Tag Archives: Sherlock Holmes

Sherlock, Stock
& Two Smoking Barrels

Sherlock Holmes:
A Game of Shadows

The Final Problem
Official Website | Trailers & Mo
PG-13 | 129 min

Don’t know how we thought the first one was passable, cause it spectretro, it was poo-diddly-poo. You take one look at brilliant modern day Cumberpatched Sherlock and juss know that Guy Ritchie doesn’t deserve to do a thang with Arthur Conan Doyle’s foils & foibles!!!  Well, like it or not, he and Robert Downey Jr and Jude Law are back in a new misadventure and it’s somehow all passable again.  CRAP!  This crap should be crap, so how is it watchable, again?  Jared Harris as Professor James Moriarty is a very very nice touch, and including Noomi Rapace and Stephen Fry in on the fun kinda adds to the fun, even if their characters are kinda marginalized.  And?  Well, they killed off Rachel McAdams’ character, which also added to the fun, cause her character was les würst.  But isn’t any movie that includes a chess scene between two rivals juss one giant sh$t show?  It is, but one that’s covered in fun.  CRAP!

Verdictgo: very low end Jeepers Worth A Peepers

Sherkock is currently playing close to wherever you call Holmes 

and until next thyme the balcony is clothed…

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Thighs Wide Telly 2010

was last year really the first year we had a TV awards??? no time for looking back, and only time for looking forward. hactually, this is a look back, at what was bestest in 2010 TV, and while some songs remain the same, new fun can always be found on the tube boobs!!!

1. Misfits (E4, England)

Remember how Heroes sputtered in its 2nd season. Yeah, that really sucked, so spankfully there wasn’t any sophomore slump for the British ASBO-super hero super dooooper show Misfits, which juss earned our choice for the bestest of the bestest FOR THE SECOND YEAR IN A ROW!!!! it’s not even fair to call this a TV show. it’s like watching the dopest and innovative movie week after week that doesn’t play in a theater!!! don’t wanna say too much more about what actually happens, hispecially since you/us Americans probably never even heard about this show (outside of our glowing tweets), and that’s the biggest crying shame, but you can do something about it. (CLICK THE ‘it’ TO DO SOMETHING ABOUT IT!!! trust us). oh, and after all the Clockwork Orange location love, The Shining refs almos shined even mo!

2. 30 for 30 (ESPN)

So what if the top 2 picks are the same ones as last year, cause nothing new or used was remotely comparable. That was quite the honor for 30 for 30 last year, considering only 7 of the 30 docs aired, and so watching 23 more entries in this glorious and unprecedented series was more of a delight than watching Judith Light and Tony Danza fight to see Who’s The Boss. Sure, not all of them were winners, but a majority of them were. Stand outs include Guru of Go, The 16th Man (it was better than Invictus!!!), June 17, 1994, The Two Escobars and Into the Wind. Bestestest news of all? ESPN are liars and have 3 more above the 30 to drop on us in 2011, including the one we’ve been waiting for mostest

3. Sherlock (BBC/PBS)

No wonder this aired on PBS’ Masterpiece Theater, cause the three 90-minute episodes were juss that, theater thats be a masterpiece!!!!!!! Only question is, when can we see the next batch?

4. The Increasingly Poor Decisions of Todd Margaret (IFC)

Life a bit empty and a lot less funny in an Arrested Development-less world? Todd Margaret fills the void, and then some, and awesome with David Cross to bear/bare. Mos deaf = funniest moment on TV in 2010!!! Anyone know where we can buy a can of Thunder Muscle?

5. Party Down (Starz)

With Jane Lynch trading in her pink bowtie for large checks over on Glee, we thought for a moment that Party Down would go nowhere but down. Well who knew that newbie Megan Mullally could be such a valuable employee of funny (see the ep ‘Nick DiCintio’s Orgy Night’ for proof)? Also, 2192989278 bonus points for employing Fred Savage as a director!!! Sadly, all good things that have no audience muss come to an end, and after its cancellation, Party Down enters the ranks of Twin Peaks and the British Office as two season wonders that keep us wondering what if…

6. This Is England ’86 (Channel 4, England)

Imagine if one of yer mos flavorite movies of the past decade relaunched the partying 3 years after the fact, but on the small screen, and yet still kicked major major major ballistics. That is eggzactly what happened with This Is England and its equally killah lil TV brother This Is England ’86!!! Good news is that ’90 is a go!

