Movies For the Masses

Mayor of The Sunset Strip

There once was a movie called Who’s Harry Crumb? By the end of that movie, I realized that he wasn’t a guy worth knowing. But what if you were asked who’s Rodney Bingenheimer? You probably wouldn’t know him from Adam Corolla, but bee leave a me you, after watching this documentary about his life, he is a guy worth knowing. So, who eggzactly is Rodney Bingernehiemamemrewmerier? Welly, welly, welly, welly, welly, well, he’s one of the most influential groupies and radio DJs of the past 40 years. He’s a walking A to Zed of rock music (circa 1960 to the present). He helped to push Glam Rock (Bowie/T-Rex), Punk Rock (Clash/Sex Pistols) Alt Rock (Nirvana/Sonic Youth), and Brit Rock (Oasis/Blur) into the limelight. He was Davy Jones’ stand-in on TV’s The Monkees, Sonny & Cher’s unofficial child, and dear friend to both Kato Kaelin AND Corey Feldman! Sounds like the life, right? Although Rodney is everyone’s pal in a world of who’s who and bling-bling, he’s just a lost soul swimming in a fish bowl… year after year. Anywho, this doc is a bit depressing, but an inspiring kaleidoscopic trip down music’s memory lane. A fantabulous piece of work. I’ll give it 4 (out of 5) pieces of matzah.

The Texas Chainsaw Massacre

Besides money, why remake a movie if you’re not going to improve upon it? Uh, money? Gus Van Sant’s tried to make an “artistic” shot-by-shot remake of Psycho, but he failed worse than me at Spanish. Gus, you ARE not the dog, now man! Enuff about Gus, and more about the new Leatherface. How could a horror movie not be horrific? I mean Dave & Chainsaw’s classroom hijinks were far scarier in Carl Reiner’s Summer School. They should have just thrown away the “script” and had Jessica Biel run in fields with her boobs bouncing this way and that. This movie blows and only deserves 1 and 1/2 golden calves. Moses would need those 15 commandments to throw at these 1 and 1/2 calves.

The Misfits

On the last day of filming this movie, Clark Gable famously said “Christ, I’m glad this picture’s finished. She[Marilyn Monroe] damn near gave me a heart attack.” The next day, Gable suffered a massive heart attack and would die 11 days later. This would also turn out to be Ms. Monroe’s final completed film. Did I also mention that Eli “Tuco” Wallach and Montgomery Clift co-starred and it was directed by virtuoso John Huston? Sounds like Mt. Olympus of moviemaking, eh? It aint the greatest story ever told, but mos def worth a look based on all the above plus the breathtaking cinematography of the dying wild west (+++ a great close-up of Marilyn’s tight tush while riding a horse). It was a lil hard to take Gable’s character seriously since his name was Gay Langland and everyone kept calling him “Gay.” Just cause he has a peculiar mustache, doesn’t mean he’s a Village Person. That a side, 3 and 1/4 mustachios.

Did I use the word “this” too much?