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Tar Heels All Wounds

while you were livin it up wherever you was bein this past tweakend, I was gettin my Ole McDonald on in St Nowhere, for the second time in 1/2 a year (please lord, don’t let it happen again!!). Sure, it wasn’t no club taradise, but anything was heaven on hearth after the muggy bogues that was Miami Bitch

this may not look like much to you

but if it means that you dont have to
take a dump outside
den this shiz is more majestic than the Taj Mahal!

twas three thymes a charm
as we finally succumbed
and came all over ourselves

after scarfin down
‘jangles sweet sweetback’s baadasssss’
BoBerry & Cinnamon Sweet Biscuits

who’s ever heard of a Tatung anything?

Hell, I wouldn’t even let Hitler use this piece of Ta-crap

RDU blows goats cause they wouldn’t let me smuggle
2 cans of Cheerwine north of the Anthony Mason-Juan Dixon line

but they made up for it by having an all-ACC sto

and gots a few mo bonus points

for the bestest use of two A’s since
Amsterdam’s Centraal Station

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Noah’s bArk

Noah built an Ark to save his family and the world’s dopest animals from the oncoming Great Flood. So I got to wondering who Joakim Noah would build an ark for


considering his family tree consists of super freaky looking humans, animals, and fictional entertainers (sea below). None of these relations can be proven in court or on the basketball court, but this shiz aint no phyla, this shiz is gen(i)us! Roll the ugliness!!

raker of moons
Jaws

Carter coached
Rick Gonzalez
•

no Yankee hunter, but any kind o’
catfish

the out of sync stylings of
Milli Vanilli
(including the bones of Rob Pilatus)

conclusion jumper
Richard Riehle

man of a thousand OOGly faces
Michael Jackson

Bros Mario geist
Boo

finkers
Mischa & Falkor Barton

stinkers
Eagle Eye & Neneh Cherry

hairy half-caf mulatto duo
Kravitz-Bonet

plague-infested enemy of
Gibson Rickenbacker from Cyborg

rocky roader
Sloth

the always eating tunafish lips of
Kyra Sedgwick

poorman’s Chewbacca
Ookla The Mok

not so young cannibal
Roland Gift

terror dogs
Vinz Clortho & Zuul

the manly men of
Encino

world’s mos ugly and deceased dog

&
how could one leave out

the patriarch of all this poopedness
Yannick


addish-anal repooping by MMM & Mans de Glue

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