Tag Archives: Jack Huston

Bale & Hardly

American Hustle
Hustle & (Mostly) Blows
Official Website | Trailers & Mo
R | 129 min

american hustle

American Hustle sorta tells the story of the Abscam FBI sting operation that took place in the late 70s/early 80s. Some of the names (and details) have been changed to protect the imbeciles. Some of it is entertaining, but most of it is like one REALLLLLLLLLLY long run on sentence that keeps on going and going and going.  Director  and writer  swing for Goodfellas-ian heights, but kinda blows it like 2001’s Blow – all 70s scenery, but not much beyond the sniffy, sweaty surface.  But oh, those surfaces…

like…

hey, if you’ve always wanted to see 1/3rd of good-too-shoes ‘s boobs (I never wanted to), then this is the boobie/movie for you!

amy adams boobs hustle

or see  smile in a movie, for the first time ever!!!

jeremy renner

or be depressed watching  give his all again (this time with curls!!!), and think about how much bullsh!t it was that he didn’t win best actor Oscar last year for the much better Silver Linings Playbook

curlers cooper

and then watch his Oscar-winning co-star J-bLaw blah us to death with her blah acting and eyes that bore her and we to tears

jlaw eyes

or JO to the thought of a mustache ride from Jack Huston!!!

jack stache

or watch Alessandro Nivola steal the show, in like a grand total of 6 minutes that he’s in the movie

Alessandro Nivola hustle

and look, we all LOVE Louis CK and all, but lets face it, he can’t act

louis ck faces

THE ARABIC VERSION OF ‘WHITE RABBIT’!!!

but nothing and nobody tops Christian Bale as a combed-over, hairy chested, big gutted Jewish dude, who hides behind those tinted shades OH SOOOOO WELLL.  BALE!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!  Man, CB is such a fcuking great actor.  So much so that I’m starting to think that the Batman movies were a waste of his time.  Anyone can be Batman (I’m sure even Affleck can’t ruin Batman), and since anyone can, we lost the time that Bale coulda been in other movies, like ones were he coulda played some overly intense mother-effer, who’s quietly ready to explode at any given moment.  Bless you Bale.  May you be ready to smolder at any given moment in a zillion movies to come

bale hustle

Verdictgo:  Sum Merit But No Stinkin Badges

Hustle American’t currently at a theater near jews

and until next thyme the balcony is clothed…

2 Comments

Off The Road

Kill Your Darlings 
Beat, Off
Official Website | Trailers & Mo
R | 104 min

kill your darlings

Ginsberg, Kerouac, Burroughs and Carr.  One of these names does not belong… to the annuals of history, but does to the Beat Generation‘s history.  Lucien Carr was the supposed ‘glue’ of the crew.  Without him, would the other three have crossed paths, and beat on???  Who knows, but in ‘ inspired, but tiring directorial debut – Kill Your Darlings – Carr’s story is driven to the forefront, and he’s eventually driven to murder!!!!!!!!  Oooooh, sounds intriguing!  It is, but it somehow doesn’t end up being all that intriguing (as a movie)

What does it end up being like?  Muppet Babies for the Beat Generation stizz!!  Looks, there’s beardless, skinny Allen Ginsberg (), discovering all kinds of things at college thanks to new found literary ‘maybe more than friends’ friend Lucien Carr (, always giving it his de-All), and their buddies Jack Kerouac (pretty boy ) and spacey mumblecored William S Burroughs ().  They drink!  They smoke!  They listen to jazz!  The reject what their teachers are teaching them!  They pull pranks!  They flirt with being gay!  Oh my, so much going on in the mid-1940s!  I KNOW!!!  But trouble lurks, in the form of David Kammerer (), a man obsessed with Lucien.  After endless years of unwanted attention and advances, Lucien can no longer withstand his predator, and so one knife-fight later, Kammerer dies, Carr gets incarcerated, and the other three Beat-ers go on to infamy.  Carr becomes a footnote and here we are, and yet, I feel like we’re nowhere.  Just a Muppet Babies take on young dudes about to become men.  Beat on?  More like beat off

Cross Roads:  is the only man on earth to play both Allen Ginsburg (I’m Not There) and his father Louis Ginsberg (Darlings)

ginsburgs-david-cross-louis

Verdictgo: Sum Merit But No Stinkin Badges

Darlings doesn’t exactly kill it, today in NY & LA only, and elsewhere elsehwhen

and until next thyme the balcony is clothed…

Lucien, Jack, Allen & Bill

Lucien, Jack, Allen & Bill

1 Comment

The Man Who Was Younger Lazy-Eye

Travis
Webster Hall
September 23rd

Travis is the best.  Me don’t be needing to tell you how one of their concerts would goesz, considering I saw two of the dudes without the other two dudes and it ended up being third greatestest concert I had ever seen.  They have a new album out. It’s Travis-y lite.  Less rocking, but still solid stuff

here’s the…

SetlistMother / Sing / Selfish Jean / Pipe Dreams / Moving / Love Will Come Through / Driftwood / Warning Sign / Re-Offender / Where You Stand / My Eyes / Reminder / Side / Writing To Reach You / Closer / Slide Show / Blue Flashing Light / Turn 

Encore - Good Feeling  / Flowers in the Window (Acoustic) / All I Want To Do Is Rock / Why Does It Always Rain On Me? / Mother (played again for a music video recording) 

anywho, there be two things I really want to make note of…

1) bassist Dougie Payne is married to Kelly Macdonald, who is on Boardwalk Empire.  guess who was at the show supporting Mr Macdonald?  None other than castmates Steve Buscemi and Jack Huston (who makes rubber face man still look pretty).  I’d do all of these people.  so would you

and

2) speaking of Dougie Payne, apparently he’s gone with a more mature hairdo these days, going up with his locks instead of down, and now he looks exactly like a younger, happier version of one of my MOIST flavorite non-speaking 1 second characters to ever appear on The Officethe Michael Scott mnemonically nicknamed ‘Lazy Eye’ fella in the ‘Lecture Circuit‘ episode (couldn’t find the name of the actual actor, so if you are this actor and you are reading this, hello, I love you, now won’t you tell me your name)

dougie payne 2

 lazy eye2

dougie payne

lazy eye 3 

dougie p 

laazy eye office

0 Comments

You Don’t Know Jack Huston

John Huston’s grandson Jack is a failing apprentice of the Rick Baker School of Special Makeup Effects

Jack’s uncle Danny knew Jack

1 Comment

eXTReMe Tracker