these are things AND stuffs from this past weekend

Raiders of the Lost Ark:
The Adaptation

sometimes we’re ahead of the curve, and other times we’re behind the curve (NEVER IN THE MIDDLE OF THE CURVE!!!).  well, it doesn’t matter where you are in the curve when it comes to the (basically) shot-for-shot remake of Raiders of the Lost Ark that these Mississippi kids (Chris Strompolos, Eric Zala and Jayson Lamb) made over the course of 8 years.  we heard about it less than a decade ago and it took us that long to finally see it (there’s no DVD available, and the charity screenings are rare), and it might take you a zillion years before you do, but even if yer 110 years old when you finally do-do, you’ll feel like yer 12 years old all over again, when taking in this improbable masterpiece that’s like Super 8, but like more realer, more awesomer, and even more awesomer cause it’s Raiders of The Lost Ark made by kids and they light themselves on fire and everything!!!

This is like the dream of every young person (we included),  but most young persons don’t turn dreams into reality (we still included), but these young persons did and made their dreams come true, and now there dreams are even coming morer truer!!  And everyone agrees it’s the shiz-balls (Eli Roth!), and it’s even been approved by the gods (Señor Spielbergo AND Turkeyneck Lucas!).  Strompolos & Zala were on hand at the screening for a Q&A, and they have as much enthusiasm for the film now as they did when theys was 12 and making it.  amaze-balls

watch the opening scene!!

+ some mo pics!

&

we took in these two eggggzibits and they were lovely and they were free, which made them even lovelier!!

George Tooker (1920-2011): Reality Returns as a Dream at The DC Moore Gallery

this guy is damn goods, and his paintings are like creepy Edward Hopper flazzles, and he died earlier this year, and we didn’t give him peace the forks out props, and so we are sorry, but not as sorry as you if you don’t see this egggggzibit

&

then there’s Picasso, who’s like an even more overrateder Fellini, but…

Picasso and Marie-Therese: L’amour fou at The Gagosian Gallery

is a mos fabulous collection of his paintings, sculptures and photos inspired by his muse & lover, with that super-pronounced nose, and it is all a seen to be sighted!!!

check out this CBS Sunday Morn piece on them and the show.  you know if they cover something, it’s gotta be good (cept for Jimmy Fallon)

&

Mile End!

man, them were some dang sweet-ass meats treats that beats all others!!!!!

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The Catechism Cataclysm
Official Website | Trailers & Mo
75 min

The good?

We saw it outdoors and seeing movies outdoors is the bestestestest (thanks yous Rooftop Films & BAMcinemaFest), AND it starred Steve Little (Eastbound‘s Stevie Janowski), who can make us laugh juss by smiling.  It doesn’t even matter what he says, cause the way he sez things is somehow betterer than the way other people say the same eggzact things

The bad?

Any bit of the movie that doesn’t let Steve be Stevie, like when other characters talk and this 75 minute movie starts to feels like it’s 750 minutes, and like these Japanese girls show up and like explode heads or something.  it’s a mess, and all the fun & sorta good bits are at the beginning, before it heads down a river without a paddle, or a point

Only Steve Little diehards should apply when it gets released this fall, and so…

Verdictgo: Sum Merit But No Stinkin Badges

Peace The Forks Out

to

Ryan Matthew

‘Won &‘

Dunn

1977 – 2011

+

Clemonsade

That Lib Madder

The Coaster

Peter Graves’ smoking brother

& that central comedic Norm Macdonald show – BOO!

Awfully Photoshopped Russian Wedding Pictures

The Monkees
Beacon Theater
June 16th

We saw Davy Jones’ sassy solo show 2 years ago and Micky Dolenz kick it at Coney Island last summer (sharing a bill with the Beach Boys + John Stamos, The Turtles, and Mark Lindsay of Paul Revere of the Raiders… wow, that was quite a mammoth oldies bash, eh?).  Both of them concerts were sirprizingly beyond solid nostalgia trips filled with that oh so sweet and manufactured Monkees sound.  Well, what would it be like then to see them play together, with Peter Tork added for plenty of good measure (Mike Nesmith took another pass on a reunion cash grab, since he’s swimming in Liquid Paper money)?  Uh, how bout helllllaa sweet awesome rad super mint???!!!  Ells yeahhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh!!!

Even though they played a bunch of songs that rewarded the more dedicated fan, Davy, Micky & Petey totally gave the people what they wanted – the greatest hits (luckily for us all, they didn’t play ‘DW Washburn’) and a whole lot of fun(ny).  Could you ask for anything more?  Well, we did want them to play ‘Porpoise Song’ for 3 hours straight, but you can’t always get what you want, right?  Well, sometimes, but not this time!

It’s amazing to think that we have only 2 Beatles left on earth, but still got all four Monkees.  Sh%t is crazy like that, but we muss celebrate the living while we still have them with us, even if they is fake Beatles.  Do yourself a favor and support old peoples like these guys and other old peoples (Brian Wilson!!!) who can still kick out the jams (although we still refuse to see Bob Dylan play)

a question for you…

what happens when The Monkeemobile loses its wheel?

Bridesmaids
Wedding Our Pants
Official Website | Trailers & Mo
R | 125 min

Oh my gosh!  Who knew that women could be funny AND have a movie in which to show it?  AND it came from Judd Apatow, the man who makes so many man comedies… that aren’t really all THAT funny, although everyone thinks they are.  But we’re not going to waste your time griping about Judd Apatow like we usually do, cause for once he got the funny write (although what did he do besides put his name on it?).  YEAH WOMEN!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Bridesmaids is dangs funny (and rememberrrrrrrrrr… it takes a lot to make us laffffff!!!).  It’s not a great movie by any imagination of the stretch (pretty standard story stuff here – a woman trying to find love), but who cares!!  Kristen Wiig does her Wiig thang and Maya Rudolph doesn’t really do anything, and come to think of it, neither does Wendi McLendon-Covey or Ellie Kemper, even if they are great company.  Rose Byrne plays an unfun bitch (doesn’t she get sick of that?  we’re starting to), and Jon Hamm plays a way fun a$$hole.  Melissa McCarthy steals the show (she needs her own movie, and probably will get one), and some British people are in it (like Chris O’Dowd) cause they’re probably cheaper (and funnier) than Jason Segel.  But why the poop jokes? WHY?  No man wants to even think of a woman pooping.  Do you womens?  Wait, do any womens read this site?  If so, will you marry us?

Lovey Covey:  there’s juss something so hot about Wendi

(probably cause she was Michael Scott’s one-night stand in Canada)

Verdictgo: Jeepers Mos Def Worth A Peepers

Bridesmaids marries women & laughter at a theater near jews

and until next thyme the balcony is clothed…