Until The Nut Comes Out

Phish
The Baker’s Dozen – Night 1
Madison Square Garden
July 21st

David Bowie is no longer with us, and yet I was super lucky to even see him 1.2 times in concert.  Junior Senior are no longer together, but caught them twice and super loved it.  I missed out on those Page/Plant shows of the 90s, but I did get to hear Robert Plant some Led Zep tunes in my ear once!  The incredible Harry Nilsson barely toured when he was living, but I only grew into his genius 17 years after his passing

As for Phish, I’ve now seen them 3 times – which means I’ve seen them more than I got to see David Bowie and Robert Plant play live combined!!!  In my mind that is plain wrong, but life doesn’t work on plain wrongs – it works on plain truths.  I’ve said before that I care not for Phish and their original music, BUT they are certainly a ball of fun to see live, and are perhaps the greatest cover band of all time!  And in fact, they covered ALL the artists I mentioned above and I loved all them covers!

Donuts are handed out every night of Phish’s ‘Baker’s Dozen’ residency at MSG, and the night’s chosen flavor sets the tone for the show.  Night one’s flavor was coconut, and while Nilsson’s ‘Coconut’ was an obvious cover choice, much to the crowd’s surprise, and to mine – they opened with a cover of Junior Senior’s ‘Shake Your Coconuts’.  The Phish phollowing probably knew zero about Jr Sr, which is fitting cause I know next to nothing about Phish, and am well versed in the Denmark’s duo oeuvre, but after 3 minutes of tearing through the rip-roaring track, band, audience and me were all on the same page from the get-go

Just keep on dancing now
Just keep on getting down
Just keep on having fun
The party’s just began

it was all such awesome plain truth!

so much so, that I won’t even bother to make up a faux setlist like I did for the previous two shows I done saw!  if only Phish did a whole Junior Senior show.  that would be something… and maybe even count as my 3rd Junior Senior show, and not a 4th Phish show  

here’s another plain truth – I will probably see Phish a 4th time.  COVER ME GOODD!!

Set One – Shake Your Coconuts (Junior Senior cover) / Martian Monster / Timber (Josh White cover) / 555 / Pigtail (Trey Anastasio song) / Halfway to the Moon / Reba / Moonage Daydream (David Bowie cover) / Walls of the Cave

Set Two – Tweezer / Seven Below /  Billy Breathes /  Sparkle / Everything’s Right (Trey Anastasio Band cover) /  Slave to the Traffic Light / Suzy Greenberg /  Coconut (Harry Nilsson cover)

Encore – The Mango Song / Good Times Bad Times (Led Zeppelin cover)

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Who’s On Furst?

Peace The Forks Out

to

Martin Landau

&

George A Romero

 

 

&

Flounder

&

 

The Director of Fcuking ROCKY and THE KARATE KID!!!

&

Chester Bennington

+

he was Kohl as ice

Prodigy of Mobb Deep

Bill Dana/Jose Jimenez

Paddington bear creator

the only professional athlete to play for Major League Baseball and NBA championship team!!!!!!!

2 Live Crew’s Fresh Kid

Clockwork Orange editor

Red West

co-inventor of the ETHERnet!

Nelsan Ellis/Lafayette Reynolds

hall of fame sportscaster

that guy!

baby Oscar from Ghostbusters II

Rolling Stones muse Anita Pallenberg

did he ever find out who moved his cheese???

Afghan Whigs guitarist

Soviet spymaster

one of the five formidable Fendi sisters

Hollywood camera operator

self-cleaning home-maker

USA womens world cup champ coach

Ms who didn’t miss

imprisoned Chinese Nobel Laureate

he gave James Bond a lift

Prince drummer

Gretzky protector

the oldest of the 12 Hart (wrestling) family children

French composer who influenced the Futurama theme song

Graceland guitarist

Michael Nyqvist/Mikael Blomkvist

he lost 27 consecutive pitching starts!

Abscam investigator 

Grotbags the witch

a guy who was in one of the Harry Potters

some Italian actor

some Skippy actor

some character actor

a mathlete

49ers punter

ASU coach

Jets LB

Patriots QB

FIFA whistleblower 

voiceover guy

Walking Dead stuntman

Elsa Martinelli

some film distributor guy

60 Minuteser

NY reporter

Houston DJ

British film critic

Sun-Times graphic designer

Gloria Estefan’s mom

Stan Lee’s wife

niece and heiress to Greta Garbo fortune

DC food guy dies by food

Mets groundskeeper

&

Site Meter, beloved site meter for ye olde school bloggerz everywhere!!

