industry people  

As soon as they did open them to the public, and in my neck of the woods – starting with the 2014 show – I HAD to be there.  Somehow the demand wasn’t as high with the 2016 show (guess Cheap Trick as a headliner didn’t do the trick), and I somehow snagged a pair of tickets for a paltry $26.06!!!

For the 2017 show, I knew that that would not be the case, with Pearl Jam and Journey getting in, who both have strong fan bases that would just have to be there.  I had to be there too, no matter what.  I’d go even if the inductees were the now eligible Spin Doctors, EMF, Letters To Cleo, Color Me Badd, and Right Said Fred!!  (come to think of it – I’d actually love to see a concert of all those bands together!!!)

E.L.O.

Last year’s show led off with a David Bowie tribute, and so of course an obvious Chuck Berry one was due this year, and of course, the obvious choice to kick things off was E.L.O. and their outer-spaced out version of his ‘Roll Over Beethoven’, and of course, that is what happened, and of course it rocked.  I know it would, having been lucky enough to see Mr Jeff Lynne and his orchestra do that song + ‘Evil Woman’ and ‘Mr Blue Sky’ this past September, like he totally rocked them again this night  

E.L.O. is a well deserved entry into the Hall, although I strongly feel that Lynne’s other project – The Traveling Wilburys – deserve a place there too.  Mainly cause I want him to reunite with Dylan and Petty (and maybe get George Harrison’s son Dhani, who inducted E.L.O., plus someone else to stand in for Roy Orbison) and play the songs they NEVER toured, EVER

Joan Baez

I know Joan Baez, but if you asked me to name her 5 most famous songs, I’d probably not even get to 2.  Yikes, but I know she’s important, and while not the most rockiniest choice for the Hall, a vital one nonetheless.  And with today’s politically charged climate (although seriously, what day and age’s climate is NOT politically charged), Joan brought a taste of injustice and protest from times past to the present, playing ‘Swing Low, Sweet Chariot’ + brought out Mary Chapin Carpenter and The Indigo Girls to strum ‘Deportee (Plane Wreck at Los Gatos)’ and ‘The Night They Drove Old Dixie Down’.  I’m all for her making a statement, but I would have preferred a little more rockin – like her cover of ‘House of The Rising Sun’ (if you can call that ‘rockin’)

Yes

One of THE best things about the Rock Hall inductions is the once in a lifetime reunions AND collaborations, and the band Yes, gave both of those an emphatic YES!!!  The band has had many many many formations in its history, and currently tour the world in two different factions, but on this night, they didn’t come from a place of ‘no’, and all came together to say ‘yes’ to Yes!!!  And superfan Geddy Lee (and Rush bandmater Alex Lifeson) as the inductor, not only had high praise for the group, but filled in admirably for the departed Chris Squire on ‘Roundabout’.  The long song only allowed for a second tune, the 80s staple ‘Owner of a Lonely Heart’

https://www.instagram.com/p/BSnF4W0jQfi/

Tupac

You’d think that a posthumous induction would not be all that great, but you’d be DEAD wrong.  Poor wording, but totally true.  The Kurt-less Nirvava performance was one of the most bestest things I have ever witnessed, musically.  When Linda Ronstadt (who is not dead) missed her induction 3 years ago, the performance put on in her honor was udderly fantastic.  Same was true for Tupac’s big night.  I missed the Snoop Dog speech while taking an extended wizz, and didn’t really know all the songs in the medley, but what a medley it was…

Ambitionz az a Ridah / I Get Around / I Ain’t Mad at Cha / Dear Mama / Changes (see below) / 2 of Amerikaz Most Wanted / Gangsta Party / Hail Mary / Keep Ya Head Up

all with the help of Alicia Keys, YG, TI, Treach from Naughty By Nature, and of course the Snoop man himself!

No hologram needed – as 2Pac’s music brought him back to life!

