Thighs Wide Shut Thighs Wide Shut

Monday, February 6

Go Go Gadget Play!

Aside from the MacGyver pricelessnessness [via Pakula Shaker], the stellarstar halftime 'Stones Performance and Antwaan Randle El's 'gadget' play (u think Al Micheals is required to send Phil Simms a royalty check for the use of his phrase that doesn't pay?), Super Bowl XLzzzzzzzzzzzz, 'tis' commercials, and the constant hand jobbing of the Vince Lombardi trophy from both teams in Herb Ritzezque videoshoots, was a snooze and boo fest of Good Night, And Good Luck proportions, carl weathers you were a Starbucks maven (I think they stole the Skins' offensive playbook of having 21478127 chances and nothing really to show for it) or an Iron City Beer fanatical (I pray I never hear the sentence 'the Bus is coming home' again for as shlong as I live!!) Sure, tit wasn't as busted as Entertainment Weekly's use of the words 'flint' and 'flinty' in two separate short pieces describing the performances of Best Supporting Actresses' Michelle Williams ('an angry flint of a woman) and Frances McDormand ('a flinty, plain-speaking iron miner'), but it was purty darn Matt Milleniralistically close.

ENUFF. Cause I nor noone who is I should be kevetching about a football game when there won't be another til some random teams lock horns 6 mos from now in Tokyo, so lettuce move on to more pressing matters, like the CORN Me in Historyectomy!! There will be a preliminary round, with voting ending on Wednesday at 11:59pm. The top ten vote getters will make it to the next round, which will start the next day and end Sunday before the Pro Bowl begins. Don't ask me when that is cause I don't know and neither queen noor does noone else who isn't I. Fryannly, next Monday, the winner will be revealed and carried thru the streets of Beirut or Detroit! The names of the photo-choppers' below have been left off in this 1st round to first, protect the innocent, and second, save them the embarrassment of not making it to the final triple nipple dipple round robin givens!!

Breast if luck, and good night, and Zzzzzzzzzz

Note: click dem images and watch them gets bigger!!

1. The 10 Cornmandments
2. War Between The Thighs

3. Corn Is The New Ambrosia
4. Corny Smurf

5. The Garden of Eating
6. Cornmander In Chief

7. Thighrates of the Caribbean
8. Viet Corn

9. Thighed & Prejudice
10. Gawd Save The Corn

11. I Wanna Hold Your Corn
12. Corn Corn Me Do

13. CORNstory 1
14. CORNstory 2

15. Deep Corn
16. Patt(c)o(r)n

17. Napoleon Cornaparte
18. 1 Giant Corn For Mankind

19. Cornier Pasteurs
20. Corny Doody (aka Corn Poopie)

21. Stop Touching My Thigh
22. Gen Thigh E Lee

23. Corn Pack of Jackasses
24. I'm All Up In Alba's A$$

25. Opening China's Doors To Corn
26. A Fist In The Ass Is Better Than A Buck An Ear

27. Ich En Bin Thigh Master
28. Mac The Knife Some Butter On Me Corn

29. Cornback Mountain
30. Big Thigh

31. The ASSassination of HRT the VI Warshawski
32. Crossing The Corningware

33. The Offspring

via email
one vote per household

Although the Super Bowl dissed em cause they're white and not from Detroit, we still missem the likes of recently forked the peace outters, Grampa Al Lewis and some bitch named Betty Friedan. In your loving memories, we saw the Camilla Belle box office moster When A Stranger Calls. Full jizzvue forthcumming.

Signing off,

(the Jewish Peabs, as minted by the Peabs and the Coz themselfs)

Corn on the cob or the kebab? [YTMND via BVSC]