Tag Archives: Ezra Miller

High School > Thigh School

The Perks of Being a Wallflower
Not Not Another Teen Movie
Official Website | Trailers & Mo
PG-13 | 102 min

So there’s this known 1999 book by Stephen Chbosky called The Perks of Being a Wallflower.  He didn’t think anyone could do movie justice to it, so he made the dang movie himself.  HOW FCUKING AWESOME (and risky) IS THAT!??!?!?!?!  Others authors have done such a thing before, but none of them have hit the mark quite like SC does with his own book turned movie.  Why?  Cause this movie gets high school and high schoolers and the lows and highs of being a high schooler in high school 101% correctamundo.  If you’ve ever attended a high school, you should see this movie and you will see something of yourself in it, whether you were the jock, the joke, the pretty girl, the ugly girl (all boys are ugly), the dork, the geek, the misfit or any other stereotype we didn’t think of!  It’s true!  This movie is an adolescent treasure in the vein of John Hughes type stuffs!!!  And there’s not many recent teen movies you could say such things of!  Sure, Mean Girls was thighlarious, but it was too unrealistic, and the incredible doc American Teen was juss tooooo real, fo reals, yo, even though the poster ate its BREAKFAST in a CLUB!

Logan Lerman is our title wallflower and he’s so awkward that flowers and walls stay away from him!  He’s going thru a lot of sh!t, but luckily he lands into the laps of new friends Ezra Miller & Emma Watson, who help move him away from the wall, and let his flower bloom, which they do by teaching him about cool music and let him try drugs and girls and fun!  And there’s also Mae Whitman, who’s great, cause she is.  And then there’s the wallflower’s sister Nina Dobrev, who’s so hot that incest would be allowed, but it’s not that kinda of a movie, and that’s OK.  Even Paul Rudd‘s in this movie, in a minor, BUT important role, as a teacher who encourages reading!!  And there are other people in this movie and they are great, CAUSE THIS IS WHAT HIGH SCHOOL IS/WAS LIKE!!!  Cause believe it or snot, we were once a teeny bit of a wallflower teen, but then we found best friends and had the best times and then we all went our own separate ways for college, and stuff, and things, but high school memories WILL NEVER DIE!!!!!!!  like Goonies!

Verdictgo: Breast In Show

Wallflower BLOOMS at a theater near jews

and until next thyme the balcony is clothed…


Problem Child 4

We Need To Talk About Kevin
Birth (Out of) Conrtrol
Official WebsiteTrailers & Mo
R | 112 min

We do need to talk about We Need To Talk About Kevin cause we juss need to talk about it.  First you MUSS MUSS MUSS see this, then we can talk about how Tilda Swinton might be the single greatest half-amphibian-half-human working in movies, and how John C Reilly is the most bestest absent-minded lovable doof working in movies, and how we’d be scared to f$%king death to ever run into Ezra MillerJasper Newell or Rock Duer on the street, cause all 3 of them played Kevin at different ages, and all 3 of em make us never want to have kids, let alone touch a bow and arrow ever again

Lynne Ramsay‘s take on Lionel Shriver‘s 2003 novel of the same name is as beautiful as it is frightening, as empty as it is loving, and as unforgettable as Gus van Sant’s Elephant was kinda forgettable, sorta.  What else do we need to talk about?  Bobbed?  What about bobbed?

VerdictgoBreast In Show

Kevin will get Talked about in NY this Friday and elsewhere elsewhen

and until next thyme the balcony is clothed…

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