Journey

The night’s most memorable moment was the one that didn’t happen.  Steve Perry joined his former bandmates on stage for a heartfelt reunion that didn’t continue into the post-speech performances, leaving everyone VERY happy to see him, but VERY sad that we didn’t really get to hear him (sing)

Steve Perry can do whatever Steve Perry wants to do.  If he wants to accept an award and not play with Journey ever again, that’s his choice, but in choosing to not perform (perhaps for the last time and chance ever to do so… but never say ever), he denied the audience, the fans, and humanity the opportunity to witness perhaps THE music moment of the decade  

It may be time to stop believing in a Steve Perry reunion, but with current frontman Arnel Pineda perfectly imitating his chops, there’s plenty to lick and believe in here.  Pineda & co rocked the arena and our world with ‘Separate Ways (Worlds Apart), ‘Lights’ and ‘Don’t Stop Believin’

Pharrell Williams then inducted Nile Rodgers with the Award For Musical Excellence, but sadly Daft Punk did not show up to make us all ‘Get Lucky’

this was followed to a nice, but not anything super special Lenny Kravitz tribute to Prince, featuring ‘When Doves Cry’ and ‘The Cross’.  Prince should never not be memorialized and honored, but I feel a little Prince-tributed out.  Maybe they could have done a nice Leonard Cohen tribute, and have all the 1284384288424842 people who have covered ‘Hallelujah’ play it all together as one

Pearl Jam

Save the best for last, and Pearl Jam did, bringing up the rear for this show.  While Neil Young called in sick, David Letterman came out of hiding and brought well needed non-musician humor and heart (and beard) to the proceedings 

Another lovely moment was the appearance and reunion with their original drummer Dave Krusen, who sit in with the band for ‘Alive’, for the first time since he departed the group in 1991(!!!!!)!  Personally, I would have let the group play Ten in its entirety, but they chose to sprinkle in other works, like ‘Given to Fly’ and ‘Better Man’  

The only other moment that would have been super epic, was the show’s all-star jam closing number ‘Rockin’ in the Free World’.  The jam WAS super epic, but without Neil Young, it was a little less super-y epic-er than it could have been.  But who cares!!!  When George Harrison’s son is jamming with Geddy Lee, Eddie VedderJonathan Cain and Neal Schon of Journey, and Trevor Rabin of Yes, you’ll take that over not taking that.  TAKE THAT!!  I will, thanks!  

Keep these shows a coming and a rocking Rock Hall, and especially to Brooklyn! and with more capes!!!!

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Shire On You Crazy Diamond

The Hobbit: An Unexpected Journey
High Un-Expectedations MET!
Official Website | Trailers & Mo
PG-13 | 169 min

no saggins here!!!

Who was the least cool & fun & awesome & interesting dude in that fellowship of them rings?  Easy answer – Gimli.  Nothing against Gimili, but dwarfs juss can’t compete with rugged & handsome Viggo, cutie shield surfing Orlando Bloom (who hasn’t gone on to do anything after LOTR), not so boring Boromir or those four Hobbits who are so fun that they may have actually invented fun.  So yeah, dwarfs are pretty much the bottom würst of Middle Earth.  Well, JRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRR Tolkien’s first book had one Hobbit and one Ian McKellen, and nothing else but dwarfs – 13 of them.  How exciting is 1 dwarf?  Not as less exciting as 13 of them.  Basically what wees sayings is – is it worth it to go there and back, again, from the Shire to everywhere else but the Shire, and with tons of dwarfs???  We were all burned by George Lucas and his prequels, and The Hobbit is basically barking up similar trees ents

Well, guess what, THE HOBBIT: AN UNEXPECTED JOURNEY DOES EGGZACTLY WHAT IT NEEDS TO!!!!!!!!!!!  While the story & stakes may not be as epic and sizzling as the stuffs going on in LOTR, the book is what it is (we actually read it!!!) and Peter Jackson executed it to the eggsalad cinematic level that you would expect him to delivery it to.  What he did was be like, hey, you loved LOTR so much, so why don’t we juss make The Hobbit the same way and stuff, but use much more awesome effects and more awesomer capture motion Gollum than you saw before (OMG!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!) + throw in stuff that wasn’t even in the book cause you people deserve to see Saruman’s beard and Cate Blanchett speak elvish.  WE DO!  WE DO!!!!!

