Thighs Wide Shut

Andy Rooney deconstructs the Girl Scout Cookie

Raconteurs, Glasgow’s ABC 3/21/06, d-lodlicous

Gorillaz to quit by Christmas? Cause who’d dare ruin (C)Hanukkah? Maybe the only splittin’ they doin is like the Bananas

B sure to mark November 3rd down on yer Anne Geddes calendars, cause The Santa Clause 3, Flushed Away, and Borat battle for box office bourne supremacy. Here’s hoping everyone’s flavorite Kazakhstani flushes away the (in)competition

Peace the fork out Buck-O, Lacostly guy, and Richard Fleischer, director of Conan, stuff, and Soylent Green… mmm, soylent green

Nadine Coyle going solo? Who?

Trent Reznor is more gay than Rudy

What planet does Samuel L hail from? I thought it was Haruun Kal, but it lookin mo like the animal planet. First we gets Snakes On a Plane, and next, Farce of the Penguins

Spreaking de deutsche of, guess we can cross Mace Windex off for next Friday [Passout]

Adam Morrison’s Five Stages of Grief

Must Love Jaws

‘Karma In The Life’ Beatles vs Radiohead [d vis PBliss]

The 2006 Tribeca Film Fest’s line-up has been unleashed. Passess are already on sale, with single tix for Amex peeps begin on the 8th. More ticketing details here.

After a qwik look schedule, here be things I’d like to viddy well:
-Michael Winterbottom’s The Road To Guantanamo
-the rise and fall of the NY Cosmos, Once in a Lifetime
–Colour Me Kubrick
-Sydney Pollack’ Sketches of Frank Gehry
–Clarissa directs it all
-Richard E. Grant’s Wah-Wah
-Rosie Perez can‘t jump co-direct?
-Jeff Garlin’s I Want Someone to Eat Cheese With
–Jonestown: The Life and Death of Peoples Temple
-Bruce McCulloch’s Comeback Season
–Vinny Chase’s short film (no word if Siagon did the score or not)
–something with the hotness that is Catalina Sandino Moreno

How dare someone outbid me on an autographed Jim Larranaga bidness card

every single Jennifer Connelly nude scene known to man + a$$ 2 a$$ [NSFW]

Anyone else miss hot-arsed Chloë, circa 1995?

Not even her NSFW ass of today can make her fappable

Mike Wallace wanted to do Pat Nixon

Muzak to get ya to holla for Lolla:
-‘Crazy’ by Gnarls Barkley [d or Prince mash-up]
-‘Bongo Bong’ by Manu Chao [d]
-‘Oh Yeah’ by The Subways [d]
-‘Mary Ann’ by Manishevitz [d]
-‘Hello Drama’ by What Made Milwaukee Famous [d]

Skeletor ass rapes Britney Spears statue! How PRO-LIFEic [NSFW?]

Who knew that Stephen Stucker was dead. Wait, who’s Stephen Stucker? Did he f@#k Nadine Coyle? Who? And what did Horton hear?

Community Shelter Planning, starring Gene Hackman [PCL Dumps]

A (Not So) Complete History of Band Tattoos

Philippine Basketball Association’s teams [Cheez WizzzNutzzz]

Classic Trailers, hincluding a bunch of ‘cockian ones [VaGinaM]

The Big Labowski

Two More Playboy Cartoonists

Operation McFly

unaired Wonder Showzen pilot

Hate the whole ‘ladies first philosophy? Like everything else, blame the Jews [AskY]

Meat Dishes Men Like

A Bluegrass Tribute to Air

Phat Girlz screeningz

Sacred Destinations, for you, me, and comic book characters, regardless of their religious affiliation. Whaaaaaaaaa, The Thing/Benjamin Jacob Grimm was Jewish?