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Marvel Universe-al Help Care

Spider-Man: Homecoming
The Kid Stays In The Picture, And Then The Picture Strays From The Kid
Official Site | Trailer & Mo
PG-13 | 133 min

Somehow it took five Spider-Man movies to get us to this point – a sixth movie that FINALLY gets Peter Parker right.  Tobey Mags and Andrew Garf were fine and all, but they didn’t seem like a teen doing teeny things.  They were already too old to be properly naive and out of their depths.  Tom Holland makes for such a perfect PP that he will now forever be Peter Parker in my mind’s thigh.  YOU GO LIL TOM HOLLAND!!

They may not have gotten Aunt May right, but they definitely have gottzen Aunt May HOT!!!!  UM HELLO Marisa Tomei.  why aren’t you and your tight clothings in every movie???????

and while the high school stuff was super great (the very non-actory Jacob Batalon as Peter’s BFF felt refreshing), and Michael Keaton as Birdman/Condorman/Johnny A$$holely was a pretty good bad adversary (with a nice lil twist with him in da plot), there were some stuff that I didn’t care for whatsoever…

like the forcing of Zendaya and Donald Glover into this movie.  She serves no purpose in this movie (BUT MAYBE IN FUTURE ONES!!????), and Donald Glover was only in it cause he and the internet wanted him to be Spider-Man years back, and so you have to give him and the internet what they want, right???

And the real reason there’s more Spider-Man, even though we really don’t need more, is not only cause it’s easy $$$ to make, but really to drag poor Spidey into the web of the rest of the existing Marvel cinematic universe, and therefore render the kid into another cog of the already waaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaay too bloated Avengers posse

This Spider-Man movie excels when it focuses on Peter and Spidey, but gets muddled and repetitive once Robert Downey Jr‘s ironic Tony Stark and lame lackey Jon Favreau rear their ugly heads here there and everywhere in this picture  

By the time the smoke clears at the end of the movie, after yet another gigantic battle with too many explosions and public property destruction, you no longer feel like you’re watching a Spidey movie – just another brick in the Marvel wall.  Tear down that wall!!  These superhero movies are losing their super-ness.  Spidey Homecoming felt like a step in the right direction, only to arrive at a destination we’re sick of visiting

Cool end credits though!

Verdictgo: low end Jeepers Worth A Peepers

Spidey senses tingle a bit at a theater near jews and white nationalists

and until next thyme the balcony is clothed…

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Gorillaz In Da Midst

Gorillaz
Merriweather Post Pavilion
July 17th

How lucky are we to be alive (and well) in a day and age where we get to over-experience the genius of Damon Albarn – our most magnificent modern music maestro, master of majestic melodies in multiple multitudes?

I only discovered this man in 1998, after a former thigh mistress imparted her Blur wisdom on me.  I felt so behind (they were already on their 5th album), and dumb for being so behind on Dan Abnormal, but once bitten, 9ever smitten

Since then, it’s been nothing but Damon Albarn for me, in any shape or form, and there have certainly been a lot of forms.  Blur is what launched him into the stratosphere (WOO-WHO!!), but in their long 21st century hiatus, his idle hands were hardly anything but.  There was a fantastic teaming with Clash bassist Paul Simonon and Afrobeat drummer Tony Allen – The Good, The Bad, The Queen, another side project with Allen and RHCP’s Flea – Rocket Juice & The Moon, a (not so amazing considering how amazing he is) solo album – Everyday Robots, and other lil things here and there, but the one project that seems to capture his greatness greater than all the rest of the greatness (yes, even more than Blur!) has been Gorillaz

Now four brilliant albums deep, the Gorillaz is not only Albarn’s most tremendous accomplishment to date, but they may in fact be the best music act going IN THE WORLD!!!  I may be biased, but I am not wrong.  The Gorillaz’ albums act as a mix tape carnival of what the world sounds like, well, at least to Damon.  And we’re all ears!! He supplies the basis, and brings on a bunch of guest stars – legends, ones in the making, and people you have zero awarness of – and blends it into the best cocktail that you want to rub your cock to

On the Gorillaz’ latest go around – Humanz – it’s not more of the same – but even more insane!!!!  And when it came alive at Merriweather Post Pavilion in Columbia, Maryland (where I haven’t seen a show since 1997, when I caught the Wu-Tang Clan open for Rage Against The Machine… and then left after the Clan finished their set!), it was even more marvelous live, in the flesh… and on tape!  

