Phish Is DeadHooooray!!!
25. May, 2004 
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Phish, an Ultra smelly jam band and the inspiration for an awful Ben & Jerry’s flavor, will finally be hanging up the vacuum cleaner for good at the end of their summer tour. This is the greatest news in music since Justin Guarini applied for unemployment. But what are the millions of people who wasted thousands upon thousands o dollars on glass pipes, stoopid ironic t-shirts, and bootlegs going to do with their money for years to come? Maybe they can pool their money and raise Jerry Garcia from the dead (no pun intended). Peace out Phish. You were a bunch of gifted musicians who wasted everyone’s time and money. For more information on that stoopid vacuum, click here.
