The peoples hath spoken and apparently the peoples don't like their Jim Carrey serious (The Majestic, Man on the Moon, Eternal Sunshine... that movie was mad loved but he got no love) or scary (The Number 23, Lemony Snicket... possibly his single greatest performance/role). Well the peoples are flat(chested) out wrong (cept for probably in regards to The #23, although we dont thinks anyone would admit to seeing it) cause Carrey is a wonderfully unique talent that always gives his audience 111% entertainment, regardless of the genre he's acting up in, or if the movie's actually any good. Obviously he's at his best when dishing out the yuks, so since we all can agree on that then you'll be as pleased as punch to know that his latest, Yes Man, puts him right back where we want em, the laugh factory. The trailer makes it out to be Liar Liar 2 (and in general a laaaaaame broad comedy), but this Peyton Reed (Bring It On, Down With Love, and the writer of The Back To The Future ride???) directed film based off of British journalist/funnyman Danny Wallace's book of the same name (here's an article about him and the movie) quickly surpasses it's gimmickry and finds symmetry as a perfect Jim Carrey comedy, with a dash of rom sweetly added to the com. It's all simple stuffs, but it's simply funny stuffs, so what more could you ask for? Well you can forget about Carrey's two generic onscreen BFFs (Bradley Cooper and Danny Masterson) and instead focus on the terrific trio supporting him: his lovely love interest (Zooey Deschanel, back in our good graces after her poo faces in The Happening), his grampy guru (Terence Stamp, who everyone should kneel before) and his bubbly boss who throws the bestest themed bashes (the thighlarious Rhys Darby, for those who haven't already been thighlaried by him as Murray the always present manager on FOTC). With all these overly heavy award season movies clogging multiplexes and farthouse cinemas out there, it's a pleasure to have a distraction like Yes Man to say yes to. Wees hoping Carrey will one day say yes to a movie where he's not allowed to talk. Can you imagine what he could do with a role like that? Yes we can
On Solid Sound: the Yes Man soundtrack rocks the cashbar, featuring 9 songs by the Eels (and their 2 bestest tunes ever, 'Flyswatter' [d] and 'The Sound Of Fear') and 4 by the Zooey's band within the movie, Munchausen By Proxy. Click hear to here 2 of them Munchy tracks Verdictgo: Jeepers Mos Def Worth A Peepers
The Valerie Plame affair practically begs itself to be turned into a movie (so does the David Beckham-Rebecca Loos [NSFW] affair, on whatever the British equivalent of Cinemax is). And while we wait for the Doug Liman-Nicole Kidman treatment to hit the big screen, take a dip with Nothing But the Truth, a factually fictional fully functional film that delves deep down into the depths of journalism and their deep throats (what timing, with Mark Felt's death). The Contender director Rod Lurie goes all All The President's Men and delivers an All The President's Men Against A Woman. That woman is Rachel Armstrong (Kate Beckinsale, like we've never seen her before... mostly w/o make-up, trying to 'ugly' it up for your Academy consideration), a DC newspaper reporter who outs a CIA operative (Vera Farmiga, secretly and not so secretly becoming one of our bestest young although not so young actresses around), whose husband publicly questioned the ultimately false information that lead the almost assassinated US President to wage war on Venezuela (what is this, a stripped from the headlines Law & Order episode?), and all HELL'Enfant plaza breaks loose. The govmint want to know who blabbed these govmint secrets and so they put special prosecutor Matt Dillon in charge to bust balls (c'mon, this is the same guy who hired Bill Murray as his lawyer in a case vs the two girls he took a NSFW champagne bath with!!!). Becks won't reveal her source and a judge and Matt Dillon put her in jail until she talks the talks. They think she'll eventually relent, but she has no intention of relenting and stays in jail not relenting. While she suffers, but stays tuffs on the inside, Alan Alda as her lawyer (what, no Bill Murray?), Angela Bassett as her editor and Noah Wyle as like the newspaper's lawyer or stuff try to get her out, and David Schwimmer as her husband and that kid from Dexter as her kid, but not from Dexter try to live life w/o moms and her high ideals. The rest doesn't exactly play out like reality, and that's actually a good thing, cause having someone nicknamed after a Muppet gettin a commuted sentence isn't a very cinematic conclusion. It gets a lil twisty at the very end, but it's one of them nice lil ones, not one of those M Night Shamaladingdong ones that make you want to throw women down a flight of stairs (we do not condone the throwing of women down a flight of stairs, but it is a phrase that pays)
