Do You WantFriesday With That?
These People Were Born
1564 – Paltrow banging, William “Steak &” Shakespeare
1791 – 15th dead prez, James “Pat” Buchanan
1928 – acting tater-tot, Shirley Temple “the most amazing mixed drink for kids”
1936 – one of ma’s favorite crooners, Roy”ce Clayton” Orbison
1939 – the guy in The Fall Guy, Lee “Minors or” Majors
1943 – de plane, de glazed, Herve “Nick Nack” Villechaize
1949 – Three’s accompanier, Joyce DeWitt “Deloitte Touche”
1954 – the white equivalent of Al Sharpton, Michael “Roger, Roger” Moore
1960 – 80’s van-hair, Valerie “Mrs. Eddie Van Halen” Bertinelli
1968 – All-American jackass, Timothy “I’m a cocksucker” McVeigh
Life is tuff when
even a bottle of Moet
is taller than you
And This Shit Happened
1867 – William Lincoln patents the Zoetrope, a machine which shows animated pictures by mounting a strip of drawings in a wheel. Franc F Coppola later steals the name for his own production company and unleashes Jeepers Creepers I & II onto the world.
1933 – The Gestapo (internal security police) is established in Germany. Their first mission, rescuing cats from trees.
1954 – Hank Aaron hits his first major league home run. Let the death threats begin.
1994 – Physicists discover the top quark subatomic particle. What?
“Did I really direct Captain Eo?”