Tag Archives: Kirby Bliss Blanton

DIY Not?

Project X
X Marks The Spot, OF FUN!!!
Official WebsiteTrailers & Mo
R | 88 min

Ever seen Can’t Hardly Wait?  Hopefully not, but if you did, Nima Nourizadeh‘s Project X is like Can’t Hardly Wait, cept it’s awesome and has hactual bare boobs, and gnomes, and fire, and water, and water on boobs, but not fire on boobs, and dorks we sorta care about (Thomas MannOliver Cooper and Jonathan Daniel Brown, who is our new hero.  Not only did he go on a fake date with Whitney Port, but he also played a fake nerd in a porn [watch NSFNess]!!!).  And it’s got stuff, and fun, and a dog, and a midget, and a moon bounce, and it will remind you why high school was so awesome and how America’s got teen spirit like no other country, and did we mention watery boobs yet?

Kirby Your Enthusiasm GaloreKirby Bliss Blanton & Nichole Bloom is be OK and all, but we’d prefer to invite these girls to our pants party…

Anna Sophia Berglund

Alexis Knapp aka Alexis Merizalde

this woulda been an endless list of hotties, cept 98% of them party goers aren’t listed on IMDb

Verdictgo: Jeepers Mos Def Worth A Peepers

 

also, we forgot to review…

Chronicle
With Great Power Comes Great Responsibility Fun!!!
Official WebsiteTrailers & Mo
PG-13 | 84 min

This movie is similar to Project X – three unknownish actors (although you totes know who Dane DeHaan is if you were a fan of In Treatment) battle endless hand-held camera action, and a budget the size of your penis.  Also, like X, it’s awesome, and does more with less than you do with your tiny penis.  But these three cats aint just party animals, theys gots super super powers and it’s more super powerful than anything goings on in one of those other big budget superhero movies we’ve seen in like the past like 5 years like.  like 9reals yo!!!

Verdictgo: Jeepers Mos Def Worth A Peepers

X + Chron are currently awesome at a theater near jews

and until next thyme the balcony is clothed…

oh, and a special shout out to Brady Hender and Nick Nervies, who deserve there own Project X spin-off, Project XI

make it happen Hollywürst!!!

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