7. The Innetweeners (E4, England)

Will, Jay, Neil & Simon are the new John, Paul, George & Ringo. Emily, Emily & Hannah are the newest additions to our JO collection. Thanks for the 3 beyond solid seasons lads & lasses. Any chance the movie plays in America? Would be better than all the American Pies combined times 32837!!!

8. Hard Knocks: The New York
Jets
and 24/7 Penguins/Capitals: Road to the NHL Winter
Classic
(both HBO)

Rex Ryan & Bruce Brodeau both deserve their own channels (or a buddy cop comedy), and 238824354 refrigerators. Lets go eat a goddam snack.

9. Dexter (Showtime)

How do you top last year’s Lithgow’s afterglow? You don’t, but Johnny Lee Miller as a mysterious motivation speaker is motivation enuff to keep Dexter on our list. Think most people hated Lumen. We didn’t. She made Dexter happy, and a happy Dexter is a happy we. Also, LOVED the Six Feet Under ref in Ep 1

10. Kendra (E!)

Who knew being a football wife of a journeyman NFL player could be so heartbreaking? This is the only reality show worth watching

11. Entourage (HBO)

Stuff finally happened!!!!! 3 cheers to coke snorting & Sasha Grey’s boobs (& too hairy bush?? [SFW])!! Yes, this was the 11th best show in TV in 2010. Yes, it was more betterer this year than Mad Men

speaking of…

other solid forms of entertainments: In Treatment, Mad Men, The Tudors, Breaking Bad, Making & Selling Jeans In America, Community, Rubicon, Chilrden’s Hospital, Modern Family, Real Sports With Bryant Gumbel, Real World: New Orleans, Boardwalk Empire, The Big C, Skins, Eastbound & Down, The Walking Dead, Outsouced and yes, Desperate Housewives

+

bone-yes moments

Sally Draper/Kiernan Shipka!!!!

boo to the end of at The Movies, but yea to a talking Ebert!!

The Lost finale sucked, and so did the last 2 seasons

Temple Grandin was the bestest TV movie of the year. so dang good in fact that they should have released it as a movie in theaters!!

Skins season underwhelms, but still…

+ killing off one of their wurstest characters, and the way that they did, was a masterstroke!!!

Psych is watchable thanks to its Twin Peaks flavored ep!!

Carrie Fisher’s darling one-woman autobiographical show Wishful Drinking was so so entertaining that we regret not seeing it on Broadway

The Hub is added to our cable line ups, and The Wonder Years re-enters our lives

– bestest re-discovery of a lost show from our
childhood: Robin of Sherwood

+ love the soundtrack by The Clannad!!!

Deep Roy is the only one truly standing tall on this season’s Eastbound

– the return of these forgetten kids!!! &
Kilborn (& Christine Lakin)

Rasta Monsta

a reason for Glee‘s being

– hotties Erin Kaplan, Isabel, the 2nd Mrs Draper, half face, & Lake Bell Torrance Coombs AND all the Tudors hottie hotness over the yearz

wait a second, did you LOOK AT THIS PAINTINGGGGG????????????????????????????????????

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Scotland Yarns!!!

if yous knows us, yous already darns wells knows hows much we suffer from Anglophilia.  you would be wise to catch the sickness too, cause the ye Olde Countrye is churning out some mighty stunning material these days, which you can anglo-file under ‘A’ for AWWWWWWWWWWWESOME.  one such filmed entertainment that has so captured our hearts and thighs is the 3 part modern-day Sherlock Holmes mini-series called…

SHERLOCK!!!

