Paul Simon
Beacon Theater
May 10th

Paul Simon really aint that crazy after all these years.  He’s juss solidly normal, and mad awesomeszsz.   And he still sounds eggzactly like he always has.  And he still loves his frikkin slow jams.  We do too, but kindsa only the S & Garfunkel stuff (he gave us only 2 of them bones), and not that boring-a$$ ‘Slip Sliding Away’ type shaz or the snail-like tracks he chose to play from his new album, which is hactually a pretty good one… for a 69 year old!!  LETS SEE YER DAD COME UP WITH SOMETHING BETTERER!!!

Simon’s solo catalog is vast, and at its best when he breaks out the latter Graceland & Rhythm of the Saints stuffs.  Oh man, we almost jazzed in our pants when he kicked out ‘Obvious Child’ and ‘Boy In The Bubble’ (which made up for that concert that could have been the greatestest concert of all time if he didn’t let other people sing his songs)

We were kinda expecting a sirprize guest at the show.  Maybe some Art G-ness?  Or how bout Chevy Chase for some ‘Al’ calling (it’s the song that made us fall in love with Paul as a youth)???  There was none of that, and it really wasn’t necessary anywayz, cause we all got a beautiful 2 hour show from one of music’s all-time greeeeeeeeeeeaaattts

Speaking of his iconic status… we don’ts thinks he gets the kinda love that he should from the world.  THIS IS A LIVING LEGEND, FOLKS!!!  WE MUST CELEBRATE THE/HIS LIVING!!!!  ONE DAY PAUL SIMON WON’T BE ON THIS EARTH AND YER GONNA BE SO PISSED YOU DIDN’T CARE THAT MUCH ABOUT HIM WHEN HE WAS LIVINGS!!!!

We literally pray night & gay for his health and for the day that S & G hit the road again and drop some MSG dates on us.  we’d honestly pay $300 to see them.  only thing else we’d pay that much for is amour et spaghetti con Leonor Watling [lightly NSFW]

set list

Crazy Love, Vol. II / Dazzling Blue / 50 Ways to Leave Your Lover / So Beautiful or So What / Slip Slidin’ Away / Vietnam (Jimmy Cliff cover) / Mother and Child Reunion / That Was Your Mother / Hearts and Bones / Mystery Train-Wheels / Rewrite / Peace Like a River / The Obvious Child / The Only Living Boy in New York (Simon & Garfunkel song) / Love Is Eternal Sacred Light / Father and Daughter / Diamonds on the Soles of Her Shoes / Gumboots

Encore – The Sound of Silence (Simon & Garfunkel song) / Kodachrome / Gone At Last / Here Comes the Sun (The Beatles cover) / The Boy in the Bubble

Encore 2 – Still Crazy After All These Years / Late in the Evening

Sleep No More
The McKittrick Hotel
offical site | tickets
now thru June 25th

A woman hands you a playing card and tells you to walk up a set of stairs.  You follow her instruction, and after reaching the top, all light has disappeared and darkness surrounds you, as you continue to make your way somewhere, but have no clue where.  Things quickly become disorienting and possibly even a bit scary.  Fret not, you’ll soon (or eventually) find your way, even blindly, into the safe confines of the McKittrick Hotel’s red-lit bar, where you’ll soon embark on Sleep No More, an unforgettable one-of-a-kind journey and experience you won’t soon forgot, OR WANT TO!!

Once your card is called, yer briefed on the very brief set of rules – you have to wear a white Venetian/Eyes Wide Shut orgy-like mask at all times, you are not allowed to talk at all times, and everything else is pretty much ON limits, most importantly, touching stuff!  If something is off limits (no photography, OBVS!), someone in a black mask will let you know.  Wait, what the heck is this?  Nothing like anything we’ve or you’ve ever done did before!  So, sharpen those senses, shut yer yap and let the fun unfold, at your own pace!

You get to literally roam free, a true Choose Your Own Adventure, in the ‘hotel’ (named after a location in Vertigo)’s six floors and zillions of rooms.  The rooms are all over the cinematic map – one minute you’ll feel like you’re walking thru Norman Bates’ Victorian home (and hearing Bernard Herrmann’s score), the next, The Shining‘s Overlook hotel, and the next, the psycho wards of Jacob’s Ladder, and the next? Some other heeby-jeeby flick that’s made yer skin crawl

While yer exploring, a play is being staged (Shakespeare’s Macbeth… hence the title), but it’s up to you if you want to follow the story and characters (you can literally follow them as they run around the place), or juss dig through their actual drawers (or candy jars!).  We opted for the latter, but you can do whatever the funk you want.  That’s the beauty of this – it’s what you make of it.  So if you want to have a lame time, you will have one!  Probably not though, since the place/play is quite low on lame-ness

If yer in New York over the next two months, you have to do this.  It’s a piece of theater that’s worth the price of admission, cause it’s nothing like theater.  And please, go in with an open mind, wide set of eyes, a well rested body, and most importantly, someone you don’t want to talk to for 2-3 hours

I used to hate on Damon Albarn and Blur, but then I fell in love with a girl in the summer 1996 and then I no longer hated Damon Albarn and Blur cause she loved Damon Albarn and Blur and her body was mad kickin and sick, and whatever made her body move and groove would now would make mine move and groove.  the rest is mystory

Damon Albarn is my moist flavorite musician goings, and maybe ever.  probably ever!!!  he’s like the Stanley Kubrick of music making, if Stanley looked like Jude Law.  he is like Jesus and Moses and Col Mustard rolled into one human being.  HUMAN BEING AWESOME!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

schlappy 43rd matey!!!!!!!!!!!

Albarn – empee3 love 1991 – 2005

from the whhhhhhhhhhaaaat files:

Addams Family + Tag Team = ‘Addams Family (Whoomp!)’ ??????????????????????????????

yeah, we all knew that MC Hammer got his groove on with the Fam, but nobody whoomped to the above trick!!!!! you can WHOOMP the people once, but you can’t do it twice.  WHOOMP, THERE IT WASN’T!!!

+

from Carter Burwell, the Coen’s go to composer, comes whatever this was from Psycho III

Burwell provides his own notes on scoring the film and working with director/star Anthony Perkins

side note: Psycho III‘s Jeff Fahey refused to go full on nude for one scene, so he covered his bits with lamps.  yes, LAMPS!!!  [WATCH, but kinda sorta NSFWish]

and while we’re talkin mussssic, FOR ONCE…

this AXE ad is nice and saucy and spray-y and whatevs

but

DID YOU HEAR THAT ANGELIC CHORAL/ORCHESTRAL VERSION OFAIR’S ‘SEXY BOY’??????? – EXCLUSIVE!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!: download empee3 of the Fallen Angels’ cover of ‘Sexy Boy‘!!!

EXCLUSIVE: WE LOVE YOU!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

and so does Fahey and his hot lamps!

Bono for Lucky Clovers

Ire Straits

Lick Me, I’m Thighrish

Highway Leprechaun Revisited

I’m Peeing Green

Green With Fapvy

&

Erin Go Braghkovich