France has been very kind to us Freedom Fryers this year with its exports in filmedfilmthingies (wtf Spain? you're totally slacking!), and The Class closes us out on a thigh note. Winner of this year's Palme d'Or, The Class is about a inner city multicultural class and its outercity white bread teacher. The film is free of the usual Hollywood gangsta throw downs, as teach tries to make his students, even the unteachable ones, stand and almost deliver, until he reaches his own breaking point. If you had a friend and they were about to become a teacher but you really don't think that they should become a teacher then you should take that person thinking about becoming a teacher to this movie that probably will make them not want to become a teacher... in France... in the inner city. We barely leave the confines of the school's grounds, so it feels a bit like detention, one you pay for, and one you should pay to see
Sextuple Threat: writer/star François Bégaudeau was the lead singer of a punk band called Zabriskie Pont, wrote a fictional novel about Mick Jagger and is the movie critic for France's Playboy. when this guy's done with his life we'd like to have it Verdictgo: Jeepers Mos Def Worth A Peepers
Yes Men opens everywhere today, while Truth rocks out in NY/LA, where The Class will play for one week only... before returning to NY/LA in late January
stay tuned kiddies, cause there's plenty more reviews to come in the next week
Life. Death. Faith. Friendship. Family. Loyalty. Race relations. The economy. The ol' American Way. Suburban decay. Doing the right thing. And even the Detroit Lions (sorta). All of these hot topics are flawlessly weaved into Gran Torino, Clint Eastwood's 30th film as a director, and what may ultimately be his final screen performance (SAY IT AINT SO!). In what is w/o question one of the bestest films of the year, GT may also be it's mos funniest (eat your farts out Judd Apatow!). It's also one of the finest fictional movies about the state of America today that we've seen in quite sum thyme... that happens to be hidden in the open of this vigilante street justice genre flick. Clint plays Walt Kowalski, a grizzled old Korean War vet (what a stretch!) who embodies the sarcastic loathing of Andy Rooney and the razor/racist sharp tongue of Archie Bunker (only Easty could make 7 zillion Asian stereotyped quips and not only get away with it, but make ya laff yer face off... unless yer name is Spike Lee). His wife's recently passed on, his white neighbors have long since moved away and he doesn't have much to look forward to, cept sittin on his porch sipping Pabst Blue Ribbon and indulging in any form of tobacco (hactually sounds like the good life to us!). He doesn't want anything to do with his new immigrant neighbors... that is until his hand is (magnum) forced. Local gangs start harassing a defenseless boy and his sister (amateur, yet effective enuff performances by Bee Vang and Ahney Her) and Clint comes to their rescue. Each time he extends his sword, he lowers his shield and in turn starts to open his heart. He becomes more of a father figure to these kids than he had ever been to his own. It sounds like sum dang cheesy stuff, but lessthenone, the cheese works and tastes grrrrreat! So what about the car in the title? Juss another thing for us to give the film an accolade for: bestest use of a Gran Torino in a movie this century! Then again Starsky & Hutch wasn't much competition in that category... although Gran Torino coulda been the greatesteest movie mt EVERest had it had Brande Roderick undressing
In Part 1 of Steven Soderbergh's two part Che movie, Che is in Cuba helping Cubans overthrow other Cubans who don't have cool facial hair like they do. The main dude leading these revolutionary Cubans is Fidel Castro. He's played by the Mexican dude on Weeds. Che is played by Benicio Del Toro. Che wasn't Cuban. Neither is Del Toro. Che was from Argentina. Del Toro is from Puerto Rico. Del Toro was born to play Che. Much more so than Omar Sherif. He looks the part. He is the part. The part can't save the whole. Soderbergh wasn't born to direct a Che movie. You learn absolutely nothing about Che. Nada. Nunca (OK, you do learn that he has asthma). Guess it's not that type of movie... that type of movie that mos people would rather see where it tells the entire extraordinary story of an extraordinary man, not repetitive chapters in one long jungle book. We see Che. We see Che with people. The peoples listen to him. He's usually in the jungle, building Gilligan's Isle type dwellings, teaching people how to read, treating sick people cause he was a doctor. He hides in the jungle. He eats in the jungle. He poops in the jungle. We don't see him poop. Think of anything goings on in a jungle and Che did it. This part of Che is 58% jungle. 29% takes place in NY. The NY percentile was shot in black and white and Che is red all over... cause he's a Communist! Nothing against jungles, but the NY bits are the most bittable bitties. Back in Cuba guns are fired. People are shot. Che and co take over cities. Catalina Sandino Moreno shows up. She worships Che. We worship her. She's full of grace. She gives nice face. We're bored. Crap, there's a second part? It better be better than this part that isn't so better!