Tape! as in pre-recorded video, for the contributors who couldn’t join the Gorillaz on this tour.  And in the past, that was part of the problem of their ability to tour.  The first album had few guest stars, but when their all-star studded second, Demon Days, dropped, they weren’t really into the pre-tapping stuff, and so they only staged concerts in 2 cities, for 10 shows in total (I saw 2 of them!).  That was it!  Everyone else outside of Manchester England and New York City had to suck it!  And that really sucks.  People deserved to see Demon Days toured… even if, lets say, Ike Turner and Dennis Hopper couldn’t make it to every stop (although they did film one of the shows for all to see)

But such things don’t stop the Gorillaz now.  It’s all systems go, even if some of the guest stars can’t go with them. So while Gorillaz newbies like Vince Staples, Danny Brown, Peven Everett, Jamie Principle and Pusha T (his 1st appearance on the tour) were able to join this Merriweather date, we had to make do with a pre-recorded Mavis Staples and a bunch of others.  We didn’t get De La Soul, live OR recorded, and so we didn’t get soulful De La/Gorillaz tracks, and that’s OK, cause everything we did get was amazing (although I really would have loved to have heard ‘She’s My Collar’ and ‘Charger’, which were played at other stops), and we always get Damon Albarn at every show, and he gives us his all, and all of him is all I truly need (this marks the 11th concert I’ve seen of him in some form or another.  I look forward to the next 11)

Guess if I want it all(barn), I’ll just have to quit all my jobs and follow Damon everywhere he goes.  I bet he even makes sweet music on the toilet.  Too be honest, I’d love to find out.  I’d even do the wiping!

SetlistM1 A1 / Ascension (with Vince Staples) / Last Living Souls / Saturnz Barz / Tomorrow Comes Today / Rhinestone Eyes / Sleeping Powder / 19/2000 / El Mañana / On Melancholy Hill / Busted and Blue / Let Me Out (with Pusha T) / Submission (with Danny Brown) / Strobelite (with Peven Everett) / Andromeda / Sex Murder Party (with Jamie Principle) / DARE / We Got the Power

EncoreStylo (with Peven Everett) / Kids With Guns / Clint Eastwood (with Vince Staples) / Don’t Get Lost in Heaven / Demon Days

@damonalbarn always throws the best sex murder parties!! honored @gorillaz let @dcdunsun and I attend one

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Jail, Caesar!

War For The Planet of The Apes
The Great APEscape
Official Site | Trailer & Mo
PG-13 | 140 min

If War For The Planet of The Apes is the final film of this current, modern Planet of The Apes saga cycle, then director Matt Reeves and co-writer Mark Bomback ended things on a fitting, and very high note.  Sure, War wasn’t nearly as grand or as great as Dawn was, but a lovely finish nonetheless to a refreshing set of movies that started with Rise, and hopefully leaves the door open for more simian sensations in the years to come

I don’t have much of a problem with anything that rages on in War, but it seemed like less of a War and more of an escape from prison flick, wrapped in Apocalypse Now, wrapped in a giant pile of snow.  Come to think of it – Dawn was more of a War Apes movie, and War is more like an Escape Apes movie, which should not be confused with my personal favorite Apes movie of balls thyme – 1971’s Escape From The Planet of The Apes

OK, so I’m gonna complain a lil bit… but when our beloved Caesar (motion-capture maestro Andy Serkis) [spoiler alert] gets captured in this new movie by the latest human menace nemesis Woody Harrelson (who I thought would be terrible in this movie, but he actually made it work), I don’t understand why he doesn’t take out the king of the apes right then and there.  He lets him live, and in turn, give his fellow apes in bondage hope.  Look, I get it.  If he kills Caesar in the middle of the movie, then it wouldn’t make for a good rest of the movie, but I dunno, maybe spice things up a bit?

Well, they did spice things up a bit.  They give us an adorable mute human girl (Amiah Miller) taken in by the apes, who’s like Aliens‘ Newt for a whole new generation!  And that plate faced orange ape Maurice steals the fcuking show and rocks the fcuking house being all smart and sensible and sensitive and juss all around awesome!!!  Oh, and we get a NEW talking ape (Steve Zahn), who’s like the perfect comic relief for a movie that doesn’t have much to laugh at or relief from endless violence!

This new saga covered the Genesis and Exodus of the apes, but where do we go from here?  Planet of The Apes: Leviticus!!!

Verdictgo: high end Jeepers Worth A Peepers

Go ape for Apes today at a theater near jews and white nationalists

and until next thyme the balcony is clothed…

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