Thighs Wide Shut Thighs Wide Shut

Monday, April 2

Ticket To Hide


For butter or for wurst, Coney Island is changing. Astroland opened its amusement park for it's last season ever yesterday, before some jerko co named Thor Equities turns it and a bunch of other bits of the CI into a year round Times Square on the Beach, complete with hotels, condos, and other things mondo (be sure to czech out these banana plans for redevelopment here). However, the famed and muss ride before you die coaster The Cyclone will live on. Same goes for the Wonder Wheel, although who knows what will become of the rest of Deno's park, Shoot The Freak, or the horrid eateries that reside on the boardwalk. Some shiz is already gone. I almost cried AND died when I saw this


Since the future's picture is so darn cloudy, I'm having a hard time forming an opinion. Like Michael Scott, I see this as a lose/lose, win/lose, compromise, win/win, and win/win/win [from episode 'Conflict Resolution' + vid bonus]. Boviously, when old things get torn down, and bits of history become history, it can't be a good thing. However, lettuce be honest here folks, it's not like all of these spots are worth saving. Coney Island has been kickin it as a destination for fun since the mid to late 1800s (that's 19th century for you history buffs!), and hit it's peak in the '40s

But most of that ancient goodness has already disappeared. The things most worth saving are still and will be around for generations to come. And besides the Wonder Wheel & the Cyclone, every other ride is a bunch of unfun crap from the 60s on. While Astroland's dumpiness certainly adds 'charm' to the area, I can't say that I'll really miss it when it's gone. Then again, who knows what they'll be replacing it with, but I hope for the best, as I prepare for the wurst. So before anything drastically changes for good, I'll be Coney Island/Stillwell Avenue bound and gagged as many times as times allow. See you there for the Nathan's diarrhea, the world's bestest coaster, or maybe even for the sloppiest-jaloopiest boobies!

Stay on top of the hot CI action by czeching out Save Coney Island• & Kinetic Carnival early and often!