Thighs Wide Shut

Mrs Henderson Presents
Not To Be Confused With The Boob Movie!!
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Dude, all I have to say write is: Dame Judi Dench, a tit load of tits, and Bob Hoskins’ furry b-day suit.

Recommended for those who like: yams, cans, jugs, and DAMES, and naked wookies named Bob Hoskins!!

Possible Porno Name: Mrs Henderson Prevents Hairy Bush

Unsatisfied with this? Netflix the Emily Hottimer jazzlecise Bright Young Things, or Showgirls, if yer feelin Verhoevenish

Apt MPupil3: ‘Vera’ by Pink Floyd [d-lode]

Picture Pages: Florence Henderson presents herself [NSFW]

John Grisham’s Jizzum (aka Verdict): Jeepers Worth A Peepers, although it was almost Breast In Show if Breast In Show was solely based on breasts per minute of screentime divided by hair pie R squared

The New World
Not So A-Maize-‘n
View Trailer

The first thirty minutes, pure cinema. The rest? Oh, juss the latest snooze-o-rama from director Terrence Malick, including, but not the limited too: the love story boring of Walk The Line, with less guitars and more Pocahontas selling Land o’ Lakes whilst being chased and bedded by Colin Farrell and Christian Bale thru fields of corn, also known as maize, but not Maze in your face, or null space [d-lode Anime theme song madness NOW, + JUNKY BOY too!]. Zzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzz. Actually the movie colonized itself when Captain Georg von Trapp left Colin Farrell in charge of America while he went back to England for shitty weather and dentistry! AND YOU KNOW WHAT HAPPENS NEXT! He calls up his buddies Kid Rock and Scott Stapp and they start filming Girl Gone Bukkake 2112, in the NEW WORLD!! OH SNAP! Insert some native Americans, and presto, zzzzzzzzzzz with native Americans!

Recommended for those who like: the Apoclaptpo trailer, Chief Wahoo, or kinfolk of Jewel, of photobooth NSFWness fame

Possible Porno Name: The Prude Girl Visits The Nude World

Unsatisfied with this? Netflix Master And Commander: The Far Side of the World

Apt MPupil3: ‘Hail To The Redskins’ by The Redskins Band [d-lode via That Guy]

Picture Pages: thanks to Google I know now now know that The Thin Red Zzzzz is nuttin but a 2nd-rate Señor Spielbergo cigarrillo del marajuana

John Grisham’s Jizzum (aka Verdict): Sum Merit But No Stinkin Wisconsin Badgers

Blessed be you Daniel Snyder, the new King of the Jews, and your King of the Jews money that you shoot out of your hands, like Spiderman, and mcgrab anyone you want for your fantasy squad/my Redskins. May the gadget plays be with us… and TWS.org as well, which ranks 2nd in ‘gadget play’ intersleuthing

Poopied be you Twerps, who blow worser than a 36 minute Andy Warhol movie. Is it football season yet?

Bye bye Boom Boom, for without he, there would be no (non-musical) Hanson brothers, + a mucho belated parking of the life of shaftman Gordon Parks

Jon Stewart, the next Andy Rooney? Dan Rather not or so?

Quite amazed that only 30ish seconds were dedicated to characters watching movies and/or television on last night’s season premmy of The Sopranos, and cause of it, I’ve got opto-mizzum for whats to come… although going fwd, I hope we see less of Maradona‘s cocksmoking doppleganger. As for that new show that followed it… Zzzzzzzzzzzzzzz fest to the mth degree!!! Sorry, but not even Jeanne Trippletits [NSFW] can save it, or even if they had this girl with three boobies [NSFW]. All-dough they do get + 1 gold stars for having Nap Dyna‘s Deb working at a place called Deb’s

Yous a male and have a bunch of brothers? Yer most likely gay, and therefore will probably have a great shot at creating an insanely popular blog

Czech accountant, Jana Tylova, becomethes the first ever Countess Soduku at the WSPC. CZECH out JT with the rest of her country’s squad…

How do u take your NSFW d’Abo? Maryam or Olivia?