it’s, as the English say, ‘brilliant’!!!  5reals, yo!!!  6reals, yo!!!!  it makes Guy Ritchie’s Holmes look like a broken Holmes!!!!  and it stars 2-time Fenella Woolgar Bestest Names Award winner Benedict Cumberbatch as the super sleuth IN MODERN TIMESSSSS!!!!!  and not only does he own Holmes in the name game, but he owns the role too.  he relishes in it so dangs much that he may have to start his own relish company!!!!!!!!!! CUMBERBITCHES!!!  and to make matters even bester, his Watson is played by the wisecrackin Martin Freeman, aka Tim from The Office, aka Bilbo!!!!!!!!!!!!!!  the beyond thighnamic duo haves so many clues that it’s no mystery how fanastic this mini-series be!!! and it’s all so elementary my dear Emma Watson, and there’s no face like Holmes + a million other Holmes clichés and puns!!  and the good news for you is that if you missed it on BBC this past summer or on PBS for the past 3 weeks, shiz is being released on DVD like NOW and STUFF!!!

but wait, there’s mohr from their shores!

pissed at how lame Running Wilde is as a pseudo-answer to the Arrested Development blues??  yeah, we three, but be pissed no further lads, and turn your attentions to IFC’s abroad broad comedy…

The Increasingly Poor Decisions of Todd Margaret!!!!!!!

David Cross crosses every London Bridge and glorifies every refarted British stereotype as an American fish well out of the chippy water.  it’s, as the English say, ‘brilliant’!!!  9reals.  it’s the perfect combo of British dry wit and American slapstickery.  it’s also the funniest show we’ve seen in 2010.  and remember, we think NOTHING is funny, so that statement hactually means something! + Neil from The Inbetweeners (the 2nd funniest show of 2010) is on it AND the theme song is by Johnny Marr.  and luckily for you, IFC renewed it for a 2nd season AND be re-airing all 6 eps starting this Friday.  make it happen future Anglophiliacs!!!

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Boiling The Author’s Cannon

Sherlock Holmes
Holmes Sliced
Trailers & Mo | Official Website

We cannot squarely place the blame on director Guy Ritchie‘s shoulder for the purty much tame new Sherlock Holmes ‘re-imagining’ cause he had nuttin to do with the plotting (hello/goodbye Michael Robert Johnson, Anthony Peckham and Simon Kinberg). Ritchie’s rock n rolla style applied to one of literary’s greatest characters actually does give the material an edge of freshness, but what kind of case can he present to us if the case he and Holmes were handed was devoid of a mystery (or ANY mystery tat all!!) from the get go, and thus not very worthy of solving. Think the ‘mystery’ had something to do with an occultist murderer (played by Mark Strong), who gets killed and then is brought back to life to do… more murders, for some reason or something??? can you say snooze fest 1891?

Despite it’s paint by numbers Victorianessness, it’s the action and wordplay that keeps this baby purring. And it’s kinda hard not to have fun watching Robert Downey Jr‘s Holmes (a kindred spirit of Depp as Ichabod in Sleepy Hollow) mince words with a perfectly paired Jude Law‘s Doc Watson, as they tackle whatever bad guys lay in their wake. Juss wish the bad guys had something more to them besides juss being bad. Wish Rachel McAdams‘ Holmes love interest character was something more than juss being a bad character. Wish Eddie Marsan was using his gruff to teach driving, again! What, did Santa 5gets to read our wishlist for a Holmes movie?

Holmes ends with a gaping thighs wide open door for further adventures (and maybe some real mystery!), and if the studio is happy with the strong opening BO weekend bucks, then it mos likely will happen, and if it does then we certainly hope that whomever’s piecing it together will try and outdo this lesser From Hell that graced our eyes and disgraced our intelligence

Love sherLockDown: we’ve never seen mo than 7 minutes of a Basil Rathbone joint, sooooo that makes Barry Levinson/Chris Columbus/Spielbergo’s udderly franztastic Young Sherlock Holmes our mos flavorite of Holmes alones!! incidentally, that film starred Nicholas Rowe as the young SH, who would later appear as a bonhead stoner in Guy’s Lock, Stock and Two Smoking Barrels. and while we’re at it, YSH marked the very first movie to incorporate a CGI character, done up by the Pixar folks (!!!!!) when they were still a part of ILM!!

Verdictgo: (try and) forget about the non-mystery mystery + the girl, and you still gots yerself something that’s Jeepers Somewhat Worth A Peepers in an It’s not so Complicated kinda brainless kinda fun kinda way

Holmes is currently sherlocked at a theater near jews

and until next thyme the balcony is clothed…

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