Thighs Wide Shut Thighs Wide Shut

Wednesday, February 2

The Future's So Bright,
I've Got To Spray Glade®

The Thighs Spies are at it again, and the word, my friends and Romanians, is good. Hacktually, more than good. More like couldalmostbethegreatestthingstoeverhappen good. Seriously folks. I haven't been this full of jazz since I was taped to a bed and forced to watch BET Jazz for 36 straight hours, while in the process giving meself a rusty trombone, complete with a dizzy gillespie conversion. Anywho, without further Freddy Adu, I present to you the one show that can easily turn the WB into the WBEST!

Do not be alarmed. What you just saw was no an illusion, but a pastability that may effect the future of our enterspankment as we know it. Ready for the longest sentence I've written in a while? Great! Word has it that even though the peeps over at the WB were pressured into picking Kate Boos-worth to play Lois Lane in the new Superman movie over Her Royal Thighness of Thighland the II in order to ensure the casting of her-Beyond The Dreck co-star Kevin Spacey, they were so impressed with Cuthy's screen test that they're seriously considering giving her her own super hero TV show on the WB, where she'll don some tigs tights and kick some lee major ass, that would replace Smallville when it goes the way of Encore! Encore! next year. The only negativos to this whole thing (IF it even happens) that I foresee in my ball of crystal light is that we would be deprived of seeing Cuthbert run (cause she would be flying, dumassesses) and the most underrated hotness in all of America, Chloe/Allison 'The' Mack, would be out of a job. Stay tuned. I've got 99 problems, and the WB aint one. [scoopage via Axel F's brother, Marc]

And oh, btw, Lohan, what's happened to you since I dumped yer a$$ for Supergirl? Sue you, sue me, sue everybody.