Thighs Wide Shut Thighs Wide Shut

Friday, June 27

Project XYZ

House Un Very-American Activities Committee
Trailers & Mo

In the entire history of the Academy Awards, only once did a fake person win an Oscar (although there have been a total of 5 faux peeps nominated, most recently the Coen Bros' boy Roderick Jaynes). The winner in question was Robert Rich and it was for writing 1965's The Brave One. Rich actually existed (he was the producer of the film's nephew), but his name was used as a front for celebrated writer Dalton Trumbo (perhaps best known for his novel Johnny Got His Gun). Trumbo is one of the infamous Hollywood Ten who were blacklisted in 1947 for defiantly refusing to give up any information to the House Un-American Activities Committee determined to rid the motion picture industry of Communist influence. Through his compassionate and witty letters to fellow blacklisted friends (and even one he sent to the telephone company), read allowed by such talents as David Strathairn, Brian Dennehy, Paul Giamatti and Michael Douglas, mixed with yer usual talking head interviews and archival footage and photos, this udderly compelling documentary chronicles the period that followed, where he struggled to keep his family fed by writing film screenplays under numerous pseudonyms. Eventually, with the help of a few big time filmmakers who wanted to give credit where credit was do, the barriers started to break down and Trumbo no longer had to hide behind a different name, but the damage had already been done. You have to admire Trumbo who stuck by his belief in free speech and certainly knew his write from his wrong

Blacklist Cinema: czech out the Woody Allen-Zero Mostel flick The Front, which was put together by people affected by the blacklist, including its screenwriter, Walter Bernstein, its director, Martin Ritt, and even Mostel himself

Verdictgo: Breast In Show

Gunnin' for That #1 Spot
Hoop Realities
Trailers & Mo

Kevin Love, Michael Beasley, Jerryd Bayless and Donte’ Greene are four names purty familiar with anyone who follows basketball these days, hispecially after they were all taken in the first round of the NBA's 2008 draft. That wasn't always the case, unless your some crazy diehard guy who makes a living detailing the prospects of adolescents. Once upon a time, 2006 to be exact, them four + 20 other high school ballers from across the country (three others were also drafted) convened at Harlem's famed Rucker Park for the first annual Elite 24 Hoops Classic. Adam Yauch, better known as Beastie Boy MCA, decided to document the event and profiled 8 of the players (the four mentioned above + Dukie Kyle Singler and three guys still in high school). The cinematography is delicious, the soundtrack is slammin and it's all around a kinetic piece of work that is sure to appeal to a very wide audience. The doc works overtime by raising some valid questions about the media and overhyping of tomorrow's stars, but we kinda wish it delved a little deeper than it did. Nonetheless, this is a good sign of things to come from Yauch, who honed his skills as his alter ego Nathaniel Hörnblowér, the music video director, according to, of 18 Beastie Boys videos + their own concert film Awesome, I Fuckin' Shot That!. And since you're dying to know, our personal flavorite Hörnblowér vids are the animated versh of 'Shadrach' and the fish-eye bestness of 'Shake Your Rump'

Tomorrow Comes Today: the third annual game is set for August 22nd. see you there

Verdictgo: Jeepers Worth A Peepers

The Last Mistress
(Une Vieille Maîtresse)

Charmed & Dangerous Liaisons
Trailers & Mo

The Last Mistress, Catherine Breillat's adaptation of the scandalous 19th-century novel by a French dude with a really French name (Jules Amédée Barbey d'Aurevilly), centers around Asia Argento as a decade-long f&ck-buddy to a libertine dandy (newcomer Fu'ad Ait Aattou, with lips mo puffy than Liv Tyler and Angelina Jolie's combined), who's supposedly ready to leave that life and lust behind and start a new one with a virginal aristocrat (see 'Put On The Green Light' below). Asia won't let him go easily, and time and time again, he finds himself right where be belongs: between her thighs. Their love knows no bounds, from literally licking their wounds to banging right next to the funeral pyre of their dead baby, and we dare you to not drop your pants watching what has gots to be one of the steamiest and sultry flicks to fog up screens this summer. What was particularly impressive about Mistress is that it's the first film we've seen this year to perfectly meld Argento's limited acting talent with her luscious other talents (read: hamazing body we pray to every night). The again, it's not much of a challenge when her other two films were were the sloppy Boarding Gate and the silly Mother of Tears

Put On The Green Light: we want to French kiss all of Roxane Mesquida's public and private parts

[peep her NSFWness in French Playboy and filmjizzdom]

Verdictgo: Jeepers Worth A Peepers

Finding Amanda
Some Things Are Better Off Lost
Trailers & Mo

Raise yer hand out there if you're ready for Matthew Broderick to leave behind his current typecast of hateable loser, which was kick-started to a tee with Election, and return to the glory days of lovable schmoe that seemed to rule the 80s. We can't see your hands, but we'll assume you agree with us that enuff is enuff and if so, then you can pass on Finding Amanda. In the film, Brods is a gambler with a wife (cutie mgcee Maura Tierney in yet another nothing role) that wants him to stop gambling and he wants to make his wife happy, but he can't stop gambling. Anywho, his wife's niece has become a Vegas prostitute (Brittany Snow channeling Mandy Moore's character from American Dreamzzzzzzzzzzzzzz) and someone needs to FIND her and get her a$$ to rehab or something. Horseface's hubby volunteers himself and the guy who shouldn't be gambling is off to the mecca of gambling. Stuff happens, stupid stuff happens, Steve Coogan doesn't make anything happen, nothing happens, a lil more happens than what happens in The Happening, and before you know it, Ferris wises up and the credits roll. Bueller needs a day on!

Name We Want To Smoke Out Of: Jenni Blong, who's supposedly the girl with the monkey in that Capital One ad

Verdictgo: Very Very Very Little Merit But No Stinkin Badges

(on) all four(s) films open today in limited release

until next thyme the balcony is clothed...