Thighs Wide Shut Thighs Wide Shut

Friday, February 15

Dance Dance Devolution

Step Up 2 The Streets
410h Yeaaaaaah!!!
Trailers & Mo

Had we never been entranced slightly amused by Step Up 1 [TWS review] you wouldn't be reading this right now. And if you never saw Step Up 1, you probably shouldn't bother with its sequel, which really has nothing to do with the first one, other than the locations and a brief dancing cameo by Channing Tatum (G.I. Joer Duke). The cast refresh for SU2TS is a good thing, although the faux Channing Tatum isn't as charming as the real thang, and going from Rachel Griffiths to this d-bag is beyond a Step DOWN. And the plot? Who cares when there's plenty o' gyratin' and ass-shakin' to be done (esp in that hot wet scene at the end), that's all nicely packaged in a PG-13 kinda way. This baby is (Balti)more or less the bestest/worstest dance sequel since Breakin' 2: Electric Boogaloo, even if it make about as much sense as Giuliani's presidential campaign. What more is there to say cept Briana Evigan > Jenna Dewan, duhvs!

we hope to see Evigan (who reminds us of a younger version of Lisa Sheridan) again and again

John Grisham's Jizzum (aka Verdict): sorta Jeepers Worth A Peepers, but only if you enjoyed SU#1

The Who Cares Which Project
Trailers & Mo

85 minutes of shaky camera work is quite the assault on the eyes. But we'd choose that torture 4 zillion outta 4 zillion and 1 times instead of listening to the character 'Hud' babble on for any longer than 3 seconds. The special effected destruction of NYC was purty darn cool, but giving it the backseat to the perils of a few lameazoid twentysomethings was the wrong way to go. So what woulda been the right way? A film adaptation of the classic game Rampage. Not a total loss, cause we'd totally bang Odette Yustman in that hole in her shoulder. YUMM-O!!

John Grisham's Jizzum (aka Verdict): Sum Merit But No Stinkin Badges

both flicks be in theaters NOW

until next thyme the balcony is clothed...