Thighs Wide Shut

they musta blown the entire budget on dem ho-riffic sweaters

Not The Cosbys XXX [NSFWness via Sigh Master]

+ for the 9th zillionth time: Let It Cosby

The Cove
A Higher Porpoise In Life
Trailers & Mo | Official Website

There’s something awfully rotten goings on in Japan, and not many people know about it, well, that is until now, with the release of the call to arms, engrossing and sometimes gross doc The Cove. In the tiny coastal town of Taiji, dolphins in their natural habitat are captured, the best being sold off to seaquariums around the globe, and the rest, in a secluded cove (we smell a title here!), are slaughtered and turned into meat (passed off as whale meat) and distributed to national grocery stores and local schools. Not only are these killings harsh and pointless to our smarty jones friends of the sea, but the meat they’re doling out contains high levels of Mercury, and the last time we checked, Mercury is hactually less healthy for you than triple fried fried chicken in gravy. And guess what, the people of Taiji make a lot of effin money off these dolphins and will do anything within their abusive powers to prevent anyone from meddling with their affairs, dastardly practices and giant pocket books, at home and abroad

Enter Ric O’Barry, the OG trainer of the dolphins that appeared in the beloved 60s TV show Flipper. Flipper‘s success single-handedly launched the world’s obsession with dolphins, and gave rise to places like Sea World, where we watch them do stoopid silly tricks with beach balls and splashing water. At first, O’Barry took advantage of the craze, but as time wore on, he realized that his aquatic friends really really really loathed being caged up for our amusement (there’s an unforgettable and heartbreaking story he tells about one of the Flipper dolphins) and decided to take action on their behalf. His crusade has recently taken him to Taiji and it’s hidden cove, but this battle is almos as hard as fighting Nick Rivers in an underwater bar

Enter the dragon photographer turned director Louie Psihoyos, who along with O’Barry assembles a crack team of sound and videographers, divers and even ILM special effects gurus to investigate further and try to expose these atrocities to the world. Mission set, and thru a giant game of cat and mouse played with the townpeeps, done up in a thrilling Man On Wire style (but there aint no reenactments here kids!), mission accomplished! That doesn’t mean that they’ve solved the problem, but they did get the message out, and the resulting documentary will make you enraged and want to join the cause. The Cove is truly a muss see for anyone who has eyes (people w/o eyes need not apply), which means if you see one doc this year, make it this one (who knows what else comes out this fall, but it’s gonna be hard to top this), and if you see two docs this year, make it the one below that’s not in Kansas anymo

Carpathianbaggers: ‘phin activist Hayden Panettiere and her trip to Taiji makes a brief appearance in the film, but the more impressive cameo comes about when the boys go to the ILM studios to pick up some toys for their trip, and standing in the background starring them down is none other than (the painting of) Vigo from Ghostbusters II!!!

Verdictgo: Breast In Shiow

Not Quite Hollywood: The Wild, Untold Story of Ozploitation!
All Up In The Down Underground
Trailers & Mo | Official Website

While Peter Weir‘s costumed dramas may have put Australia on the movie map (before Crocodile Dundee erased it), they didn’t pave the way quite like the Z-movie jiggle fests, decapitation sprees and redonk stunt spectaculars that came before em in the early 70s and 80s. George Miller‘s Mad Max may be the only one any of us have ever heard of, but after watching Mark Hartley‘s overloaded (in a good way) doc on the subject, you’ll quickly want to rectify that (of course, only after saving the dolphins!). All the interviewees are colorful and overly candid, with such Outback luminaries chiming in as Barry Humphries, George Lazenby, Rod Taylor, Susannah York, Owen Lars’ dad Cliegg and numerous others folk (including stuntman extraordinaire Grant Page) that none of us have ever had the pleasure of knowing + some Yanks who were dragged across the world to bring some ‘class’ to their industry, like Jamie Lee Curtis, Dennis Hopper, Stacy Keach, as well as superfan Quentin Tarantino, who’s enthusiasm here is a plus, when it’s usually the opposite. In a bust-a-nutshell, NQH: TW,USoO is an absolute BLAST (and the wursted title we’ve ever tried to abbreviate). There probably won’t be another film out this summer that contains as much non-stop action, suspense, horror and romance (read boobies, and LOTS of em) as NQH: TW,USoO did, and that’s a 986% guarantee or your money crack! If you have an attention span shorter than your dad’s penis then come one, come all over the place and see this love letter to the early free-wheeling days of Australian cinema!

Women Glow & Men Plunder: had TWS.org been alive and well-hung, living in Australia during their new wave of cinema, there woulda been so much NSFW love on this site that yer palms woulda been hairier than Borat’s nephew Boltok, esp with lovely ladies like Deborah Gray, Cheryl Rixon, Lynda Stoner and Abigail gettin their yam-yams out again & again!!

Verdictgo: Breast In Show

docs Da Cove and Not Quite Hollywood dish out medicine today in NY/LA only, and elsewhere elsewhen

and until next thyme the balcony is clothed…

after watching this heartfelt and melancholy interview with Jake Lloyd, 10 years removed from playing Anakin Skywalker in Episode 1, we wanna take back every single negative thing we’ve ever said about him and that 2854 hour pod race. sure, no one pointed a gun to his head and said, boy, you have to be in this movie and act worser than Bruce Jenner in Can’t Stop The Music, but someone musta did put a gun to George Lucas’ head and said, manboy, write the crudiest script you could possibly dream up, with dialog that smells worser than some logs found in a public toilet, that will single-handedly ruin all things great about Star Wars. then the gunman demanded that Lucas kill off its two most awesome new characters in the first movie and thus leave the next two adventures devoid of anything worth watching, besides bugs farting (see #7) and the mos JOable Star Wars scene mt EVERest, when Natalie Portman, in that tight white outfit, gets slashed on the waist and screams in ecstasy agony. if you can’t find it in your heart to forgive Jake Lloyd, then juss watch his fake father Christopher dance like no one is watching [addish reporting by OviWani]

word booty to Rooney wording booty to Cronkite

wish we could hear what Cronkite woulda had to say about Andrew, but that aint happening, and alsos we don’t want to think of a world w/o Rooney, word booty word Rooney! or a world w/o Charles Osgood and his epic poems and rhymes that put all rappers to shame, Chris Osgood and Ron Osgood

and to hell with swine flu pandemics

cause we have a NSFW fapdemic on our hands!!

and eat it 4 8 15 16 23 42!!!

cause 28 17 81 33!!!
#skinsjerseytoendallskinsjerseys

Jacob & sons?

Jarvis & son!!!!!!!!!!

`cos everybody hates a tourist

+ that’s what he said

remember Araceli González?
thoughts snot
so hear wee gogh agrain
about how bonita y caliente mi esposa es

what, u wanted something a lil moe bone inducing/bone melting?

peep her lookin like Diego Luna w/a really nice set of NSFWness