Invitation To Love

The Uninvited
Répondez S’il Vous Plaîted Out, With A Side of Hotttt Sisters
Trailers & Mo | Official Website

lettuce be honest hear. there were only two reasons we saw this movie and one of them wasn’t that The Uninvited was a well shot, beautifully located, yet ultimately subdued and subpar remake of the Korean nightmareclusterfudge A Tale of Two Sisters (Janghwa, Hongryeon)

reason #1!

Emily Browning, that adorable girl with those luscious jackson lips that sink ships from Lemony Snicket, who we can finally talk dirty about cause the girl will be/is a woman soon/now finally/finally (aka, she’s legal seafood now!)

reason #2!

Arielle Kebbel, who has one of the moistest fun names to say, especially in her ear, when we’re giving her the old in-out, in-out. she’s always in crappy movies and we feel bad for her. we also feel her up

these sweet cheeked cheekie cheeks play sweet cheeked cheekie cheek sisters in The Sixth Sense The Hand That Rocks The Cradle What Lies Beneath The Uninvited. their dad is Edward R Murrow and he’s totally banging Elizabath ‘Apparently I Never Turn Down Any Script’ Banks. they don’t like her (we’re starting to feel the same way) and they think she killed their mumsy. the whole time we’re led to believe that Banks did kill their mums, but can it be as simple as that? or is there a twist heading our way that’s about as twisty as The Fat Boys’ cover of the Chubby Checker cover of the Hank Ballard and the Midnighters original song? or both? or neither?

who cares cause it’s all about the Browning-Kebbel eye and thigh candy up on the big screen. unfortch these aren’t the kinda sisters that take showers together to save time and the earth’s resources, so our consolation prize is one lil scene where they hold hands in bed. it’s nuttin to fax home about, but we haven’t been this eggcited by a bed sharing scene between two hotties we sweat more than the fat people sweat in Sweatin’ To The Oldies since The Quiet, aka the movie where TWO Her Royal Thighnesses (Cuthbest and Camilla Ring Our Belle) share a bed cause nature intended it! Speaking of Her Royal Thighnessesesses, our current one (that’s Leonor Watling, for those praying at home) juss gave birth to a bebé that isn’t ours so it’s off with her head!! while we search thigh and low for her replacement, the raw offices of Browning-Kebbel will fill in as temporary HRTs. which lady in weighting do you bee leave is moist deserving of sitting on the throne of Thighland and sitting on our face?

The Ending of a Don Era: although he’s in the movie for 8.6 seconds, The Uninvited marks the very last motion picture performance of our main man amongst Charles Mann, Don S. Davis. you may know him breast as Scully’s Dad or the other voice of Wild Bill or that dude from that show, but in our hearts and in our farts, he will always remain Major Garland Briggs

breast in peace Major!

Verdictgo: Sum Merit But No Stinkin Badges, although the chicks are BREAST IN SHOW!!

The Uninvited is currently playing at a theater new Jews

and until next thyme the balcony is clothed…