And after about 55issssssh beginning minutes of meeting the 13 dwarfs and rolling one’s eyes and being like, damn, these dwarfs are so un-cool, something totally UNEXPECTED happens – you start loving these dwarfs, cause they is actually juss as cool and as funny and interesting and things as Viggo and Bloom and those Hobbits and Borosmear and his brother Unfairasmear!!!!!  GO DWARVFES!!!!!!!!!!!! And Richard Armitage as main dwarf Thorin is almos as rugged & handsome as Viggo is!!!!!!  IT’S KINDA SORTA REALLY ALMOST TRUE!!!  We’d do em both with yours AND ours (we’d also do Aidan Turner, who’s like a dwarfier Ian Somerhalder)!!  + Martin Freeman is a beyond perfect Bilbo.  He pretty much acts the same as he did as Tim on the original gangster Office, always has, always will, and guess what, that’s juss fine cause Martin Freeman IS THE FCUKING MAN!!!!!!!!!  Oh, did we mention that Ian McKellen is reprising his role as Gandalf?  Dude, we’d all camp out to watch a trilogy of McKellen as Gandalf taking a dump.  Don’t say you wouldn’t cause you would, you sick wizard pooping watching loving fcuker!!!

But isn’t this movie ass long?  People who worry about long ass runtimes should not go see movies.  You should stick yer iPad up yer a$$ and set the alarm to go off in 3 minutes or whatever your attention span is.  Honestly, we knew it was gonna be looong, but we wish it were longer!!!!  If you can sit thru 38938883283 hours of Lame of Thrones then you can sit thru almost 3 hours of The Hobbit, cause The Hobbit is 8w82181098213482ehjdb2rgh48dcb4bnnj44838f838f848484848`4h`4ufhnn3e248248248n2dn times better than Lame of Thrizz

And why did they turn this into 3 movies when I’m sure 2 would have been fine?  Oh, I’m sorry, do you want to anticipate shitty movies for the next 3 winters or do you want 3 FCUKING HOBBIT MOVIES FOR THE NEXT THREE WINTERS!!!!!!!!!!!???????????????????????????????????

Now what’s this stuff about 48 frames per second junk?  It’s like a normal movie but twice as much stuff in the same amount of seconds!  What does that mean, MORE STUFF!!!!  Well, what did it look like?  It makes everything look really clear (although any bits with motion looked like it was being fast-forwarded on your DVR.  it was strange, but maybe things are suppose to be fast and strange in the future of cinema).  Oh, so it doesn’t look like a normal movie?  Not one you’ve seen before, and since yer eyes and brain aren’t used to it, you might not like it at first, but over 169 minutes you ease into it (like you do with loving dwarfs!!) and the clarity becomes a welcome thing, considering there are so many other 3D and CGI heavy films that are so unclear looking.  Ever see Transformers?  Sh!t looks so blurry and muddled that our eyes and brain have quit on ever seeing any Transformers movie ever again. + you don’t wanna trust Peter Jackson?  OK, maybe you don’t after he post-LOTRed us with the who cares King Kong and the what was that unlovely Lovely Bones, BUT, when it comes to JRRRRRRRRRRRRRR Tolkien, in Jackson we trust AND thrust.  Spank the lord Guillermo del Taco didn’t direct this cause it woulda been filled with Spanish nymphs with dumb sh!t like hands with eyes and stuff

did we mention that Bret McKenzie is in it????????? he was in LOTR 1 & 3, but gets more to do here, and wait, Bret’s dad was in one of them too??????  oh, and this is still the best

Verdictgo: Peter Jackson + Tolkien =  Breast In Show

Hobbit‘s journey begins with one giant movie at a theater near jews this friday. if you wanna try out the 48fps stuff, here’s a list of US theaters fpsing out

and until next thyme the balcony is clothed…

oh, and, never 5get –

PSSUY FACE!!!!!!!!

Engrish Two Towers Subtitles

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