Speaking of… He May Be A Demented, Twisted, Compulsively Masturbating Shitbag, But He’s Our Demented, Twisted, Compulsively Masturbating Shitbag

Top Ten Worst SNL Cast Members of All Time [MogillaMask]

If you only look at one pictorial review of The Hills Have Eyes, make it this one

Ugly Duke girls try to dispel ugly Duke girl myth [Gulf of Sonkin]

Where video games go when they die [Lief Ericsson’s Posse]

Whose Boobs (Strikes Back) Part 2

Something for the lizadies: lots of wet men, by way of Rammstein’s latest video [NSFW]

[WTFOMGZ!]

Past Champions from the World Livestock Auctioneer C’ships

Juicy Fruit ads will never be dullski with Mr Z de la Roachclip’s dang right copy

Fity more of these and we may juss achieve peace in the Middle East: a 12 foot plate of hummus [Lil Red Honey Rider’s Hood]

Fity bottles of these and I may actually get laid: Whiff, the poop odor eliminator

‘Forever Young’ – Alphaville [d-lode]

On The Menu Today: Horse Penis And Testicles With A Chilli Dip [L-ism]

‘God came down from Heaven and made people quote Fletch‘

How To Make A Duct Tape Wallet

paintmeblue’s photos

CILF (it’s like MILF, but with corn!) [BVSC]

How do you says I want to de-core your apple in Russian? [NSFW]

Hoth to host the the Winter Olympics in 2014? …so that’s what all those probe droids were really doing, scouting for giant slalom and super-g locales! [1st site soundy vis World Wide Wangsta]

And if there really is a Gawd, then HE’ll never let our mos flavorite Druish America Princess, Sasha Cohen, and her nude naked camel toe, crossbreed with any of the following (bruce) suitors

[via Baroness SC]

Zzzzzzzzzzz

Unofficial Oscar Tally Hos

Gays – 4
Gayisha – 3
Pimps – 1
Tsotsi – 1
Palestinians – 0
Jews and Fake Jews – 0

ZZzzzzzzzzzzzz

You’d still f%^k her

Look familiar?

Sure does!!! It’s a a screencap from last night’s stage performance of the Crash song ‘In The Deep’!!

YOU GO Gustavo Santaolalla and your ‘The Wings’ [d-lode]!! I may juss have to eat at Hooters tomorrow, or play the Capcom unclassic Legendary Wings!!!

Zzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzz

Fortunately, this time Jessica Alba did not refer to Paul Newman as Connecticut

I say poo to Facts of Life handyman George Burnett winning gold. Mindy Cohn worked her ass off for years… and all she has is a big ass to show for it!! He grows a beard and everyone throws accolades at em. It’s not fair. Like Blair Warner humping Bonnie Blair on the Warner Brothers lot!!

Zzzzzzzzzzzzzz

Unanswered Questions:

1) Why isn’t DJ Qualls the DJ for Three 6 Mafia?

2) And if it’s ‘Hard Out Here For A Pimp’ [d-lode], is it hard being DJ Qualls?

I guess snot

3) And can we replace Dolly Parton’s name with Amy Lumet‘s

when telling the joke,
‘Have you seen Dolly Parton’s shoes?
[pause]
Neither has she!‘

4) Stephen Colbert’s video VOs were better than anything Jon Stewart uddered. Might I suggest Borat for next year’s hosting honors? I mean, Senor Spielbergo loves em. SEXY TIME!!!

and lastly

5) Who Flung Poo?

Boo. And zzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzz

And Ahhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh Boogzzz Powell/Diner!

Pee Es- Puns rule! If you don’t like em, we’ll have to lock you away in the punitentiary and throw away the key lime pie!

What’s a better use of time?

Watching all 123 minutes of Sideways?

Or spending 5 minutes, alone, with this Sasha Baroness Cohen non-camel toe naked nude grundle labia snapple…

+ 264 mo.

+ the Baroness!!!

