Thighs Wide Shut Thighs Wide Shut

Friday, February 19

A Pocket Full of Posers

Happy Tears
Poop Art
Official Website | Trailer & Mo

Mitchell Lichtenstein may bester be known as Roy's boy, but not in our book. In our book, which is bound in pleather, he's the dude who made that decent enuff movie about the girl who has a vagina with teeth that will forever have a place in our heart all cause of this brief but brilliant performance by a dirty old man. We wouldn't say that our eggspectations were riding high or even anywhere near medium for whatever his follow-up feature was gonna be (unless it was a Teeth prequel involving that dirty old man), but the possibilities of Parker Posey and Demi Moore playing daughters and caretakers to their dear old demented Rip Torn dad, and his whacked-out golddigging Ellen Barkin hobag had us thinking another House of YES!!! Guess we shoulda thought otherwise, as in house of NO!!!!!!!

Don't know how Lichtenstein couldn't make this work, with such aces in his hand, but nothing here feels fleshed out, beyond how zany the characters are suppose to appear (they're like cooky cousins of the Little Ms Poopshoot clan, stuck at home, instead of the road). Lost in the shuffle is a much more interesting side-story involving Posey's husband (Dexter season 1's Christian Camargo), who is the son of a renowned deceased artist, having an all-life crisis living in his pop's shadow. They say you should write what you know, and that bit sounds more up his alley than what we're chiefly presented with instead. Hopefully Lich knows a lot about dirty old men, cause we'd really like to see that Teeth prequel with the dirty old man

Lichtey Mind Splitting!: papa's House I, which sits on the lawn of DC's National Gallery of Art, muss be seen to be disbelieved!

Verdictgo: purty much Slit Yer Eyes Out Repoopulous

Tears opens today in limited release

and until next thyme the balcony is clothed...