Colorado, you too good to me & we (wife and me)!!

We came for the food, and wine

and to watch people be alcoholics 

and see new chefs and people with bobs

and pause for the claws

and eat out of tin pans like orphans

and try to avoid having a heart-attack 

and get fatter by juss looking at food

and question other food, as in, ‘is this food?‘

     

and eat the local candies

and check out one of America’s more faaancy looking Maccy D’s

and visit THE original Chipotle!!

but it wasn’t juss about eating!

it was also about recycling!!

and the stars!  and bothering them!!!

John Salley is so tall & friendly & tall!!

and the Jacques Pépin was m-mightier then the sw-sword!!

and da Iron Chef, getting frisky with my Iron Curtained honey

and Ryan Zimmerman and Jordan Zimmermann’s brother Andrew Zimmern

and Canadian Jew Gail Simmons!

and yer looking at the new hosts of NBC’s The Today Show – Sara Palan, Justin Chapple, Tamron Hall and Me

and Pink!  who had pink hair!

and this guy who isn’t famous, but famous to we cause he gave us 23891239123939 pairs of shades

 

and my new BFF – Drew Barrymore

but but but but

Colorado aint really about all the above

it’s about the mountains

THOSE FCUKING AMAZING MOUNTAINS!!! (and rocks!)

  

 

 

 

and a zillion other amazinnnnnnnnnnng views

like the one at Coors Field (AWESOME STADIUM!!)

and the Jurassic Best Western

AND RED ROCKS!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! 

where I’ve always wanted to go ever since I grew up red-rocking out to this

and I did!

place is UNBELIEVABLE!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

so jealous people get to see concerts here (and exercise)

and then there was the Mile Hi Church

 

look familiar?

 

yep

my only regret?  (besides not living in Colorado?)

not being at Coors Field for yarmulke night

NEXT TIME!!!!

X-rays of the hands of King George V and Queen Mary, 1896

[via]

Niagara Falls, frozen 

never remember / always forget

Me and Earl and The Dying Girl
Me Hurl and The Dying For This Movie To End
Official Website | Trailers & Mo
PG-13 | 104 min

I don’t even know exactly how to sum up how much I didn’t like (and basically HATTTTTTTTTTTTTED) this movie, and I really don’t have to bother since David Edelstein somehow captured my thoughts exactly, but…

if you are looking for a crappier version of…

The Fault in Our Stars

but less romantic

that focuses on one of THE most annoying and non-interesting teenage protagonists I’ve encountered in a while (this is not actually him)

who is forced by his mom to hang out with that super adorable girl from Bates Motel, who has nothing to do in the movie cept have big eyes, and eventually shave her head cause she has cancer

and our annoying teen boy gets by in his dweeby high school life with his quirky black friend (think Urkel, but not really.  I juss wanted to post a gif of Urkel)

and together they re-make movies in a way that’s somehow dumber then the ultra-dumb Be Kind Rewind

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=J7C8nHAAs70

and the whole movie feels like the 193482382th Wes Anderson Rushmore rip-off you’ve ever seen

and the movie feels like one giant cancer guilt trip, that isn’t worth taking

and for some reason Nick Offerman is in it, and he’s basically as exciting as the grumpy looking cats he looks like

and if I don’t have anything nice to say, too bad, cause I already said it, but don’t see this movie cause it sucks, besides MAYBE the last last 5 minutes, but getting to that last five minutes is pointless torture, but I will say something nice – the Pittsburgh-regional locations for the movie were AWESOME!  Especially the high school they used!

Verdictgo: f this movie, so Slit Your Eyes Out Repoopulous

Him, Earl and Toe Jam zzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzes you in limited release

and until next thyme the balcony is clothed…