Top TENenbaums
But We Does
A Dirty Dozen
This Year
1)
Munich2)
The Squid and The Whale3)
Crash4)
Everything Is Illuminated5)
Crónicas6)
Mysterious Skin7)
Enron: The Smartest Guys In The Room8)
Me and You and Everyone We Know9)
Brokeback Mountain10)
Dear Frankie11)
Match Point 12)
The Island
Many A Honor Blackmanable Mentions: Downfall, North Country, Constant Gardner, Paradise Now, Ballad of Jack and Rose, Bee Season, Sin City, Junebug, Cinderella Man, Breakfast on Pluto, Pride & Prejudice, 2046, and My Summer of Love
Mooovies I Really Wanted To See But Never Did: Dark Water, Kingdom of Heaven, Lord of War, The Weather Man, The New World (it was out in 2005 for 2 seconds), and The Legend of Zorro (regardless of how bad they say it is)
2nd Annual
Thighs Wide
Movie Awards
They Coulda Been A Contender
Walk The Line
Hitchhiker’s Guide To The Galaxy
The Interpreter
The Brothers Grimm
Bestest Quote
Jack Twist: [referring to Ennis]
I wish I knew how to quit you.
Wurstest Quote
Darth:
Noooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooo!!![YTMND:
1,
2,
3,
4,
5,
6, &
7]
M Night Shamalamadingdong’s
BratWurstest Twist of The Year
[GIFt via XANA Claus]
The Woman Being Chased By The Killer
IS THE KILLER
in
Haute Tension
i guess i didnt review it,
oh well!
Guiltiest Pleasures Starring HRTnesses
That Made Me Pleasures Myself
Guiltily
Domino & House of Wax
World’s Mos Pointless Movie About Sewing That I Forced Myself To Watch Only Cause My Parents Paid For My Admission
Sequins
Funniest Movie of the Year
n/a
Better Luck Next Year!!
CGI That Binks Stinks
Wurser Than Jar Jar
General Grievous
& his über annoying nagging cough
Tatum O’Neal
Youngin Bestness Award
Flora Cross & Georgie Henley
Mos Thumbcredibly Beautiful
Yet Confusing Movie
About A Year Since
2001
2046
Replacer of Carrot Top
As Chief of Box Office Poison
Eugene Levy
as seen in
The Man
Cheaper The Dozen 2
& the straight to video American Pie: Band Camp
Bestest Impression of a
Wes Anderson Soundtrack
From A Movie
Produced By
Wes Anderson
‘Family Conference’ [d-lode]
by Dean Wareham & Britta Phillips
BratWurstest 20 Minutes
of A Speilbergo Movie Ever
Andy Dufresne
in War of The Worlds
Fenella Woolgar
Bestest Names Award
Romola Garai
Haguy Wigdor
& Skandar Keynes
Trailers That Got Me
Mo Jazzed Than Jazzercise
Narnia (teaser)
Sin City (trailer 1)
Domino
War of the Worlds
Ths Island
Songs From Trailers
That Make Me Want To Smoke
Bongs With Norman Mailer
‘Changes’ [
d-lode]
by 2PAC
from
Coach Carter trailer
‘The Wings’ [d-lode + remix]
by Gustavo Santaolalla
from Brokeback Mountain trailer
‘Jesus Walks’ [d-lode]
by Kanye West
from Jarhead teaser
‘Put A Spell On You’ [d-lode + more]
by Creedence
from The Ballad of Jack & Rose trailer
‘Nirvana’ [d-lode]
by El Bosco
from Millions trailer
‘God Moving Over The Face Of The Waters’ [d-lode]
by Moby
from Syriana trailer
& Heat, One Day In September, and the new Jack Bauer/Intel/Mac commerish
Hotness I Never Knew Eggsisted
But Spankfully Do Now
Camilla Belle
Carey Mulligan
& Nicole Vicius
The Gus van Sant
Most Pretentious/Wurstest Movie
That I Watched Wit Trent
A History of Violence
The Only Reason To See
Into The Blue
Alba’s Ass In Water
The Only Reason To See
The Fantastic Four
Alba’s Ass In Spandex
Not The Only Reason To See Sin City
But Should Be
Alba’s Ass In Leather
+ Lasso Goodness
Bestest Movies I Netflixed
Porniest Names
My Genius Brain Ponyed Up
On Your Knees Season
(Bee Season)
München Box
(Munich)
Scatman Crothers Begins To Jazz’s All Over Yer Momma’s Face
(Batman Begins)
My Elevated Shaft In Your Swallows
(Elevator To The Gallows)
A Hysterectomy of Violence
(A History of Violence)
BangRon (Jeremy): The Dirtiest Sluts In The Room
(Enron: The Smartest Guys In The Room)
George Teague Bangs Ordinary Gentleman
(League of Ordinary Gentlemen)
Mysterious Skin
(Mysterious Skin)
House of Wax Dat Ass
(House of Wax)
The Cockcicles of Hornyia: Laying The Bitch On The Whoredrobe
(DUH)
Grizzly Man Tits
(Grizzly Man)
2046nine
(2046)
The Death to Smoochy Award
for Worstest Picture of the Year
Be Cool
Stay
Hide and Seek
Boogeyman
The Amityville Horror
& The Aristocrats
Movies To Look For in 2006
5 Fast, 5 Furious
Swiss Miss, Gang Bang
Mmm-Bop: Hanson Warriors
The Sisterhood of the Traveling Wilburys
Howl, Harold, & Kumar Move Into White Castle
Me saw something close to 100 movies in the theater this year. How’d you do, losers? Or were you too busy listening to that Sufjan Stevens album to go see anything? Fine, be that way. But don’t fergot the
’04, the
’03, and the
’02, or Papa and Mumsy Master’s picks for the ’05! They have grrrrrrrrrrreat taste… snatchurally/boviously, they is my parents
Movies Mumsy Ejoyed1)
Brokeback Mountain2)
Mysterious Skin3)
Crash4)
Capote5)
Breakfast On Pluto6)
The Squid and The Whale7) 5 way tie*
Paradise Now,
Off The Map,
The Edukators,
King Kong,
Ladies In Lavender
*She could not separate cause she thought all these movies are on the same level
Mumsy’s Worst MoviesBewitchedLand of the DeadThe Brothers GrimmFun With Dick and Jane “Sorry Jim–Why did you pick this film to star in?”
– Mumsy Master
Mumsy’s Most DisappointingCharlie And the Chocolate Factory“Sorry Johnny Depp–You didn’t play this character well.”
– Mumsy Master
Papa’s Frtias1)
Touch the Sound2)
Murderball3)
Dear Frankie4)
Breakfast on Pluto5)
Paradise Now6)
Mysterious Skin7)
Hustle & Flow8)
Memory of a Killer9)
3-Iron10)
Sin City11)
Go for Zucker
Papa’s PropsBest Actor: Philip Seymour Hoffman,
CapoteBest Soundtrack:
The Squid and The WhaleMost Disappointing (not the worst):
Duce Bigillow
Does Europe [sic]
Best Holocost Film:
Ninth DayMost Twists:
Dot the I
Hope you enjoyed that folks. As we say goo-bye, I’d like to send out some boos to the Golden Globes, the NFL Playoffs, and anyone who puts Wedding Crashers or The 40-Year Old Virgin on their Top Ten lists.
17. Jan, 2006 
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