(sorry about all the Jew stuff today, but maybe I’m juss a lil vexed about ABC ditchin the Heston version of The Ten Commandments for the brand spankin new Dougray Scott one)

Made of Brawn-steen (aka The Brickhouse aka the Thighther in Law) placed 8th at the Corned Beef and Cabbage Competition. Next stop, after the toilet, eating his own hand

ABC News hearts up-to date vagina

We hearts Jenny McCarthy’s nekkid sister Amy [NSFW]

and Diana’s penchant for guinea pigs

and unknown Hilton cousin Farrah Aldjufrie too

Get AYDS [My Man Marvkus]

Mountain Dew Fisting [NSFW vis Ef Everytang]

And we gots ourshelfs yet another candidate for the next The Kid, but will this one be able to pass all three of the challenges: 1st, the breath of Gawd. Only the penitent man will pass. 2nd, the word of Gawd, only in the footsteps of Gawd will he proceed. 3rd, the path of Gawd, only in the leap from the lion’s head, eating corn, will he prove his worth. Good luck, and remember, choose wisely

of the
flat chestedness
cutetacious facededness
winona* dopplegangerededness
and all around perfectedness ness
that be

as we said on Marzo 16th, and as we continue to say today…

Alas, I was always dreaming the Irish dream: drinking all day and bombing all night, and waking up each and every morning to the smell of Irish Spring and the taste of Lucky Charms. Now I finally get to turn that dream into a reality as I ship off for a qwikie tweakend to the Emerald Isle, avec p’rents. And spank the good lord I is, cause ever since I returned from my study some broads programme in London, back in the ’98, I declared a personal jihad (the new/old ‘personal jesus’) against that nasty-arsed watered-downed American version of Guinness (don’t even bother convincevaughnning me otherwise cause beer in the US and A blows broken snowblowers). I think me mouth may hexplode when I lock sips with that motor oil from its point of origin. They say you can’t go home again, and that if you lived here you’d already be home, and that dirty vaginas often smell like tunafish, but, er, uh, what was I saying? I dunno, have great weekend kids, and here’s some Irish crap for you to fap all over.

The History of St. Patrick’s Day, from the Hitler Channel

Sinéad O’Connor booed at a Bob Dylan tribute concert + her take on Nirvana’s ‘All Apologies’ [d-lode]

Hmmmmmmmmmm, so there are such things as Irish Jews, eh? Too bad the mos famous one of them all was fictional

How to Make Yer Own Leprechaun Hat

X-Ent’s The Quest For Shamrock Shakes!

‘Lucky Clovers‘, from The Ben Stiller Show

‘Jump Around’ – House of Pain [d-lode] or [vid]

Nick Cannon’s ‘Leprechaun Rap’

O’Brien’s Irish Cottage, in Sterling Heights, Michigan

Pat O’Brien

The First & Last thIghrish Film Festival!

Len Bias, the greatest Celtic that never waz [vid 1 | vid 2]

GO GEORGE MASON!!

and

Why would Gold Bond bang these lizadies

Look at the brightside, maybe this will open more doors and the thighs of Lara Logan

Lohag Would Go Topless for Oscar. Too bad the same init true for the Portwoman. But then again, unlike Her Former Royal Thighness the I, Natty Lite-weight doesn’t dig on grouchy garbage men. But then again, she did dress like an elephant for Elmo. No word on if she tickled it, or not, or tickles in general, with anything French, or not

Ricky Gervais looks back (not in anger) on his Seona Dancing days, vid stiz

Will the Gorillaz tour DC’s virtual stadium?

Everyone’s mos flavorite French reporter Melissa Theuriau, sans habillement [that’s Au Bon Pain for NSFW par MoodyHotties]

Luther Vandross doesn’t live, but his sangwich does

stripper_polaroids’ stripper polaroids [par Pee See Randle El]

Which Came First… besides me on May 1st

Who knew the Fruit of the Loom guys branched out into furniture design?

I always wanted to know what ‘Thighs Wide Shut’ sounded like

Top 10 Strangest Lego Creations

Anyone out theres knows where I can get these elf shoes I used to rock in HS, in size 10, 10.5, or heleven? If you do, I’ll even fuck your mother!

Free Hooters

VIDEO of Michael Larson, Whammy enemy #1

Coal Black and de Sebben Dwarfs

And, Nancy O’Brills, O’ how I O in your good O’name and graven image night after night. Stay faptastic, and the only respectable and delectable person on tabloid TV…