Thighs Wide Shut Thighs Wide Shut

Thursday, March 2

Hotsie Totsie Tsotsi
w/40% Less Nazis!

A Clockwork Orange Free State
View Trailer

Did you hear the alternate titles they came up for this Academy Award nominee for Breast Foreign Film that may give Paradise Now a run for its dirty (princi)Palestinian money this Sunday? Boy In The Hood, City of No Gawd, Ever More Nowhere In Africa, and Menace III Society. OK, you caughts me, those aren't really alternate titles, but juss a really lame way to open this review, and did you honestly think there was another title when it has one halready that's so fun to say. Tsotsi, which translates to 'thug', 'gangster', and/or 'hoodlum', is the light hearted story of a not so light hearted South African gangsta who keeps making his worse off situation worse offer. Stealinin', gun pointinin', dice throwinin', leather jacket with the lapels up wearinin', and straight up tsotsinin', are the order of the day for our young misguided orphan Tsotsi, who loves to look straight up pimpinin' in leather jackets. Then, one day, during a routine carjack, (not to be confused with Freejack), everything changes. Tsotsi inadvertently kidnaps the carjackee's baby boy (but there be only one baby boy) and then, everything changes! Naqoyqatsi Powaqqatsi Koyaanisqatsi Tsotsi isn't the ideal father, let alone the ideal employee, ideal UN peacekeeper, ideal beekeeper (I mean, can anyone beat Ulee and his gold?), or an ideal Let's Make A Deal contestant, and then, everything changes? YES, IT DOES! Ch-ch-ch-ch-changesssssssss [d-lode] {@!#{#$@}! To spiel the beans about whatelse unfolds would change everything, so I'll refrain like Andy Dufresne. All I have to say is Tsotsi!!!!!!!

Recommended for those who like: Dali ants, breastfeeding, and one white guy surrounded by many a black guys (insert one white guy, many a black guy jokes here)

Possible Porno Name: Twatsi

Unsatisfied with this? Netflix The Gods Must Be Crazy

All Time Winner of Bestest Movie Mt Everest That: ends in 'si' and lets babies wear newspaper diapers!

Apt MPupil3: 'My Weakness' by Moby [d-lode]

John Grisham's Jizzum (aka Verdict): Breast In Show

Pee es - the trailer blows, but the sdtrk rox, much like Lohag circa '04