Back In The Che: the early exploits of Che's life were put on display in the solid Gael García Bernal starring Motorcycle Diaries. After watching the film we were thirsty for mo Che and wanted to see another movie that continued the rest of the story. Soderbergh wasn't able to fulfill that wish (or our other wish for him to stop working with Julia Roberts in general). Spanfulkly there's always Wikipedia to fall back on when films fail to inform us of things we want to be informed on
Verdictgo: Sum Merit But No Stinking Badgers
Part II: Guerrilla Borelivia
Part II is not better than ezra or Part I. If you muss see one part of this monster(ous) film, see Part I and skip Part II. Part two has no NY distractions to split up the action. The action in Part II is 98% of Che doing the same exact things that he was doing in the jungles of Cuba but now he's doing them in the mountains of Bolivia, but with less disciples and less success. Why is he here? Do people want him here? Do they juss wanna join the Che Guevara Cool Facial Hair Club For Men? Dunno. Never really explained well. Lola from Run Herself Run is in it. She's a foreigner called Tania helping the cause (see 'Patty Cakes' below). Why? No clue. Back to the mountains. Che is walking. Che is talking. Che is taking a dump. Sorry, you don't get to see any dumps in Part II either. You do get to see Catalina Sandino Moreno, but only for like 8 seconds. You don't get to see her naked, or poop. What a waste. This second part is so beyonds borings and thunderdome that it makes Wendy & Lucy look like a movie where Jason Statham puts porters in trans! You know Che movie is mad sleepy and hollow when you want Che to die within the first 1/2 an hour of a 3290493 hour movie cause then the movie would be over. You walk away from this epic snoozefest and can't figure out if Che was a good or a bad man. You actually can't figure out anything about Che other than he was able to live better in nature more better than the Swiss Family Robinson. Why is this movie (when seens together as one) 4 +++ hour longs and filled with basically nothings? Cut out 4 of them hours and the +++ minutes make a hamazin short movie! Oh yeah, Matt Damon cameos in this part. Luckily Scott Caan doesn't appear. On second thought Scott Cann could have brought some funs to Bolivia. We want Sodbergh flicks more like Bubble, not like ones that burst
Patty Cakes: kidnap victim-turned Symbionese Liberation Army sympathizer Patty Hearst took on the nom de guerre of Tania, in honor of Che's helper friend chick. Skip this Guerrilla flick and instead czech out the doc Guerrilla, all about Patty's plight
Verdictgo: Slit Your Eyes Out Repoopulous
Che is currently playing as one long arsed movie in NY/LA for one week only. It will open as two movies in major cities on 1/9/09 and then elsewhere elsewhen
who's Lash? that guy in the photo. why is he there? he's leaving LAX so he can have him some threeway lesbian SEX. so who's Lash? our mos flavorite Bethesdaer turned Burlingamer. who is Lash? that's for us to know (+ about maybe 8 people who read this websight) and for you to not to know. gawd bless you Lash. only you could force us to post Lohag paparazzi photos years after we gave up on her after she gave up on us after Disney gave up on her after Disney gave up on Captain EO at Epcot Center after apricots gave up on being everyone's mos flavorite Armenian plum
'I have never fooled around with my eyebrows. Susie [Rooney's secrteary] fools around with my hair sometimes. To get ready to tape this piece for television, I comb my hair. But, if I do anything more, I look like someone else.' [Andy Answers His Mail]
that only answers one of our questions about his eyebrows. another question is who would win in an eyebrow fight between him and George Whipple The III? and another: do the caterpillar drapes match the carpet? and one not related to his brows: does Susie make house calls?
