Thighs Wide Shut

2) baseball was a much more fun sport when controversy centered around stoopid shiz like Billy Ripken’s bat. Good thing then that Jesus invented American football and the NFC, where awful lives on and so do my Skins payoff hopes. Sorry Andy, but yer Giants stink!

3) for your consideration, a movie no one is considering: Zodiac

4) we’re having a hard time fingering out which of these Marcia Cross pics are more vom inducing: this fubared Melrose hair one or these NSFW uglies of her showering in her backyard

5) nuttin makes us more glad than the long overdue return of American Gladiators. Although there won’t be any Malibus or co-stars from The Lost Boys, it appears that the producers did do a fine job of finding the new Gladiators. Meet em here and here. And we’d love for our meat to meet with Helgggga, aka Robin Coleman

7) Gossip Girl’s Chace Crawford is impossibly beautiful, and a gay man’s wet dream cum true

8) the only NSFW animated gif you need to see this week

9) this peanut looks like a duck [b3ta]

10) Lucy Pinder turns 24 this Thursday, and instead of us giving her gifts, she put hers on display in UK’s Maxim. bubble YUM!

[the NSFW rest]

Belarusian Movie Posters

I don’t care for The Simpsons anymo, but after watching the thumcredible new trailer for their long overdue flick, I gave it another go last nite. While the laffs were absent, as they have been for the past 5 years, I did enjoy their Ali G homage

NSFW Cindy Margolis pics, from a time when no one asked for such a thang

the prestigious Visual Effects Society (who?) unveils the 50 Most Influential Visual Effects Films of All Time, where The Fifth Element and Darby O’Gill and the Little People can finally share an honor

Andy Rooney totally JOs to Leslie Stahl

bull, goat & lamb fries festival draws 300 in Wisc. No word if Andy Farmer was one of the lucky few or not

Turkish Superman

bounty huntin never tasted so good

[Pakula Shaker]

the John Brown soundboard

the least clicked-on NSFW Celebrity Movie Archive link mt EVERest and kilimanjaro: Cathy Bates’ hot tub scene from About Schmidt. If there was a Gawd, those snaps wouldn’t eggsist, and snaps of this would

Kool-Aided Pickles [Brickhouse]

tits not as good as when he used that metal thing to take that metal booger thang outta his head, but it will do

•Love Bugs, which are NSFAnyone’sEyes

and he’s no Rusty Kuntz, cause he’s…

•

Still Sour Grapes
& Gripes
& Still Gr8 @ 88
(which should not to be confused with
88 Keys or Eighty Eight, Kentucky)
everyone’s mos flavorite
Hokie & Thrasher Hater
Andrew
Aitken
Rooney

by the looks of it, her Current Royal Thighness may be headed to Hagville, where our first HRT, Lohag, rules the school

song dat currently makin me the opposite of sober? The Shirley Bassey-e sassy-e Amy Winehouse’s ‘Rehab’ [d|vid]

go ahead, I dare you to send Andy Rooney your crap

while the Wii is slowly rollin out the oldies thru their virtual console dazzle (with some Commodore 64 titles comin in the future!), you can buy this thang and say g-bye to blowing your cartridges

Luscious Jackson’s Jill Cunniff goes solo. This news would be shocking if Luscious Jackson were still a band or if Jill Cuniff was riding my face like the Belmont Stakes. By the gay, her first LJ side-project, Kostars, is near and dear to my farts

Hootie & The Blowfishburger [Made of Brawn-steeeen]

Can you breastfeed if you have implants?

Can playing with a Slinky change the channels on your TV set?

Google’s patent search, although not endorsed by my father and brother, both patent laywers

OhMiBod [Girlhattan]

fess up, which one of you were searchin for ‘my sweet tits breasts anus naked butt thighs nude vagina hot camel toe poon tang clan heroes in a half shell‘

Wisconsin Man Runs Over, Eats Seven-Legged Transgendered Deer [Cruisespanko]

and the movie to beat for ’08’s Oscars? No, not Harry Pots 5 [trailer] or even Buy Apple or Die Hard [trailer], but the flick with a flying dog that’s got more Air than Bud, Underdog [Pakula Shaker]!

Peace The Fork Out
to
the slickest
father of The Omen nanny
who could do
one-armed push-ups AND win Oscars
sell antifreeze
like it was nobody’s bidness
and drink ‘n yell solo
better than Han
Volodymyr ‘Walter Jack Palance’ Palahniuk

1919 – 2006

also PTFO to Gerald Levert, Shea ‘Ghetto’ Stadium, and to the Redskins season (now you know why I didnt make mention of that FLUKE last Sunday), UNLESS they make the right move and start Jason Campbell, which I’ve been basically callin for since week 2!!

and 60 Minutes does Ed Bradley proper, includin Andy Rooney

and to turn them frowns upside down, like wees was Lionel Kiddie City (where I once was caught stealing 90210 trading cards from)…

in honor of Borat’s 2nd week as king of the box office, despite several lawsuits, and the auctioning of the Back To The Future II hoverboard, here lies Borat’s, by far, mos memorable appearance on US television: learning how to make a bed with Martha Stewart

Wagamama Boston Opening Spring 2007

and if that wasn’t enuff for ya, get yer own uncut copy of Little Superstar: The Movie, or whatever tis called!

spank yous HotBoxPizzaFan#1, Chillary G, TMZ, and Ben Silverbreakdancin Machine