Me can’t love yub

A wonderful showzen has been given a 2nd life, and soapfully that equates to more Trevor bits with Beat Kids

Think Shelden Williams and Mena Suvari are both locks for this year’s all head team?

New Adventures in Hi-Fi [via G’hattan]

Jennifer Ellison Defines The Perfect Pair of Breasts… like she would know anything about boobs

I wonder if they display the black dude who comes to life in Madonna’s ‘Like A Prayer’ video at the National Great Blacks In Wax Museum

Victoria Beckham ‘Like A Prayer’ [d-lode]

‘sam cassell large penis’, we #2!

Who was the Mona Lisa? And who hasn’t fingerbanged Mona Robinson?

The HAWTEST site on the internet [via Hal Lindenbaum]

& if yous werent in the know, b-day ribcakes are the new d-day urinal cakes!

For once, a Coachella rumor turned out to be true!! Still doesn’t change the fact that this year’s line-up blows almost as much as Tool and whatever the next Killers album will be!

[hot info via Megbot]

The Winter LIMPics are dunn like Nora. Zzzzzzzzzzzz. Next time, they should eliminate time zones so everyone can watch the not so grassy knolls at the same time and not on tape delame. Go Latvia!!!

Boo-nus: Photochop Monday?

‘I think American TV is the best in the world. I knew ‘The Office’ wouldn’t be ruined by these people, but I know American shows would be ruined by English people. We’re not as good as you. … American TV for me, as Randy Jackson would say, is da bomb. ‘ –Ricky G

Could the future Liam Gallagher/Charlotte Church collab be holier than thou?

Rudy meets Corky = real hoop dreams [via Double Veeski & Burger King & Queen]

Hugo ‘Hurley’ Reyes = Harry ‘Beyonce’ Knowles?

The return of Ice-T? I’m still praying for the day he teams up with Lemonade to form Arnold Palmer

Jesse Metcalfe (Lawn Boy) banging Nadine Coyle (Thighs Mistake Girl)?

Willa Holland > Bloggers In Amsterdam

And how come they didn’t invite the Hay Master to Edam (which is the new Eden)?

Max, the Devil, and proprietor of Max’s Video shop from The Lost Boys loves dat a$$

Sly no longer on the sly?

Zach Moore and Mandy Braff’s (sorry, but I refuse to call em something very bloggish like Broore or Mraff) Tiffany wedding registry [via The Soup]

Muss See Tee Vee: The Ivankatice

Muss Take Her Clothes Off:

And by the lame, Karen O’s full name is Karen Orzolek, and she’s not only an earsore and an eyesore, but multimediasore! Did I mention she’s a hobag and I’d rather suck this [NSFW] than let her touch mine [‘this’ via Skylar]

How un-ghetto is Trick My Truck? I’d say about 1/16th less than Pimp My Slip ‘N Slide, eh?

What could possib-bly make Nicage emote the Karen O face?

Tits amazin what two a-bombs can do to a country [NSFW muss ness that has nothing to do with real bombs but bombs as in boobs and a kitten and aight already, juss click the damn link via Dr Falada]

The Ketchup Effect teaser [via Shabby]

The 50 Best Robots Ever

YTMND: Ownd [via Tom Wellington The Greatest Livng Actor’s Fan Club President]

Newbower’s bestest fan ever

FREE PANCAKES! In honor of Marwanicur’s B-day! [via BVS is the new CVS]

Add ‘sasha cohen cock’ & ‘sasha cohen underarms’ to the list of things we don’t have on this site………. yet! Aldough it’s a purty safe bet you’ll never mt everestist find ‘slutskaya nipples’ anywhere near these thighswideshut

Lou flings Poo

Posting will probably be a lil miller lite in the loafers this week as we richard gear up for March 8th. Grin and bear with us kids!

Anywhozitz, tis never too late to enter our Oscar Pool. $10 to make ya holla. Winner eats balls. Enter here. Group Name: House of Wax Dat Ass Password: neckbeard. You suck if you don’t join the frayed carpet. And if you do, I’ll see if I can get you in to the palace to touch our gal’s brows, and if you pay $5, you can touch mine too!