in 1987’s Adventures In Babysitting, the crew couldn’t leave a bar they stumbled into without singing the blues

in 2016’s water-downed but not totally unwatchable remake of Adventures In Babysitting, the crew couldn’t leave a club they stumbled into without a RAP BATTLE!!!????

what will happen in the 2045 remake????  ROBOT BABYSITTERS WITH iPAD HANDS THROWING mp5s AT EACH OTHER??????????

House at The End of The Street
Dead End On Arrival
Official Website | Trailers & Mo
PG-13 | 101 min

There’s a house in this movie, but its actual location on its street is never EVER determined. It could be at the beginning of the street or even in the MIDDLE of the street, but it is never ever noted that the house is actually located at the end of the street.  So why bother naming your movie House at The End of The Street?  Guess Generic Sorta Horror Movie X was juss not catchy enuff.  Having a poorly used title is one thing, but being a poor movie in general is another

OK, so the house did have some murders in it, which we see in the very first scene, but they are about as creepy as the bleeps and the sweeps were in Spaceballs… which means they are not creepy at all.  The presentation of these murders was purty darns silly, and it sets the tone for everything else from there on out – laffable

You will laff at the kid (Max Thieriot) who still lives in the house that his parents were murdered in, and who keeps his sister (the murderer?????????????????????????????) locked in the basement, and who doesn’t do such a good job at keeping her locked in the basement, cause she’s always getting out and running in the woods and screaming and stuff.  And you will laff at his budding romance with his new neighbor Jennifer Lawrence, who sings laffable love ballads for zero reason other than to maybe launch a blah singing career to add to her blah acting career.  We wouldn’t dare laff at J-Law’s hot MILF Elisabeth Shue, cause we’re actually crying at her, cause she deserves better than this, like more adventures in babysitting or having MORE liquor being poured on her boobs [NSFW]

Anywho, stuff happens, but so does sh!t, and the twists that come our way are about as shocking as Jeremy Shockey doing something douchey, and when your movie is about as shocking as Jeremy Shockey doing something douchey, it means your movie is pretty f$%king stoopid

Street Treat: we want to eat off Allie MacDonald‘s dollar menu!!

Verdictgo: Slit Your Eyes Out Repoopulous

Street has no outlet today at a theater near jews

and until next thyme the balcony is clothed…