Qwik Bitz
19. Mar, 2004 
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– Tammy Faye announces that she has inoperable cancer. Will Vanilla Ice and the rest of her Surreal Life housemates be there for support?
– Child pornography charges against Pee-Wee Herman were dropped. Now he can stop wasting money on lawyers and finally spend it at Mario’s Magic Shop or Chuck’s Bike-O-Rama.
– The worst restaurant ever, Red Lobster, is going to cut-back on their all-you-can-eat promotions cause the patrons are literally eating their profits. I will never eat Shit Lobster or Long John Silver’s. There’s just something about fish and fast food that doesn’t sit well with me. Sort of like Re-puke-le-cans and the White House.
