Tag Archives: Paz de la Huerta

Little Seizures III

Enter The Void
Void Where Prohibited
Official Website | Trailers & Mo

Remember last April when we all discovered the ‘single greatestestest set of opening credits mt EVERest and Erebus!!!!!’??  Here they be again, if your brain need re-frying

Well, who had any idea what kind of movie could follow that!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!  And the answer is basically indescribable, undefinable (Lady On The Lake set to the sounds of Daft Punk?), unwatchable, unbelievable, and undeniable!!!!  It is Gaspar Noé‘s follow-up to his un-follow-upable Irreversible (the movie with the 9 minute rape scene… that we actually took our parents to go and see.  FACT!): Enter The Void, and it is THE MOST FU&KED-UP MOVIE WE HAVE EVER SEEN, and it is one of the most hellish on earthish movie experiences we have ever endured (and we’ve sat thru a lot of painful stuff. Trash Humpers anyone?), and we cannot recommend that you see it whatsoever, and yet it might not only be the movie of the year, but maybe one of cinema’s all time greatestsssttsss visual accomplishments EVERRRRRRRRRRRRsss.  Yes, it’s that contradictory, and it will dick with yer mind and senses and it will make you explode internally (implode?).  Same thing will be true when viewed 100 years from now (film students will ogle and marvel and study the heck outta dem seamless whooping crane shots from place to place).  If you do dare to enter Enter The Void, go sober, leave wasted.  You will feel sick.  We did, literally, to our stomachs.  GROSS!!!  You will never look at neon colors the same again.  You will never want to go to Tokyo.  You will fear anyone who has a crotch that glows.  You will never want to see an extreme close-up of a penis ever again, even if you love penises AND extreme close-ups. If you don’t smoke cigarettes, this movie will make you a 6 pack a day smoker.  If you can’t deal with the 5 minute MTV-banned video of Prodigy’s ‘Smack My Bitch Up’ [NSFW] then DO NOT ENTER cause it’s like that times 32.2 and with more neon AND boobs (Paz de la Huerta‘s, natch!) and drugs and bitch smackings ups and banananananananaszzzzzzzzzzzz!!!!!!!!!!!!

O M F Gaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaawd.  Who gives this guy money to make movies????????  Whomever it is, please stop AND also don’t ever stop.  We firmly believe that all movies should be entertaining, but being visually lynched and raped is sometimes the exception to the rule that rulesssssssssssss!  AYE CARAYMBBBBBBBBBBBBBASSSSSSSSSS!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!  We head aches juss thinking about it!!!  Hell, we hate this movie so much that we don’t ever want to see it again, but love it cause we hate it and it’s more challenging than trying to watch both Changeling movies on the Challenger!!!  What a beautiful car wreck, and oh yeah, beware of the car wreck!!!!!!  Death!!!!  Life after death!!!!  Abortions!!!! Birth!!!! Rebirth!!!!  Afterbirth!!!!  A hotel of people f$%king with glowing crotches!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!  Enter The Void, exit this review!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

More Voids To Enter: peep this numb-minding music vid Noé made for ‘Si Mince’ by Arielle

Verdictgo: the impossible… Slit Yer Eyes Out Repoopulous AND Breast In Show

Enter The Void today only in NY & LA, and on IFC on-demand on 9/29! (although if you can find the courage to ever see it, the big screen is the way to go)

and until next thyme the balcony is clothed…

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