thank you for being born

WHY?  I know, right?  golf blows more goats than George Clooney & Joss Whedon combined!!!

this why…

these drinks is soooo gooooood that it’s the real reason that Moses invented earth in the first place!!!!!!!!!

so how did Arnold Palmer invent himself in a drink form?????

HISTORY LESSONSZ –

One evening after a long day of designing a course in Palm Springs during the 1960s, Arnold Palmer stepped up to a bar and asked the bartender for a mixture of lemonade and iced tea. A woman sitting next to him overheard what he ordered and told the bartender, ‘I’ll have that Palmer drink’. From that moment on, this refreshing lemonade-iced tea beverage became known as an ‘Arnold Palmer’, and its name gradually spread throughout the golfing world and beyond into mainstream America [more via Tea for Tee]

+ ESPN Films 30 for 30 Shorts: The Arnold Palmer [watch!!!]

Arnold Palmer also invented air, Popeyes Fried Chicken, The Traveling Wilburys, and the moon landing.  Thank you Arnold, you truly are a man amongst apes

your unbeloved master of thighs needs a lil break.  so it’s off to the beach to eat 328347218238238 Nic-O-Bolis and sunburn my balls, and abuse your mother’s vagina

if you miss me that much, buy a shirt and maybe we’ll stop abusing your mother’s vagina

Rodriguez
Sixth & I Historic Synagogue
August 30th

New music is boo music, and that’s why we’ve let our summer be ruled by rocking 70 year olds.  First by the Boys of the Beach, then by the so good so good so good Jewish Elvis, and now by a man who no one outside of South Africa (and Australia, and odd parts of Detroit) had ever even heard of a month ago.  His name is Rodriguez, and if you’ve had your heart nuclearly warmed by his lost and found story to end all lost and found stories – documented in the MUSS MUSS SEE Searching For Sugar Man, then you know what wees talking bout.  If you don’t, you better recognize and get yer thighs tantalized OR ELSE!!!!

Ever since we walked out of that movie theater, we’ve over-over-dosed on his two lost gem albums, and the doc’s soundtrack [BUY IT NOW!!!  IT ONLY $6.99!!!!!!!!!], so much so that we actually bleed Rodriguez.  Don’t believe us?  Cut our arm and see what comes out – inner city blues!!!!  It’s true.  And in that one short month, Rodriguez has permanently etched a place in our heart, right next to the likes of them other CLASSIC old thighmers like The Beach Boys and Neil Diamond.  That’s saying something, and we juss said it

So what does a notoriously shy, unmade legend sound like in concert, probably well out of his prime?  There’s barely any internets info on the matter, and he doesn’t even have any listings over at the indispensable SetList.fm.  But who cares, cause Rodriguez didn’t thrive on being known, and now he’s thriving for being a mystery

The complete mystery will never be solved.  Rodriguez will always remain a mystery.  He slowly moves, quietly banters to himself, but kills any bit of stage awkwardness with a friendly smile, and owns an audience as soon as he starts singing his brutally honest and endearing songs, and strumming the fcuk out of his guitar.  His set was short, but it didn’t feel like it, and it was beyond sweet.  It was actually beyond amazing.  No backing band (unlike his triumphant, symphonic Letterman appearance), just Rodriguez, handing in an intimate experience that no one in the audience will soon forget

Here is a partial set list (we snagged)

which doesn’t include some additional songs he played + covers of Lou Rawls’ ‘Dead End Street’ & Elvis’ ‘Blue Suede Shoes’, but apparently he had other covers in mind!!  There’s a separate set list page scribbled with songs like ‘Let The Good Times Roll’, ‘Whole Lotta Shaking’, ‘Unchain My Heart’ and even ‘Lets Get It On’.  Wowsers.  Woulda LOVED to have heard him play all of those, plus more of his second album (which he seemed to neglect all together), so guess this means we’ll juss have to see him again, and again, and again, cause this mystery has many more layers yet to be unraveled, and who doesn’t love a good mystery, hispecially one with a soundtrack that’s even better than the mystery!?!?!?

We hope we’re this awesome at age 70, and we hope you are too

in dis-honor of our brethren over at Non US Hotties….

ANYONE NOT A FAN OF BING-BANGING-ING-BING-ING-ING FAN BINGBING?????

WE’D LET HER PLAY PINGPONG WITH OUR SHLINGSHLONG ALL NIGHT BINGLONG!!!!

WE LONG LONG LOVE YOU BINGLONG TIME!!!

(it’s not racist when it’s done out of love/lust)