before you can see or do anything, one is forced
to watch the world’s creepiest propaganda film ever
somewhere Leni Riefenstahl is turning over in her grave, a grave that I pissed on!!!
but some propganda deserves mad props-a-grandeur!
the original ‘Oh Snap!’ -Jewanicure
even lezzies love Coke!
that’s how they talk in Irkutsk
now it’s off to the tasting room!!
American Coke Products
classic tastes, classic logos, juss so effin classic all around
EAT IT PEPSI!
Asian Coke Products
they all tasted like soy sauce
Latin America Coke Products
they all tasted like salsa
more like paraGAY
European Coke Products
we’d rather drink tuna juice than drink Beverly
African Coke Products
they all tasted like famine
Sunfill, Dijoubti for ‘mouthwash’
Dijboubti, English for ‘your booty’
man o man did our mouths tasted like awfuls afterwards
so gross! like mad gross! like too gross! like 288 and then some!
but it’s something you gotta do at least once
even if it’s overpriced
and even if that crapdubious propaganda film is
more disturbing than LVT’s Antichrist
Don’t worry bout a thing lil Sasha Cohen, my sweet tits breasts anus naked butt thighs nude vagina hot camel toe poon tang clan heroes in a half shell pics (sorry, that’s purely for Googling purposes), Michelle Kwan still blows
Is it 2010 yet?
Bestest actor who isn’t named Joseph Gordon-Levitt, yet has the bestest name: Burn Gorman. Where to catch em if you can: as that guy in Layer Cake and as Kenge and Carboys’ clouseauish clerk Guppy (another bestest name) from BBC’s Bleak House, which sadly will turn my house bleak wheneth it ends this Sunday on PBS. Seriously yo, I know it looks boring and stuff, like most things before 1950, but you should totally Netflix em when they are ready for Netflix. I mean, it don’t got much better than unsung underground secret future super hotness cuttie cute ness pie Carey Mulligan, dudes with crazy facial hair, smallpox, Wedge as John Jarndyce (I may juss have to change my name to Banning Cocq John Jarndyce the IVIIXXICLM of Westphalia), Janine Evans (nee Butcher), a 2006 inductee of the SAG-HOF (Screen Asshole Guild – Hall of Fame), a dude named Smallweed, a dude named Clamb, and GUPPY!!! Charles Dickens may have hated Jews, but he certainly had a way with names! GUPPY!!
I bet this guy and Phil Spector are BFFs
All he wants is $2
And anyone else out thar ever wonder what woulda happened had Al Gore become president like he rightfully should of New Coke triumphed in the Cola Wars? Yeah, what if? And what if Theo Ratliff ate out Heathcliff (or that purty kitty Riff Raff used to bang)? Maybe NC pitchman Max Headroom woulda gotten head from Hedda Hopper‘s love child with Glenne Headly and Hedy Lamarr!!
1985 > 2006
GO QUINQUAGESIMA!!! Which I hear is like the new hybrid of Quin Snyder, Quaker Oats, and Vai Sikahema!!