Thighs Wide Shut

– Lowest IQed Couple Call It Quits!!! Yep, pregnant Denise Richards filed for divorce from Charles Sheen!!! No word as to why, but I think she wants to run away with her new boyfriend, become a pilot, and fight the giant insects of Klendathu.

– Steve Hartman should be arrested for not being funny.

– Her Former Royal Thighness speaks out about being a party girl: ‘I’m not going to deny the fact that I’ve tried pot. I hated it. But I’ve never tried cocaine.’ I believe you LL.

– Paris painting a nekkid Nicky. [sorta NSFWness via ONTD]

– Is Steve Martin the new Tony Randall?

– Will Smith be hatin’ on breasts.

– Moby, the teacher. Now he can put people to sleep with his music AND his words.

– Don’t even try to put one of these words or phrases on a personalized jersey from the NFL shop you Ass Clown! Thankfully ‘Your Name’ is eggceptable… which is what the Thigh Master has on the back of his Redskins jersey. [via Johnny Dollar Bill$$$]

– Fingerbootyology [via MetaFiltz]

– What people’s desktops look like

– The Free Front Blog

– More Yahoo! 10 Year B-Day Fun!

– Best blog I’ve seen in awhile: Blink O Rama [via Zach de la Roachclip]

– Looking for the perfect St Patty’s Day gift? Bid on one of Tawny Peaks’ breast implants.

– And juss in case u were wondering, this is what HRT II’s autograph looks like. But something tells me you’all be too busy looking at the lightbulbs in the background.

[via UseMyComputer]

– Before my Thighs were Wide Shut, and even before my Non-US ladies were all Hottied up, I used to write quite a lot for my boys over at InsideJoke.TV. But now that I’m such a huge superstar blogjay, I have less and less time for my old compadres. However, I will never forgot all that they have done for me, like paying me in hamburgers, so I always throw back some love when I can. And my latest contribution is the most brilliant thing you’ve ever read that has the word ‘gopher’ in it. I present to you, my qwikie guide to winning your Oscar Pool: Million Dollar Maybes. Maybe it will even help yer chances of beating me in my pool, which u still need to sign up for (group id ‘Thighs R Us’, password ‘cuthbert’). U can even PayPal me the $10 entry fee! How easy is that? And if I win, I promise I’ll become like all the other cool people and get meself an iPod.

– Here’s a pic of HRT the II with my giant boner stabone towering in the background. Big ups to my best friend Balthazar Getty who snapped this… although I’m so sick of him putting his name all up on his pics.

– Daddy Lohan claims his shenanigans have helped LL’s career. Too bad it’s another Michael that brought her this far… ME!!

– The teaser of Phil K Dick Linklater’s A Scanner Darkly his online. Basically, if you liked Waking Life, yer gonna love this. [via The Bitch]

– Birdneck Paltrow and Chris Boring’s love on the rocks? Zzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzz (s)topp!!

– Things I never thought of doing til Peabs suggested it #5: watch ‘The Bicycle Thief on ‘ludes and kit kat while getting your ass Edvard Munched upon by Mark Fidrych…‘

– So I opens my annual Oscar Pool to the public and only 11 of yous signed up? That’s mandy moore PATHETIC than Stallone in Oscar!!! Shiz is this Sunday and you better enter or else. CLICK HERE, make yo picks, join the ‘Thighs R Us’ group with password ‘cuthbert’, and send me $10!!! Winner spanks all. Truss me, it’s fun and you aint gonna beat me.

– Real-life OC porkers, Adam Brodes & Rachel Bill$ have been pleading with the show’s writers to keep their characters apart. Then what’s the point of even having the Summer character? And btw, who lives in her house? Seems like anyone can juss walk into her room unannounced. And if u didn’t see it, The Sports Guy compares the first two seasons of The OC to 90210.

– Even Obi-Wan loathed Episode II.

– Halle Berry to attend the Razzies?

– Tony Kornheiser comes up with the single greatest reason why Laveranues Coles should leave DC: so his computer’s spellcheck won’t stop every time at his first name. And don’t forget, T-K Stack Money and Wilbon will be appearing on Letterman this Thurs and then the deadly combo of Ricky Gervais and Rachael Ray on Fries. Thanks to Spence for the following…

– Who’s the latest and greeeediest Lohan of them all? Gran-ma-ma Lohan.

– Peace the FORK out to punter extraordinaire Reginald Roby & mummy-loving terrorist Navi Araz. This gif’s for both of yous…

1) The Sea Inside
2) Hotel Rwanda
3) Million $$$ Baby
4) Closer
5) The Woodsman
6) Eternal Sunshine of the Spotless Mind
7) Vera Drake
8) Napoleon Dynamite
9) Dig!
10) The Incredibles
11) Mayor of Sunsetstrip

Honorable Mentions: Harry Pots 3, Spidey 2, Ray, Kinsey, Mean Girls, Finding Neverland, Collateral, Valentin