Lions And Tigers And A$$ Tears, Oh My!
27. Oct, 2008 
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Detroit gets a purty bad rap. How do we know this? Every time we mentioned that we were heading there for the weekend, the listener responded, why? Well, 36 hours of non-stop Michigan runings around proved that the answer is why not? Three key reasons why not: A) it’s the home of Peabs, although he was outta town B) we weren’t shot at and/or killed, and C) we weren’t there long enuff to hate it, so in the end, we loved it!
and hit up Miller’s Bar
and had one of their tasty burgers
where you pay on the honor system
so we ordered 15 burgers and claimed we had only one
although to be honest, it aint got nuttin on Wendy’s
but then again, most burgers aint gotz nuttin on Wendy’s
we visited The Henry Ford
which is like a place of stuff
that the Smithsonian didn’t want or have room for
nothing sez history awful/awesomeness
like the car JFK was whacked in
and the chair Abe Lincoln got plugged in
sadly John Wilkes’ Photobooth wasn’t there
lotsa neon!
but no Deion or the Belmonts
this is what ye olde stewardessesses had to do to get ready
they forgot to ask them to shave their bushes
this is where Rosa Parks sat and changed stuffs for good
we feel like such an Outkast
Jewanicure was hungry like a wolf
and danced with some bizatch named Rio, on the sand
the nuclear family
with some d-bag with 18 necks
who you gonna call?
hopefully the police so they can arrest
the people making Ghostbusters III
holy grail! we choose wisely!!
but in Latin, ‘your mother’s a ho-bag‘ is spelled with a ‘i’?
someone give Luke a hand…
…job!!
wow, an actual replica of our big johnson
ride at your own risk
no trip to the D is complete w/out hitting up
The Motown Musuem
tis almos morer importanted than visiting Sun Records in Memphis
and jussta reminder to you alls…
visit Graceland before they die
fake Diana Ross was da bomb shiz
and so is her company, Ho Town Records
who doesn’t love a giant fist?
maybe this fist is to honor their boy RoboCop
Pizzapapalis was poppin-alis!
but really rocked cause you could play
Keno while scarfing down a pie
Don’t forget it Jake, cause it’s Greektown
which hactually wasn’t a ghetto casino
even though you think it would be
apparently
hot dogs in Rock City
are called Coney Island
although they juss pale imitations of Nathan’s
and wees only talkin about the Nathan’s in the real Coney
not some garbage Nathan’s you eat on the Jersey Turnpike
and apparently its good for bidness to have
two rival spots right next to each other
American‘s dogs weren’t that bad
and the interior was mad cool
but also mad empty
cause everyone was next door at the slightly better
Lafayette, munchin on their formica countertops
are you sh%tting in yer pants juss lookin at these pics?
anywho, the real reason for visiting was the Skins-Lions tilt
and we muss say, Ford Field is one amazin place to see a game
and an amazin place to see Randel El and James Thrash stretch!
and the Danny was on hand
lookin like Big Boy
but we’ve always loved him
and have stood by him
cause no one tries harder than the Danny
and bless him and his odd coaching search
which begat
ZORNNNNNNNNNNNNNN!!!!!!
the game was too close for comfort
in a non-Jim J Bullock kinda way
but the good guys won
leaving the Lions winless
and their fans with bags on their head
which was more entertaining than the movie Baghead
visit Detroit!
don’t be scared!
although we can’t promise that you’ll live!
